Marietta Watch

Last Call for Sanity

2006-11-04T09:50:00.000-05:00

The "debates" about the two ballot initiatives provided glimpses into the sharp piercing intellects of some of our local leaders. Your friend and humble narrator is mostly referring to Head Wound Harry Vukovic and Robin Bozian- leaders of what yours truly refers to as the forces of stupidity and darkness. Their statements during the debates and elsewhere in recent days are chock full of lies and distortions, but who among us is surprised at that?

Let's start with Bozian's performance. She began to lie the second her mouth started moving. Take this gem for example: "The public has been told over and over again that Marietta cannot afford any building expansion because the general fund is broke. This is false. Not one dime of general fund money would be spent to build a justice center or any building expansion." What Bozian completely failed to acknowledge is that General Fund money has already been spent on the Municipal Fortress of Vengeance. Bozian and all the other legal worms who try to invoke this argument, including and especially Council President and jurist Paul Bertram, should look on page 50 of the 2004 state audit report. That is where one will find that the city's General Fund spent $321,310 in 2004 on the project. Not only did the General Fund spend more than $300,000, but that money was spent during a year that auditors say the balance of the fund went from almost $3,000,000 down to barely $290,000.

Bozian did not deign to comment on the fact that the project has been atrociously managed since its inception. By now most people know that judge emeritus Milton Nuzum hired an architect that was not legally allowed to work on the Marietta project, nor on any other project anywhere in the country. As it is, the city has spent over $1,000,000 -half of it from the General Fund, Robin- with nothing to show for it but potential shame for the responsible parties. Nuzum and his disciples that still populate the court and City Council should be ashamed that they gave money to a fraudulent architect. Instead, those who should feel shame at the way they have managed the project seem to imply that because the project has been botched at every step thus far, thereby costing even more, it should go ahead.

The rest Bozian's arguments weren't based on a lie like the General Fund claim. The balance of her performance was the usual recital of how bad the current facility is. Bozian made no attempt to address the possibility of solutions other than a $5- or $6 million building. She did not mention that it was revealed in the Boyer-Halliday debate that the municipal court has the ability to and already does schedule some matters for the county's building. She did not mention the possibility of relocating the Mayor's staff to another building and renovating the existing one for a small fraction of the cost of a new building.

Bozian and the rest of her ilk believe in the promise of a new building and only a new building. They are, in fact, a very closed-minded group of people. Whether you think they are pursuing a new building out of personal reasons or for the greater good, it's undeniable that the proponents of a new building are completely unwilling and unable to consider different options. That's precisely why the moratorium should pass on Tuesday.

Another close-minded booby who performed at the debate was everyone's favorite head wound survivor- Tom Vokovic. At this point, yours truly assumes that Head Wound Harry has personally preached to everyone in town on the evils of performance audits. Preached to and lied to, that should read. It takes a bit more to parse his lies and distortions, but doing so is always worthwhile since his shabby management of the city's finances are key to this issue.

Here's one of Head Wound Harry's favorite distortions: "Twelve to fifteen cities from the entire state of Ohio contracted for a performance audit since the program began in 1998. The state paid the entire cost of the performance audit for all but three cities. Marietta would only be the fourth city in history to spend local tax dollars on the performance audit." The first thing to note is that Head Wound Harry doesn't know how many performance audits have been conducted statewide, even after he claims to have conducted exhaustive research into them. Second, the cities that did not have to pay for performance audits were deemed by the state to be in serious peril, usually from mismanagement by city officials.

Apparently Head Wound Harry believes that Marietta would be better served if he and his money management strategies, assisted by the criminal city auditor, were allowed to completely ruin the town's finances, because then the state would do a performance audit for free. Head Wound likes to paint himself as open to new ideas, but this is not one of them. Instead of being a city that takes charge of its own future by taking an innovative step (contracting for a performance audit instead of being forced to), Head Wound Harry, Brownshirt Shively and Turd Burnworth want Citizens to believe they have enough wisdom and financial management skills to do it all themselves.

(On a side note, Brownshirt Shively speaking for and invoking Junior Nolan at this week's Black Sabbath was priceless.)

Another tired excuse that Head Wound Harry uses is that the performance audit won't provide anything that Council can't do for themselves. Time and again Head Wound has said that since the state learned him how to build a financial forecast, that that part of a performance audit would be useless. What's really useless is Vukovic. He's talked for months and months about how a forecast is no big deal to create. But he's not managed to create one himself, even with the available brain trust of Fart Ordham, city auditor Gollum and other past and current geniuses of Marietta municipal money management.

Head Wound also claims that Council is perfectly able to determine what sorts of changes need to be made to better provide services. From that we can deduce that Vukovich believes that having city fire stations completely empty several times a week is a smart and good way to protect and serve. Another good idea is reducing the number of police officers on patrol, to the point where in inhibits their ability to protect and serve. Moreover, Vokovich also believes that lies should be told about 'out of control' overtime by the MPD and MFD, saying that it has drained the General Fund. Sorry- your humble narrator forgot that next year the MPD is scheduled to get CDBG money to start bike patrols. But even if so, where will the money for the bike patrols come from in 2008? Does Head Wound, in all his wisdom, expect to take a chunk out of the CDBG every year forever to cover the bike patrol? Or is it just possible that the budget for next year was just an attempt to make it look like Council understands that safety-services in town are stretched too thin, but not really do anything about it? After all, the city can't afford to hire more cops and firefighters because there's a $5,000,000 building to construct -and the lawyers on Council REALLY want that building. So if you feel that the current crop of city council members has been handling Marietta's finances in a smart and impartial way, don't vote for the performance audit.

However,

If you suspect that outside eyes could be helpful-

If you think that maybe, just maybe, Vukovic's main interest is not the commonwealth but helping cover up past misdeeds by Council while at the same time crippling the Mayor-

If you suspect that Vukovic and other past and current members of Council passed into law a 2005 budget that was based on a multi-million dollar lie-

If you think it's a possibility that Council is made up of a rogue's gallery of Marietta's worst (a cheating teacher, a hit and skipper, several imbeciles, a dingy lying poet who writes odes to his longtime companion and so on)-

Then you should vote for the performance audit.

It's been written in this space before, but is worth repeating: should either or both measures fail, the results will be disastrous for our once fair town. The forces of darkness and abject stupidity will then be emboldened. As such, it will surely come to pass that Marietta will get a free performance audit one day.

Good Luck!

Hit and Run Fun

2006-10-17T07:00:00.000-04:00

Your humble narrator could hereupon give an explanation of absence, but very few gentle readers would believe any of it. Therefore yours truly will simply pick up the pitiful pieces left of Marietta and examine them.

The first issue that has to be addressed is the lawless, shameless, dangerous, and otherwise contemptible behavior of comrade Randall R. Burnworth. This doofus, who was so concerned for pedestrian safety during discussions of the ‘land train’; this lawyer who sits on Council only to further his Justice Center agenda; this beetle-headed flat-eared knave, who huffs and puffs and likes to throw his considerable though inconsequential weight around and who hit a preteen on a bike with his truck, is a turd. Sure, that’s low brow language. Sure it lessens the quality of political discourse in our once fair hamlet. But on the other hand, a fat cat "lawyer" who hits a kid, tells the kid to walk it off, does not get the kid’s name and phone number, nor offer his, and then does NOT report the incident to the police is a turd.

When one places Turd Burnworth’s behavior alongside that of his fellow Councilpersons, it is painfully and manifestly obvious that Marietta is being governed by a pack of slimes. Judy Wray stole, copied and likely distributed answers to state education tests. Brownshirt Shively has a way of making sure projects that will benefit her and/or her neighborhood get passed. Sam Gwinn is a puppet for whoever has their hand up his backside on a given day. Council president Bouncy Bertram resembles a sluggardly lion tamer wearing prime rib (or rump roast if you prefer) underpants. Tom Vukovic and his mentor and muse Art Fordham allowed and assisted in a multi-million dollar fraud upon the city that is still being paid for and straightened out. And that’s just the legislative branch of local government.

Let’s take a close look at that last one. As has been reported in the legitimate media, water rates are about to be raised again. It has been stated here several times, but is obviously worth doing so again: the city of Marietta has NO cash problems. Moreover, the city’s water and sewer funds continue to have multi-million dollar balances. The problem isn’t money; it’s money management. The plain fact is that Head Wound Harry, the anti-auditor and the rest of the stumblebums have no idea how to fix the problems they have wrought. They cannot straighten out the books, so the only way they know to solve these problems is to bring more money into the city. Be prepared then, gentle readers, because after the water rates go up, all the other fees in town will follow just as soon as the Maximus study gives little Tommy Head Wound and his fellow mental midgets permission to do so.

What’s that you say? There’re two ballot initiatives that are gonna right all these wrongs? Gonna stop the Justice Center dead in its tracks and get a performance audit done to get genuine financial data? Well, don’t be so sure about that either, dear readers. It concerns your humble narrator that it’s apparently assumed these measures will pass. Where is the discussion about them? Where is the publicity? The advertising? The mailers? Posters? Roadside signs? Where indeed. Those who are ‘leading’ the initiative efforts seem to believe that all was needed was to get the things on the ballot. Unfortunately that’s not the case.

Should they both pass, the issues on the ballot will only address symptoms, not the root problems facing Marietta. A performance audit is not charged with uncovering hidden accounts, wading through innumerable cash transactions (like, say, Aquatic Center receipts) looking for misdeeds, nor will a performance audit catalog other malfeasance wrought upon Marietta’s finances. A performance audit will only give suggestions to better manage our once fair town, not mandate such changes and certainly not enforce them. But evidence already clearly shows that no one in our municipal government is interested in better management. Otherwise, the multi-million dollar fraud committed by Council and the anti-auditor would have already resulted in resignations (other than Fart Ordham’s) and scorn for those who committed it. Now comes word that the state audit for 2005 (i.e., when the fraud went down) will not appear before the performance audit election. An interesting way to give those responsible for the swindle some extra time to concentrate on the election. For example, the lead criminal in this fraud, Art Fordham, has actually been given the task of treasurer for Judge Boyer’s re-election campaign. How’s that for law and order?

Moving on from money crimes to crimes against architecture, the result of a new Justice Center moratorium will not result in an improved court for Marietta. Again, if Marietta’s elected officials were interested in a better court (instead of a new court), they would have spent a million dollars on upgrading the current facility and taking other measures. More than a million dollars has already been spent on a building that doesn’t exist, except in the minds of Marietta’s legal eagles and one turd. That million dollars thus far has been spent on drawings, more drawings, and trips back to the drawing board to remove plasma-screen televisions from the would-be boondoggle. Despite what you may have heard, the current building can be upgraded for something like a million dollars. But Marietta’s razor sharp legal minds and the turd aren’t interested in actually making the court handicapable accessible. They could hold sessions down the street right now if that was the goal. And a million bucks could buy some really nice extra space, or rent out another space for the Mayor’s staff. But no, a practical solution isn’t the goal. A new building, that’s the goal.

Passage of the moratorium then is just the first step and passage of the performance audit the last step in their respective processes. Supporters of such ballot measures usually take some time and effort to lay out their ideas, arguments, plans, solutions and so on. In the case of the two initiatives here, supporters seemingly believe that time and voter sentiment are on their side, and that with passage comes sweeping change. But so much effort, time and money have gone into the un-‘Taj Mahal’ and the municipal fiduciary frauds that two ballot measures, backed up with no campaigns, are not enough to turn the tide. The case for the performance audit should be about the deep, systemic, arrogant and dangerous mismanagement that current and immediate past members of Council have perpetrated. The discussions for the Justice Center moratorium should include serious and varied options for a different solution to the problem and how we can begin to implement them on November 8.

Most baneful of all is the prospect that both ballot measures fail. The forces of stupidity and criminality would be emboldened while those who prefer to keep the boat nice and unrocked, thank you very much, would be satisfied. And then next up will be a truly numbing selection of ballot measures in the spring, such as the Armory demolition, tax increases, and whatever other cockamamie contrivance the turd, the brownshirt, the head wound, the cheater and the puppet can cook up. The campaigns behind the current initiatives would also provide fertile ground for those who are interested in replacing the Coven of Cowards as soon as possible. That’s why the effort should be as broad and loud as possible.

All those who crowded into the building at Lookout Park to rail against Head Wound Harry’s opposition to the Kris-Mar property would do well to rev up their activist tendencies again. Your humble narrator was truly impressed by the passion, intelligence and resolution from those who changed the tide for the land deal. But make no mistake, Arcadian comrades, if Marietta’s financial picture doesn’t get put right and quick, LL Bean-attired tourists hiking and pedaling through town won’t be enough to save it. As pissed off as you all were about Vukoovic’s insensible obstruction for the land, you should be all the more pissed about the gross multi-million dollar fraud he committed and the way he’s about to steal more money out of our pockets. Money that government simply does not need. Do any of you trail supporters think that people and businesses want to locate to a town where the local government increases taxes and increases them again, then increases fees, while at the same time cutting funding to the police and fire departments? You all put the fear into Head Wound Harry once on what comparatively is really a small and trivial matter. So now do it again with something of consequence.

Make no mistake; yours truly is not belittling what the Earth Day crowd did. Scaring the pee out of Vukovic is always worthwhile and the trail will make a nice addition to the town, but only if there’s a town left in fifty years. One more time- if our town isn’t a positive, stable, relatively cheap and safe place to live, all the amenities in the world won’t save it. Frankly, that means there is a lot of work still to be done. The events of the Kris-Mar meeting have long since been overshadowed by more ominous developments, like the ongoing and worsening trend at the MFD whereby all stations are completely empty several times a day, leaving the department unable to respond to calls. In such cases, nearby volunteer departments are called into action. For some idiots in town, this is an indication that volunteer departments can handle all such duty. Those cretins ignore the fact that local VFD’s are staffed with off-duty professional firefighters from the MFD (thereby adding to their already strained workload). Instead of giving the department back money they earn through the EMS fees, the pathetic slugs on Council hand that money over to anti-auditor Sharon Adams so she can hide the money or use it to cover up some error she made or really for whatever she wants, since she has no oversight and has repeatedly moved large amounts of money around without authorization or subsequent reprimand from Council.

Let’s not forget the MPD here. Perhaps you’ve heard about the innovation cooked up by the Mullen administration and Council to proved bike patrols to blighted or potentially blighted neighborhoods. Note that in none of the coverage of this scheme have we read about what the MPD thinks of it and when it will start. How come the announcement of the money was the first time anyone had heard about bike patrols? Did Council get input for this scheme from the MPD? And did Council, in all its wisdom, consider using some CDBG money to hire a firefighter? And one more thing, when was the last time a meth lab was busted by a bike patrol? Maybe that’s something the legitimate media can investigate.

Here’s another idea for an investigation: reporters who are hostile to their communities, petulant about their jobs and how such attitudes affect their coverage. Some if not most readers have already read the following email, but for those who are unfamiliar, here’s a bit of background. As part of their coverage of the Riverfront Roar, the Daily Dog Trainer ran an article that gave the false impression that businesses downtown did not go the extra mile to capitalize on the tourist crowd. Those who actually know downtown business owners knew right away that such a story had to be wrong. The merchants themselves were righteously peeved and rebuked the ‘reporter’ responsible for such tripe. Here is the ‘reporter’s’ response [Format altered for emphasis. -Ed]:

"From: Diana DeCola [mailto:ddecola@mariettatimes.com]
Sent: Wednesday, July 12, 2006 9:44 AM
To: [Business Owner]
Subject: Re: story correction

[Business Owner],

I appreciate your input but I did not make anybody look like bad guys and I'm not going to apologize for anything because frankly I'm tired of getting a barrage of emails everytime [sic] I do something you guys don't like. If I don't purposely paint a prettty [sic] picture of downtown everybody whines. My job is not to favor the downtown, although the lot of you would like that. I think it's a little hypocritical, too because it's not okay to write bad news but it's perfectly okay to write good news. I have done plenty of articles that say positive things about downtown. But I will tell you this, you guys [sic] own businesses, you don't own the town and I won't be pushed around or work at the will of the downtown merchants.

I was asked by my editor to write a sidebar story that responds to the fact that, as he was told, businesses were staying open longer on weekends and during tourist season. I reported what I saw and what was told to me. That's it. I am not going to check with every single downtown merchant and find out exactly what their [sic] hours are because, as riveting as that may be, I simply do not have that much time.

I'm sorry that you take everything so personally and you are entitled to your opinion but you chose to open a business downtown. Nobody forced your hand. If it has turned out to be harder than you thought, well that's a shame but it is not my job to boost your sales. I just do my job which is reporting. The bottom line is whether I knew exactly when places closed, the fact is they closed early, which is the opposite of late.

For the businesses that stayed open past 5 p.m. and did not see traffic after 2 p.m., that is a shame [But didn't she just say they closed early, which is the opposite of late? -Ed.]. Perhaps, you all could come up with ways to get people in your stores after 2 p.m. I don't know, though because I don't own a business and I, unlike other people, don't like telling people how to do their job.

Diana DeCola"

Some weeks ago, yours truly wrote to the ‘editorial’ staff and ‘reporter’ in question to give any and all of them the chance to comment upon this bit of whining, snotty bilge. As of this posting, none have seen fit to do so, even if only to say that Dickola’s attitudes do not accurately reflect the management of the Marietta Times. Perhaps that’s because they do, but who can say? It’s also very interesting to note that Head Wound Harry Vukovic has repeatedly and very publicly stated his approval and admiration for DeCola’s reportage. On a sad note, since DeCola conned someone at the Career Center into believing she knows something about writing, there are some poor souls who are paying to be taught writing by DeCola. Think a moment- a future generation of ‘reporters’ being taught by the likes of Diana DeCola and Dave Grande. And some people in town think yours truly is the problem.

Property Prognostications

2006-08-17T12:26:00.000-04:00

There has been a considerable effort to support the city's acquisition of the Kris-Mar property. Unfortunately, the final decision is left in the very small (and smelly) hands of Tom 'Head Wound Harry' Vukovic. As such, here are some predictions from yours truly about tonight's black Sabbath (a.k.a. Council meeting).

- Head Wound Harry will of course ask for the matter to be reconsidered.
- Head Wound will complain about the loss of $900 to the school district.
- He will complain about the 'hidden' costs of the property.
- He will repeat the lie that the property is 'un-developable'.

Now here are the things you won't see:

- Gaping Head Wound absolutely will not acknowledge the fact that this property will tie into a nationwide walking trail system.
- He will continue to NOT state his true reasons for voting against it (i.e., Vukoovich doesn't want this to happen first and foremost because it is supported by the Mayor and also because it involves two [2] local business persons Vookuvik doesn't like or trust).

The lesson here is the same that others have already learned: When it comes to the Coven of Cowards, count on them placing their personal agendas and feelings above the good of the commonwealth. Don't say you weren't warned.

It Could Happen Here...

2006-08-15T18:28:00.000-04:00

A lot of negative news seems focused on Michigan these days, so here's a bit more...

http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/08/15/D8JH1IDG0.html

'Councilwoman Accused of Hitting Mayor

ECORSE, Mich.
A city councilwoman has been charged with two misdemeanors for allegedly choking and hitting the mayor during a council meeting.

Theresa Peguese was charged last week with assault and battery and obstruction of a government function during the July 18 council meeting.

Peguese's lawyer, Hugh Davis, said his client, who is black, was provoked when Mayor Larry Salisbury used racial slurs as they argued over a resident's request for relief from the city's zoning ordinance to build a modular home in Ecorse, a city of 11,000 about 10 miles southwest of Detroit.

Salisbury's lawyer, Bill Colovos, denied the racial slur claim and said the councilwoman was "out of control."

"This lady is in need of some serious anger management classes," said Colovos, who said he reviewed the tape of the council meeting and heard no racial slur.

Peguese could spend up to 93 days in jail if convicted.

"We admit that she had physical contact with him, but my client didn't choke him," Davis said.'

Meanwhile, back on the local front, tune back into this space soon for damming proof that the Marietta Times is actively hostile to some of Marietta's most valued Citizens.

Mediations and Preparations

2006-08-07T06:33:00.000-04:00

Let's begin where the 'legitimate media' had their focus first last week: the apparent approval for the acquisition of the Kris-Mar property. Perhaps apparent isn't the right word. It's more likely that it is only the temporary approval. Since Tom 'Head Wound Harry' Vukovic was not in attendance at this particular black Sabbath, the vote to acquire the property came down to a rare tie.

The vote was split with the usual suspects in attendance voting as one might have expected. Comrade Burnworth cited the demonstrably false claim that the property is 'undevelopable', forgetting that during its last term, a developer approached Council about the very property in question. Since the developer was seeking support from the Coven, it didn't happen. So it was that instead of a lack of interest, it was a lack of support from Council that defeated a project that Burnworth claims isn't even possible. Brownshirt Shively voted against acquiring the property because Mayor Moon is for it. Gwinn decided to vote against it this round, making this about the third time he's shifted back and forth. The remaining members of Council voted for the measure. The Council president cast the deciding vote. But that doesn't mean it's over. Head Wound Harry is entitled to ask for a reconsideration by Council.

Your humble narrator must wonder here if any of this was intentional. Head Wound Harry knew full well that this item was up for its final reading. There were no charity Scrabble tournaments to attend that night. There were no man-on-man poetry slams scheduled (according to Graffiti anyway). What then could have drawn Head Wound's attention elsewhere from his dooty on Council? He's so diligent and puts in such long hours, according to him according to his wife anyway. Was it simply to not have to vote on this and other items? After all, the Kris-Mar deal, now in its fourth incarnation, was not the only controversial item on the Coven's agenda.

Also before Council was the transfer of several tens of thousands of dollars owed the General Fund that wasn't made in a timely manner, in violation of city law. This issue speaks directly to the dank, rotted roots of Marietta's only genuine and ongoing financial problem: mismanagement. Interesting then, but perhaps not coincidental, that Council's finance committee chair was absent as that measure became law. Therefore he didn't face even the possibility of having to comment about why the measure was needed in the first place or why he and his mentor, male muse, and predecessor Fart Ordham neglected to follow city law and thereby shortchange the General Fund in a time of 'crisis'.

Even though Head Wound Harry was absent, the black Sabbath was not without its usual dose of mischief. This time it was provided by the brownshirt with a pageboy, Kathy Shivley. Though the city's contract with the Marietta Fire Department lapsed nine months ago and the process handed over to arbitration, the brownshirt was allowed to scuttle passage of the mediated contract at the last possible moment, citing her own ignorance. Though her admission of incognizance is refreshing, it's also quite unnecessary. By thinking she has any right to change terms of the grossly overdue mediated contract, the brownshirt demonstrated quite a bit of ignorance. Doing the same thing to the Teamsters' contract was pretty insolent and ignorant too, but she apparently decided she was on a roll.

Yours truly has been insulted and impugned because of strong and unhesitating support for the MFD, but it's time to do so again. Fact is, in communities where sanity is more common, there is pride in and support for their professional fire departments. Fully staffed, ultra modern and far reaching professional fire departments are strong selling points in other communities, quite simply because they matter to people. Make no mistake- there is pride and support here, from the Citizens. Unfortunately, that support has not been translated into action by those in government. And of course this is not the only incidence of Council ignoring the strong voice of Citizens. Therein lies the key difference with other communities. In some cities members of Council are more interested in Civic improvements and the commonwealth than they are with improving drainage in their own neighborhoods, or having their road paved, or building a shiny new building in which to practice shysterism. Though barely a wart on a state road, Nelsonville is concretely supportive of its professional FD and its officials consider any talk of moving to a volunteer FD as ridiculous. The Coven's lack of support for the MFD is deeper than just one issue though.

Take the Kris-Mar deal as an example. Put aside the usual facts regarding how badly the Mayor has managed the process. Consider instead how Council seems desperate to not want to show positive support for Marietta in Marietta. Put another way- if Council doesn't want to spend money on Marietta's future, why should they expect anyone else to? Since the Kris-Mar property was to tie into a national trail system, the measure was perhaps more forward thinking and potentially "impactful" than any section of paved bike path along the river. But unlike the bike path, the Kris-Mar deal came from the Mayor and not Head Wound Harry or the brownshirt. Therefore it was doomed.

Council is even unwilling to spend part of money from the Gutberlet estate to stop the Armory from rotting. Apparently they are hopeful that the building Mrs. Gutberlet intended to save will fall apart before they spend any of the money, freeing it up for something like covering another budgetary fraud or better yet, as part of the down payment on a new legalistic bordello.

The last waste of municipal money claimed to be for the commonwealth was the Aquatic Center. Evidence of how horrendously poor the oversight of that project was will be trickling out soon as state auditors try to untangle the mess created by Fart Ordham and the anti-auditor during Ordham's last days in office, for which he received a state commendation. Setting aside the financial nightmare of its construction, it has never been claimed that the facility will make any sort of money at all past four or five years out. Even the city's recreation director (and Marshall of a horde of teens inspecting bags for contraband food) has stated publicly and repeatedly that she expects the Aquatic Center to be a money loser for the city within a few years. So even if one chooses to believe those who claim the pool has made money so far, those same people admit that it won't last for long.

Incidentally, all of this is why letters from Mrs. Fart Ordham have begun to appear in the Daily Dog Trainer extolling the wonders and virtues of the Aquatic Center. It's the last and most telling legacy of Arthur's time on Council. If the Aquatic Center is seen as a gigantic money-wasting failure, it will be remembered that Asinine Art was a strong supporter of the project. So confident was he, that he thought it unnecessary to watch the spending. To be fair though, he wasn't watching any of the spending anywhere in the city. Even amidst claims of impending financial ruination, Asinine Art found a way of supporting unquestioningly a water park, using federal money intended to benefit less prosperous Citizens. Others found ways and continue to find ways of excluding those less prosperous Citizens from that water park. But that's how things work in municipal government, Marietta style.

Because according to the working rules for current members of the Coven, and other members of municipal government, if it benefits them personally (street or water system improvements or a new place to work), then support it without question, which makes it easier to find a way to make it happen. However, if it comes from the Mayor or benefits the community as a whole (the Armory as community center, a green space plugged into a national trail, a fully staffed MFD or just a contracted MFD), defeat it at all costs. Perhaps though, none of us should be surprised that those who choose to run for Council have such corrupt and narrow goals. Few others seem willing to take on the burden and responsibilities. So our once fair town is governed by those who have personal agendas (does anyone believe comrade Burnworth is on Council for any other reason than getting the hall of justice built?) or those who think elected office translates to some sort of popularity (the Mayor) or those who've infested the halls of government so long they're completely unequipped for life and work in the real world (the anti-auditor). It is to be devoutly hoped that in addition to the support for current ballot initiatives and juicier petitions slated for January 1, 2007, preparations are being among a new batch of Citizens willing to reclaim responsibility for our fair town from this infestation of pests.

Ballots and Bollocks

2006-07-30T10:23:00.000-04:00

So comrade councilperson Randall Burnworth had narrowed it down to six (6) people against the hall of justice project? He did say that, so it might be interesting for someone in the 'legitimate media' to record for posterity his reaction to the news of the week- that several hundred Citizens seem to be against the project. Several hundred also seem to be in favor of a performance audit, but we'll get to that later.

The apparent success of the petition drives should be sobering medicine to those on the Coven. Yours truly suspects that they and other nogoodniks, such as the anti-auditor, drew some comfort from the failure of the bed tax and Maximus repeal effort. Since those petitions died piteously, the Coven and anti-auditor may have thought it showed that most people were supporting them and not the petitions. Unfortunately it has subsequently become clear that the repeals failed not because of a lack of Citizens outrage, but because of poor planning. Also unfortunate: the CVB and Chamber now look weak and shoddy. (Here's some free advice to those groups- next time you want to organize a petition drive, ask a leper to lead the effort instead of Dave Grande.) By almost doubling the number of required signatures, the audit and Taj Mahack petitions show convincingly that the Citizenry is wary of the Coven's behavior and demands change.

That's not to say that the forces of idiocy won't mount a vigorous defense in coming days and weeks leading up to the fall election. As your humble narrator has already predicted, look for complaints about how much the ballot initiatives will cost. Remember- despite huge increases in tax revenues (See last post. -Ed.) the city is supposed to be in a money crunch. Therefore the anti-auditor and Head Wound Harry are likely to start complaining about the cost of Citizens having say in the welfare of our town. Comrade Burnworth and a slew of other lawyers will start whining about ADA lawsuits, lack of space and/or security and will presumably start work on a newer, longer enemies list. What none of them will do is address the core reasons for the Citizens' disgust.

So we won't see a long, serious and honest look into the financial operations of the city. We won't hear a discussion about the gross and intentional malfeasance that gave us the fraudulent 2005 city budget. We certainly will not hear a discussion about the criminally negligent fiscal oversight of the Aquatic Center project. (After all, if it's shown that they couldn't manage building a pool, who would want them to build a justice center?) Don't expect to hear an honest discussion about how Council finance committee chairs Fart Ordham and Head Wound Harry Vukovic have allowed the anti-auditor to manipulate city finances without regard to law and common sense. Don't plan on hearing discussions about ways other than an ugly new building to provide the court with more space. And above all dear readers, don't expect any honesty from those on the Coven when it comes to these issues.

We already know that comrade Burnworth was less than honest about the number of opponents to the hall of justice. Now we also have pretty telling proof that Head Wound Harry lied about performance audits. Shocking, true, but there it was, all over the 'legitimate media' this week. On Thursday, WMOA ran a story about how cities have found performance audits useful. Here are some highlights from that story: "…surveyed a sample of communities who have conducted performance audits in recent years and found unanimous praise for the audit. … Two prominent elected officials in the City of Fostoria said that the audit findings are used on a regular basis to continue to make improvements to better operate city departments. … One official in Galion said that everyone he has talked to who understands municipal finance is in favor of a performance audit. He dismissed the notion that the performance audit is vague and pointed to the fact that some audits are 200 to 300 pages in length. … The performance audit for the City of Jackson outlined ways to establish standard operating procedures, clarify duties of each city employee, better gauge and then utilize public concerns, ways to improve public services, strategies for reducing overtime, and numerous specific revenue enhancements and cost reductions. The audit also contained ways to restructure various city departments to better deliver services and to meet peer benchmarks."

Your humble narrator pulled out a lot from that story because each passage directly refutes claims made publicly and repeatedly by Head Wound Harry Vookoovich. Moreover, they refute his claims that specific cities say the audits are worthless. Not only did Head Wound Harry say they are useless, but he also claimed that officials in Jackson say the same thing. If you've not done so, click on the link above and read the whole story, then print it out and carry it around with you to ward off Head Wound Harry next time he's stalking people on Front Street spreading misinformation about performance audits.

"But hang on, Professor," some are likely saying, "the Daily Dog Trainer ran a story on Saturday with the headline 'Performance audits' value uncertain'. So what's the real deal?" The real deal is that the headline didn't match the contents of the story. Four cities are discussed and officials in all but one agree that the performance audits are useful. In some circles a 75% approval rating means something isn't "uncertain" but not for the crackerjack Dog Trainer staff. The story isn't a total waste though. Since the Dog Trainer mostly talked to the same cities mentioned in the earlier WMOA story, we have further proof that Head Wound Harry seems to have been something less than honest when he claimed that the fine people of Jackson think the audits are only good for "political cover". Surely though, that doesn't mean Head Wound Harry would be less than honest about other things, does it?

Speaking of less than honest, it's past due that yours truly clarify the issue of the Coven's pay raise. When brownshirt Cathy Shively claimed that she had not voted for and had not received a pay raise, she was precisely correct, but only in a Clintonian sense. It's true that Shively was not on Council during the last term, when the pay raise was passed. It's also true that pay raise has not happened yet. However, it is slated to begin in January of 2007. So while she and comrade Burnworth and the rest of the all stars of the municipal league haven't seen pay raises yet, they will in the new year. That is not to say that they will enjoy those raises all year. After all, your humble narrator knows full well there are calendar watchers out there waiting for January 1, 2007.

By the by, it may be grim humor for some, but the Coven passed said pay raise in order for members to receive full-time retirement benefits from the state. Interesting how these layabouts are so concerned with their twilight years. In an ideal world, the state would indeed be providing for them in those years, complete with a smallish 6' by 10' apartment and three meals a day. Alack alas, that doesn't seem to be in the offing. Even disgraced though shameless cheater and Councilperson Judy Wray is reportedly going to get retirement benefits. Perhaps that's the American dream for her ilk- people without a future and a lackluster past taken care of by the Citizenry they've cheated.

But let us not end this session on a negative. Let's be positive. Don't let Head Wound Harry tell you performance audits are worthless, be positive and say you know differently. Don't let comrade Burnworth try to count all the way to 828 by himself, be positive and help him when he gets past 10. But the most positive thing you can do is remember that November is soon and January is right on its heels.

Nattering Nabobs and Nincompoops

2006-07-23T07:50:00.000-04:00

To start off, let's vivisect one of the frequent arguments being used against the petitions/ballot initiatives. Some people are claiming that such efforts are somehow contrary to our system of government. Take this sample from a Daily Dog Trainer letter: "I strongly believe that the referendum process is flawed and the antithesis of our chosen form of government. We elect our City Council members to represent us and, hopefully, our views on the operation of this city. That means, for better or for worse, they get to choose and decide. But, a plebiscite when a group of the citizens disagrees with an act of council serves to undermine the form of government we use." Such sentiments have a convenient way of neglecting the fact that recalls, petitions and ballot initiatives are built into the form of government we use. Far from "undermining" our government, when Citizens decide that those who've been elected to tend the commonwealth are not doing so, then Citizens have a right as well as a way to take action. That's really how the system is structured. After all- these ideas came from the Ohio Revised Code, not "The Turner Diaries". Anyway, since some members of the Coven have been quoted recently as suggesting a citywide ballot initiative regarding the Armory, none of them should be complaining.

Of course, the suggestions by the Coven regarding the Armory issue really amount to an effort to kill the whole restoration effort. Even yours truly recognizes that a new levy to pay for the Armory would likely fail. The other mentioned possibility is putting Mayor Mullen's current 'plan' for the facility on the ballot. But Mullen's alleged plan is not the only possibility for the Armory. Maybe voters should simply be asked whether or not the city should spend the $533,000 bequeathment to fix the roof. Otherwise the Coven will sit on that money, not spending it as they should, while the rain pours in through the ceiling. Once the roof is fixed, there would be ample time to develop a serious and viable plan for the building. After the roof is stabilized, real life business professionals would be more willing to look into the possibilities of the building and they would most probably have better ideas than the Mayor. If you want to plan a hootenanny, call Moon Mullen. But if you want to renovate a military facility- don't.

While we're tossing around ideas for more ballot initiatives, how about one regarding funding and staffing for the Marietta Fire Department? This is a valid concern since it's clearer than ever that Marietta is NOT suffering from an income crisis. Remember- one of the most frequent complaints heard from elected officials, most especially the anti-auditor and certain members of the Coven, is that Marietta is strapped for income. That is the key excuse why all money from the EMS fees 'must' be left in the city's General Fund. How then to explain this from the Daily Dog Trainer: "Commenting on the auditor's revenue report, committee chair Tom Vukovic noted that at the year's halfway mark, real estate taxes are up by 39 percent. He also said income tax collection was up $281,980 for the year." Whoa now- read that again. Halfway through the year and income tax revenue is up more than a quarter of a million dollars? So what was the need for the trifling bed tax increase? The $70,000 from the bed tax increase is less than a fourth of the increase already seen in income taxes. In a well-governed Marietta, such news would mean that the MFD could use some of the EMS money for the MFD. But we all know this ain't a well-governed Marietta.

The increase in revenue really shouldn't come as much of a surprise to readers of this space. It's been known for a long time that revenues are not going down. Between the increases in tax collections and 'belt tightening' measures adopted by Council since last year, the city has already more than made up for the $1,400,000 shortfall written into the 2006 city budget. So where has all that money been going? No one can say and no one is yet willing to look into it.

Evidence that the money isn't being managed well was right there in plain view at the Coven's most recent Black Sabbath. At that meeting, the Coven heard first reading of an ordinance to pay the state auditor's office an extra $5,000 to "prepare financial statements" for the city for the year 2005. The state auditors would be doing this work on top of the regular audit of city finances. Absolutely no one in the 'legitimate media' has looked into this, but the meaning is obvious: the city does not have adequate financial statements for the year 2005. The only comment from a member of the Coven about this matter came from "Head Wound Harry" who only mentioned it so he could make sure everyone knows that the city is already paying over $60,000 for the regular audit. Instead of whining about the freaking price though, perhaps Head Wound Harry should be asking why in Hell the city has to pay the extra five grand when we're already paying the anti-auditor many times that amount to provide what are supposed to be usable financial statements.

Perhaps we shouldn't be so hasty in picking on the poet Head Wound Harry. Not only is he busy skulking up and down Front Street talking down performance audits and those in favor of them, he's also really busy planning to develop a financial forecast. His excuse for not having one completed yet is that the assistant safety-service director recently quit, so now poor Head Wound Harry has to start all over again, with a new 'workshop' for the new ASS director, the anti-auditor and the other heavyweights of Marietta's money management brain trust. Anyway, the forecast isn't done, might be done, but just so you know, Head Wound Harry says it will "take time and effort", so don't get your hopes up.

Presumably it took "time and effort" for comrade councilperson Randall Burnworth to count to six, but he managed to do it and we're all very impressed. Too bad he was counting- to his estimation- those who are in opposition to the justice center project. Though it's obviously news to comrade Burnworth, there are actually only about six people in favor of the project, and they're easy to spot at city Council meetings, sitting behind the table. When they show up, that is. And here's another interesting tidbit Randall may have missed: most of the supporters for the new court work in the legal profession. Weird, huh?

It's been pointed out in this space before, but Burnworth seems to have some really innovative ideas about law and government. "Innovative" in this instance meaning "insidious". Not only does comrade Burnworth see no problem with wiping out all parking laws to get one building built, and not only is he hostile to the rights of Citizens and legally binding committees who dare disagree with him, Burnworth has no problem announcing that he's drawn up an enemies list. Richard Nixon's enemies list at least had some star power (Paul Newman) and it was supposed to be a secret. Burnworth's list is a petty thing from a petty mind, which makes him, sadly, even less clever than Nixon. Yours truly hopes the comrade keeps talking. Every time he does, the true quality and caliber of justice center supporters shines anew.

A Reminder

2006-07-14T08:16:00.000-04:00

As a public service, your humble narrator now presents the following information:

Those who are interested in signing the Initiative Petitions—one of which is for the prevention of any more money being wasted on the Justice Center, and the other of which mandates that City Council enter into a contract with the State of Ohio Auditor’s office for a Performance Audit—can be signed at:

Levee House Café
Baker & Baker Jewelers
Townsquare Fabrics & Quilts
The Framing Gallery

Citizens for Responsible Government (CRG) will also have three or four locations around the downtown area for Friday evening’s Merchants’ Walk this week.

Tune in to this space tomorrow for commentary on Comrade Councilperson Burnworth's "enemies list", other thought crimes and just who is supposed to be running Marietta.

A Busy Day for the Crooked of Marietta

2006-07-11T18:32:00.000-04:00

Today's offerings in the 'legitimate media' are so rich in horse droppings, it's difficult to know where to start. Council member Vukovic is shocked about the petition drives, councilperson Burnworth cites the Development Advisory Board selectively, "law director" Riggs, and Mullen flunkies Sands and Scales don't care about the plebes or what they think. And that's all in one day.

In a WMOA story today, Tom "Head Wound Harry" Vokovich said that he was "quite surprised" that the CVB and the Chamber of Commerce are actively trying to defeat the bed tax increase. Really? Does he already forget that several members of those groups spoke directly to Council repeatedly, asking that Council not increase the tax? Is Head Wound Harry such an idiot that he thought once the increase was passed, the matter was over? Obviously, which is just further proof he really is a dunce. Get it right in your 'mind', Tommy, the days when you can just roll over your constituents are over, as is your 'career' in 'public service'.

Meanwhile in the pre-soiled pages of the Daily Dog Trainer, Head Wound Harry went on another tirade about the Evils of Performance Audits. Quoting the jackass from the story: "Have any of these people ever read a performance audit?" The answer to that question is 'Yes', most especially yours truly, who has read several of them. They outline inefficiencies in government but the real sticking point is that the city in question must have the will to change. Since Head Wound Harry has no such motivation, a performance audit would in all likelihood be useless as long as Vookoovich and the rest of these scam artists on Council. However, once they are forced out and a new Council, who wants to work steps in, they would have a nice long list of possible changes to enact.

Another point about the performance audits and Head Wound Harry: he doesn't pay attention to state auditors now, even when they inform Council of lawless behavior by city officials. The business about transfers from the water/sewer funds into the General Fund is a prime example of this. State auditors pointed out that Council did not obey one of its own laws and shortchanged the General Fund by several hundred thousand dollars. When he learned of this crime, did Head Wound Harry rush out and try to rectify the matter? No. To this day, he is still dragging his feet to transfer $70,000 legally owed the General Fund from back in 2004! So if he won't listen to state auditors about real crimes and misdemeanors (especially those of the city's criminal anti-auditor), why in Hell would he want them to take a deeper look at the books and the way the city is currently being mismanaged?

One last bit about Head Wound Harry. Since he's not working these days, being an educator and all, why hasn't he produced a financial forecast for the city yet? He stated at a recent black Sabbath (a.k.a. regular Council meeting) that producing such a forecast is not a big deal, since he 'learned' how to do it in 'a couple of hours'. So where is it, Tommy? And by the way, since you've got so much free time on your tiny hands, why aren't you holding any meetings about how much money the city has been spending this year? Silly questions- true. It's obvious that Tommy would rather just increase fees and taxes while cutting back safety services instead of trying to manage the city's money in a responsible way.

But Head Wound Harry isn't the only member of Council with selective reasoning. Take Comrade Burnworth's comments today about the drive to kill the Milton Nuzum Memorial Shrine of Justice. From the same Dog Trainer story: "Burnworth also noted that the Development Advisory Board, created after the two-year moratorium on the project in 2001, recommended in October 2003 building a new justice center. 'They came up with a list of top 10 priorities,' he said. 'The second priority was a free-standing justice center.'" Hey Randall, didn't the DAB also say something about taking action on the Armory? Comrade Burnworth seems to be familiar with only the one recommendation of the DAB that will suit his flabby lawyer butt the most- a shiny new (terribly ugly) building for the world's second oldest profession.

But of course Comrade Burnworth is not the only elected official that is filled with justice center fever. As was noted earlier in the comments section, Council president Bertram is also hot and heavy- well, heavy anyway- to get the building built. He went to WTAP to claim a) Council has 'no control' over how money is spent and b) that insurance and floods have caused havoc with the city's finances. These are utter lies. The 'no control' myth is one that every member of Council seems eager to have believed for obvious reasons. For his comments about insurance and floods, Bertram deserves nothing but contempt. The city's financial 'crisis' was caused by huge cost overruns on the Aquatic Center and compounded by the fact that Council provided absolutely NO oversight of city spending during that time or since. (Which was also a cause of concern for state auditors and one that Head Wound Harry has yet to correct.) The cost overruns were then hidden away when Council, with the help of the anti-auditor, passed into law a budget that had a fictional source of income that amounted to 20% of the total. Until the charlatans now 'serving' the city admit that the city's money problems are rooted in mismanagement, nothing will be fixed. And until those charlatans make that admission, it is clear that they are not to be trusted at all in any matter.

Take the new pay raise insults for example. Two members of the administration who were responsible for coercing city employees into a pay freeze are now taking raises for themselves. Perhaps Scales will use his money to buy a house very far away. That would probably be best for him and the city. As for Sands, it's now clear he's not to be trusted either. Way to go, everyone. From an optimistic chance to change things, the Mullen administration has now collapsed completely into just another pack of bumbling crooks.

As for 'law director' Riggs taking the pay raise, yours truly asks why not? After all, he really did earn that money. Don't forget he is the executor of the Gutberlet estate, which is solely responsible for the city finishing last year in the black. Riggs not only brought that million dollars to city coffers in a very timely manner, he also let Council piss away half of it and lock up the other half of it so it's not used to save the Armory, just like Mrs. Gutberlet wanted. And besides, it's not like Roland has a job whereby people pay him for his time and encyclopedic knowledge of law.

How Low Will They Go?

2006-07-10T18:14:00.000-04:00

Late breaking news of the day:

"When former assistant safety service director Mike Scales receives his last pay from the City of Marietta, it will include compensation for a payraise retroactive to the beginning of January."

Hang on, dear readers, it gets worse. Scales isn't the only creep:

"In his official capacity, Scales was one member of the city administration responsible for the budget. As such, he recommended a pay freeze for all city employees, meaning that no one would receive an increase in pay until the city's finances were in better shape. However, upon his departure he requested his raise be paid in full from the start of this year. Likewise, Safety Service Director David Sands has requested his raise in pay, as did the City Law Director Roland W Riggs, III."

These revelations are in this WMOA story:
http://www.mariettaonline.com/news/news_detail.php?ID=5905

So it is that the fraud, deception, double-dealing and outright chicanery by certain members of city government continue unabated. Those members of the MPD who accepted the contract terms based on lies can't be feeling too happy about it. Members of the MFD are hereby cautioned against trusting any of these bastards.

PS- Because someone asked, here are the details of the tax budget meeting. What follows is directly from the city website:

"Subject: Special Council Meeting
Start Date: 07/13/2006
Start Time: 05:00 PM
End Time: 05:15 PM
Agenda: Resolution No. 31 (06-07) a Resolution to adopt the tax budget for the City of Marietta, Ohio, for the calendar year 2007, and to provide for submission of the same to the Auditor of Washington County, Ohio."

You read it right, dear readers, the blithering, lying, and scurrilous scalawags running this town intend to spend exactly fifteen (15) minutes on the entire 2007 tax budget. Really.

The Financial Wizardry of Vuukovich, adams and Mullen

2006-07-10T07:01:00.000-04:00

There were two points worth noting from last week's black Sabbath (a.k.a. regular Council meting): first, Tom "Head Wound Harry" Vukovic is not interested in 'fixing' the city's General Fund 'problem'; second, the anti-auditor and the Mayor already 'know' how city funds will look at the end of this year.

One new piece of legislation that was introduced Thursday was a measure that will transfer about $70,000 out of the water/sewer revenue funds into the General Fund. By law, that money should have been transferred back in 2004 but wasn't. Readers of this space may recall that state auditors cited the city for not obeying one of its own laws by not fully making such transfers. A few years ago, Council passed a law specifically designed to bring some measure of relief to the General Fund by drawing money from the water/sewer funds. (You may read about it by clicking right here. It is Citation number 10 from the 2005 state audit report. -Ed.) Because the anti-auditor didn't see the point in obeying the law and because the former chair of Council's finance committee was an utter fraud, the full amount was not transferred in 2004 or 2005.

Since state auditors have been poking around town, they apparently decided to remind "Head Wound Harry" that compliance with the law is a good idea. The legislation introduced Thursday mentions directly that state auditors want this done and have cited the city for the transgression. It is clear though that "Head Wound Harry" would rather not do what he was told and also would rather not help the General Fund. As has been noted here several times, every piece of legislation involving money transfers and/or the anti-auditor is usually pushed through in one reading. However, Vokovich allowed the legislation to transfer $70,000 that is lawfully 'owed' the General Fund to wait.

That's really worth pondering a moment- Council ignored every constituent that spoke against the bed tax increase in order to raise $70,000 a year. But when it comes to obeying their own laws and taking a very painless step to get $70,000 immediately, Council balked. There can be only two reasons for this- either Vokovich doesn't really want to 'solve' the General Fund problem, or there really isn't a problem after all.

So perhaps we can all rest easy now. After all, the city's tax budget for next year was introduced at Thursday's meeting. According to the legislation, the Mayor and the anti-auditor forged that golden document together and it projects the year-end balances of city accounts. Frankly it's difficult to know whether to laugh or cry at the thought of Moon Mullen and Sharon Adams putting their heads together and pouring over financial data to come up with the budget. However, it really is a legal document and must be based on something. Council will be holding a special meeting on the golden budget this week. Those who work for the city are strongly encouraged to go in order to see how Mullen and Adams and Council plan to screw you next.

Last though certainly not least, if you are a registered Marietta voter, make sure to stop by the CVB or the Chamber of Commerce to sign the petitions. Though the dreadful Daily Dog Trainer went to the trouble of running a story telling us all that the bed tax increase won't have any ill effects on tourism, and really isn't all that much money, the tax should still be defeated. The point isn't that anyone wants to save tourists a couple of bucks, the point is Council doesn't deserve any more money until they learn how to manage the money they already have. The same goes for 'mandatory filing'- it's not that anyone wants tax cheats to get away with it, it's that Council has no business nor any right to increase taxes when the city's problems aren't about having enough money. Remember- tax revenues for the city, including and especially income taxes, have been steadily going up all along. There is no revenue crisis. There is a management crisis and until it fixes itself, Council has no business picking anyone's pockets.

Ah but have no fear, gentle readers, for Jiggling Joe Matthews is ready to come riding back over the hill to save the day.

You Say You Want a Revolution...

2006-07-07T07:35:00.000-04:00

From a WMOA story:

"The Marietta Area Chamber of Commerce and the Marietta-Washington County Convention and Visitors Bureau have taken out paperwork to sponsor a ballot initiative to block enactment of the bed tax increase passed by Marietta City Council....

The petition must be turned in to the City Auditor no later than July 15th, then signatures verified by the board of elections in order to get the measure on the ballot.

If you're interested in signing the petition, they're available at the Chamber of Commerce Office or at the Convention and Visitor's Bureau."

Comments and observations about this week's regular Council meeting will appear this weekend in this space.

The Anti-Auditor Strikes Back

2006-06-26T06:44:00.000-04:00

Though there are newer, more pressing topics worth discussing, yours truly will start off with a look at a couple of the latest tricks developed by the city's anti-auditor and Councilperson 'Head Wound Harry' Vukovic to keep Marietta's financial management in the toilet. What it comes down to is that suddenly the anti-auditor and 'Head Wound Harry' are now claiming that the city's General Fund saw a nearly miraculous turnaround, going from "only $13,509 at the end of April" to "$369,805 as of May 31". Something to celebrate, no? Well, actually, no, it's not.

First off, it must be understood that this wondrous claim comes from the anti-auditor herself. For the past year or so, she has occasionally appeared in the pages of the Dog Trainer making various claims about the state of the General Fund. Moreover, the Daily Dog Trainer has repeatedly show itself to be easily duped or to be willing deceivers by unquestioningly printing the anti-auditor's tripe. We don't even have to look back too far for evidence of the collusion. Quoting now verbatim:

"Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - Time: 8:25:20 AM EST
City explores 2006 budget options
By Diana DeCola, ddecola@mariettatimes.com
Marietta officials learned Tuesday that the outlook for the city's general fund is not as bad as they thought three months ago. The current balance of the general fund is $335,436. The city started the year with a $1.2 million shortfall."

And

"Friday, March 24, 2006 - Time: 7:04:43 AM EST
Marietta general fund balance shows drastic slump
By Diana DeCola, Special to The News
As of Thursday, Marietta City Council reported the city's general fund balance to be $26,300.63, after all bills have been paid. The drastic slump in the general fund is why city council has decided to consider forecasting the city's budget."

Notice that it took exactly eight days for the General Fund to drop from more than $300,000 to $26,000. Readers of this space noticed it, but apparently the staff of the Marietta Times did not. Someone might have also noticed that the balance "as of May 31" is very close to the "current balance" as of March 15. Even the idiots at the Times should have noticed this. Something else worth noting is that financial forecasting has now been talked about and promised for months with no result. This is of course "Head Wound Harry's" fault.

Speaking of idiots, let's take a look at a new ploy being developed by "Head Wound Harry". At the last Black Sabbath (a.k.a. regular Council meeting), "Head Wound Harry" started talking about the city's "rainy day fund" and how "as more revenues come in, some should be dedicated" to the "rainy day fund". This is a complete sham. Never before has Vokovick talked about that "fund" or about the need to replenish it. So why is he doing so now? Because as it becomes more and more clear that the city doesn't have a problem with cash, but with cash management, Vookoovich and the anti-auditor will have to make it look as though there really isn't that much cash around. For example, let's just say the EMS billing takes in $600,000 this year instead of the $300,000 predicted. Instead of dedicating the extra money to the MFD or even safety-services in general, Vukuvick will say "Our 'rainy day fund' is still short, so we need to put that extra revenue in the fund." After all, when taxes on visitors are increased, old ladies aren't allowed to get away with all their yard sales profiteering tax-free, and a consulting firm in Columbus gives Council political cover to raise every fee in town, it's going to be come more and more difficult to claim that the General Fund is in bad shape. (Again- the only reason it's in bad shape is because a pack of crooked simpletons manage it.) That's why the announcement of the "positive news" of the General Fund balance was followed up quickly with new talk of a "rainy day fund" crisis.

Now on to the real positive news of the week: the petition drives to kill the Maximus fee study (a.k.a. political cover) and the bed tax increase. A few misunderstandings should be cleared up at the outset. First, the anti-auditor has very little to do with the actual process. She is in effect no more than a rubber stamp for the petitions on their way to the board of elections. In all seriousness, if she chooses to exercise her usual work standards (i.e., fudge up everything) then she will open herself up to a bevy of lawsuits that she can ill afford, mentally or financially. Secondly, even if the ballot initiative were to fail in the election, the tax increase and the fee increase study would be put on hold till at least the end of the year. By that time, those on Council will be nearing that magical one-year benchmark in office many are waiting for. Also, by going through all the trouble to get petition drives underway and succeed in getting the veto recalls on the ballot, a very clear and concise message will be sent to the Coven, reminding them whom they serve. Of vital import as well is the idea that by seeing these petitions through to the end, Citizens will be reminded that the final say in all government matters is in our hands, not the shabby frauds on Council.

Those preparing the petitions should be ready for what will be said about all this once the dreadful Times hears about it and decides to speak to the usual suspects (a.k.a. sources). The anti-auditor will likely talk about how much it will cost to have an election on the veto recall. "Head Wound Harry" will whine about how hard he's worked to make sure Marietta is financially solvent, how $70,000 of new bed tax money will be used "to continue to provide for safety services, to be used for parks and keeping things at a level we would all be proud of", how the bed tax idea came from the MFD (so don't blame Council), how the Maximus study is really needed, and finally he'll say a bit about how cranky his wife is about all this.

As jittery a time as it is for the elected fat heads in Marietta, it is also a critical time for the Citizens of our once fair town. Take a stand against the forces of stupidity and mendacity. Sign the petitions. Change the law. Change our town.

How to Kill the Bed Tax Increase

2006-06-22T06:45:00.000-04:00

Only 420 signatures are needed to really kill the bed tax increase and the Maximus study. Moreover, the procedure takes power out of Council's claws.

From WMOA today:

"If a city council overrides a mayor's veto, or if a mayor signs a piece of legislation, there is one other option allowing it to go before voters at the next election.

The procedure is found in Section 731.29 of the Ohio Revised Code. It allows for a petition that must be signed by 10% of the number of people who voted in the most recent general election for governor. Those signatures must be gathered within 30 days of date of the override or the date of the mayor's signature.

According to the Washington County Board of Elections, 4,199 people within the city of Marietta voted in the 2002 gubernatorial election.

That petition is then submitted to the city auditor, who after ten days--but not later than the 75th day prior the election, shall submit a certified copy of the text of the legislation to the county board of elections, along with the petition.

Within 10 days after the petition is submitted to the board of elections, they will verify if there are enough valid signatures on the petition to place the measure before the full electorate.

If it qualifies for the ballot, the measure would then not go into effect until approved by a majority of those who vote on it at the next election."

All that's needed is 420 signatures to stop the bed tax increase and the Maximus study. Citizens would then be given a chance to vote on those two proposals in the fall. Let the signature gathering begin.

Why Tar and Feathers Never Go Out of Style

2006-06-19T08:04:00.000-04:00

For those who’ve not been paying attention to city Council, last week’s regular meeting might have been a surprise. Sadly though, to most people, last week’s meeting was just a confirmation of some ugly truths. Here’s a short but by no means complete list of observations made:

1. Most of the members of city Council don’t give a fig what their constituents want. Every merchant group, many Citizens, businesspersons and sober people urged Council not to raise the bed tax. Council raised the tax anyway. This is also why the justice center project is being kept alive. Most of the Council wants the project even though their constituents don’t. Thus we know it will likely happen.

2. Members of city Council lie to the public. This one shouldn’t be too much of a surprise. The most pristine example of this from last week is Cathy Shively’s outright lie that members of city Council haven’t received any pay raises "for years".

3. Members of city Council do not believe rules apply to them. Judy Wray is a really fine example of this in general. More specifically we can turn back to everyone’s favorite brownshirt, Cathy Shively. Shively decided the rules didn’t apply to her, choosing to lie and deflect criticism after a Citizen righteously laid out Council’s past bad behavior. Even though the rules of Council meetings are supposed to prevent it, Shively was allowed out of turn to drone on and on and lie on and on. City Council ‘President’ Bertram was unable and/or unwilling to stop Shively. Even though it was pointed out to ‘President’ Chaos and the brownshirt that it wasn’t the time to respond, the brownshirt went on doing so anyway.

4. Members of city Council intend to squeeze everyone in town to pay for the 2005 budget fraud. Let’s step back here a moment so we know we’re clear: Most current members of city Council approved a 2005 budget for the General Fund that was 20 percent fiction. That’s $2,000,000. That fake money was inserted into the 2005 budget most probably to cover up the gigantic cost overruns associated with the Aquatic Center project, which was undertaken in 2004. Thanks to state auditors we know that city Council did not (and still has not) held ANY meetings to discuss how much money the city spends. So during the time that the city was spending huge gobs of money on the cement pond, no one was watching to make sure that too much wasn’t being spent. That’s why and how the pool ended up costing nearly $2,000,000 more than projected. So it came to pass that Art Fordham and the anti-auditor Sharon Adams decided to slip 2,000,000 fake dollars into the budget to help cover up the fact. Then they conned everyone in town into thinking that the General Fund had ‘suddenly’ become sickly and blamed it on overtime costs, utilities and Mayor Mullen. In other words, they blamed everyone else for the problem and took it out on everyone else. Now, mostly the same bunch of cowards and liars is squeezing every penny they can from everyone. This includes cracking down on those wily old ladies who hold yard sales in order to sock away vast amounts of wealth from the coffers of the Marietta tax department. Note to the brownshirt and Mayor Cornpone: we all understand ‘mandatory filing’ is not a tax increase but just your latest attempt to ‘increase enforcement’. If there’s one thing that is consistently overheard in Marietta, it’s more people wanting more old ladies to cough up their yard sale money. Those grey panthers have simply been getting away with it for too long. Maybe we could also initiate ‘increased enforcement’ on other menaces like unconcerned delivery drivers who routinely double park, jeopardizing traffic safety and uglifying our town. (See observation 3.)

5. Members of city Council expect a lot for their money. In addition to blaming the bed tax increase on the fire department (without, of course, earmarking any of the money for the MFD), Tom "Head Wound Harry" Vukovich said this about the whopping $70,000 the tax increase is supposed to yield: "[T]his should be used to continue to provide for safety services, to be used for parks and keeping things at a level we would all be proud of." Actually, Head Wound, we’re all pretty pissed off about the level of safety services, especially since Council is more willing to spend money on a new building no one wants while depriving the MFD of the hundreds of thousands of dollars in new revenue they’re bringing into the city. Besides, you cracker, you already spent half of that 70K on paying a group of out-of-towners to tell you it’s okay to raise fees.

Speaking of paying out-of-towners, Head Wound Harry made a lot more hey about how silly it was to pay for a performance audit, since they only amount to ‘political cover’. However, political cover is EXACTLY what Council wants from the Maximus study on raising city fees, because the bed tax excuse (‘We’re only increasing taxes on those foolish enough to visit our once fair town, not on those foolish enough to live here.’) won’t work. Council is looking for political cover to raise all the fees that residents pay. Another thing about performance audits: Head Wound whined on and on that he’d been unable, in all his wisdom, to find anyone who spoke well about them. It was the finance chair of Jackson’s city Council that told Head Wound it was all for ‘cover’. (Someone in the ‘legitimate media should call that person just to see how they respond to Vukovich’s claim.) Then Vokovick said that he’d been unable to reach anyone at all in the town of Warren and they’ve had more than one performance audit. Let’s look at this story about the performance audits in Warren: "A performance audit of several Warren, Ohio, operations issued today by Ohio Auditor of State Jim Petro sets forth 101 recommendations for improvement that could save $140,650 annually, enhance operating efficiencies and create additional revenues of $861,000 a year." Pretty useless, huh? How about this: "The budget process also should have more community involvement, and funding should be directly tied to specific goals. A five-year forecast should be developed to give the community and city managers a better understanding of financial issues. Increasing the use of direct deposit among employees, Petro says, could save $9,000 per year; and by diversifying the city's investment portfolio to include other investment instruments, the city could increase investment revenue by an estimated $50,000." Does that mean Warren doesn’t just buy piles and piles of certificates of deposit? Very exciting. Last but not least, there’s this: "In the Finance Department, financial reporting ‘should be improved to increase accountability to citizens,’ the report states. In May 2001, city voters approved an [sic] 0.5% income tax increase, which was promised for public safety services. ‘The city has not yet specifically outlined how that money will be allocated and spent," the report states.’" Perhaps now we have a better idea why Vookovick is so dead set against a performance audit. Perhaps we also have a pretty good idea why a recall sounds better and better.

Finally, a bit about the comments from yours truly regarding copies of ‘Mariettawatch’ being forbidden at the Aquatic Center. That was of course a joke, but the reality is much worse. Fitness model and management guru Donna Medley has instructed teenagers to thoroughly search every bag in order to confiscate food. While the claim is that this is a ‘safety’ matter, Medley’s real purpose it clear: to force pool patrons to spend most of their time at the center standing in line for overpriced snack bar food. No, really, that’s why. As has been said before, your humble narrator has little need to make stuff up for this space.

Bleeding a Turnip

2006-06-12T06:43:00.000-04:00

How does the Coven of Cowards plan to correct budget frauds and office-holding frauds?

"Income generated from yard sales, mowing lawns or any other type of paid activities, no matter how small the revenue, would have to be reported to the city tax office, according to a proposal discussed by Marietta City Council's finance committee on Thursday." - from the Dog Trainer

"Council members Kathy Shively, D-At large, and Judy Wray, D-3rd Ward, who voted for the [transient] tax increase, said the presentation was informative. But neither woman said the meeting had changed her mind." - ibid.

"The current fine structure would also change, increasing penalties for parking violations." -WMOA

"Mullen said within the next 30 days, the administration will be employing a consultant to study the cost of maintaining the city right of way. He confirmed that a sidewalk component may be in the coming ordinance, but said he did not expect the merchants to have to pay a fee for the lease of the sidewalk space." -WMOA (Does anyone believe that Mullen can speak for the intentions of Council, especially the Brownshirt and Head Wound Harry?)

Perhaps the Coven will just charge merchants a group rate for the merchants and artists walks. After all, the sidewalks are so crowded and there's so much merchandise on the sidewalks, it's clear that such circumstances can't be allowed to go on higgly-piggly. More importantly, we can't allow merchants to prosper without making damn sure that the Coven and the anti-auditor get some of that money.

So- squeeze a few pennies out of yard sales, increase a tax that no Citizen has spoken of favorably, triple or quadruple parking fines, and charge merchants for the privilege of using sidewalks and that's how Marietta's money management crimes will be rectified.

Unfortunately, no amount of rectal work can fix what's wrong with the Mayor. Hearken to this passage from the Dog Trainer: "Vukovic also asked Mullen if he supported mandatory filing. 'I will wait to hear from the public,' he said. 'If 51 percent says they want this, then I will support it.'" Thus we have the essence of Mullen's 'leadership': flop and flay helplessly, squirm and equivocate until someone tells him what to think and do.

For those who harbor doubts that the staff of Dog Trainer has motivations other than providing timely and accurate information, your humble narrator now revisits the EMS billing stories. Recall that the Dog Trainer ran a very prominent story about them last weekend. The story contained inaccurate information provided by the anti-auditor. This bad info was corrected a day later by WMOA. It was corrected in the Dog Trainer a week later, in a few small paragraphs at the end of the 'around town' section. This was after the Times' original story admitted the accurate number would be available on Monday. By tucking away the real, accurate information after having given prominence to the false anti-auditor information, the Times proved yet again that their agenda has little to do with truth.

The Augean Stables

2006-06-05T07:22:00.000-04:00

(Please note this post was updated Tuesday in regards to the MFD EMS fees. -Ed.)

Your truly knows full well that cleaning out the stable is never really done. With that in mind, here is some remaining fodder from recent developments in our once fair town.

Those readers who own businesses in town and make use of the sidewalk for business, beware the right-of-way legislation. Two media outlets have covered this bit of malice, but not completely. The real scheme behind this legislation is to replace the "sidewalk use fee" by which the city has been collecting money for years without a law on the books to do so. Both the WMOA story and the Times version focus on how the proposed law is a way "to recover the costs of maintaining their right-of-way from utility companies." While that’s true as far as it goes, Councilpersons Tom "Head Wound Harry" Vukovic and Kathy Shively want to also use the right-of-way legislation to charge merchants for the use of sidewalks. Yes, it’s as business-friendly as it is a great way to pump more cash into the desolate general fund. And even better, no one’s talking about the real scheme. Way to go, Coven.

Speaking of pouring more wasted cash into the General Fund, the Times saw fit to search out the anti-auditor’s cave, spider hole, padded room, or wherever she’s been hiding. Once the crackerjack reporter had the anti-auditor, did she ask about how many hours per week Adams is devoting to the job? No. Did the ‘reporter’ ask Adams how things were faring with the CDBG money? Nope. Did the ‘reporter’ query Adams about what state auditors have been asking regarding the 2005 multi-million dollar budget fraud? Hells no. Instead, the ‘reporter’ asked the anti-auditor about EMS billing receipts. Mind you, Adams has been repeatedly shown to be pathologically unable to provide accurate financial information of any kind whatsoever. Then there’s the anti-auditor’s demented hatred of the Marietta Fire Department. So obviously Adams is worth quoting on the subject of the MFD’s cash-generating ability.

Actually, Adams’s putrid comments in the Times story are worth recounting. They should strike fear in the hearts of even the least sober reader: "City Auditor Sharon Adams said the $77,500 number has not been confirmed by her office. 'That is not official,' she said Friday. Adams reported the amount at $46,540. She said her calculations, which are the only official ones, only account for revenue reported up to the end of April. The balance for May will not be available until Monday." What we have here is yet another example of Adams’s numbers not matching anyone else’s numbers. We also have petty bitchiness- "her calculations, which are the only official ones"- and so on. The problem is her ‘calculations’, done one may presume on papyrus, just like how she was taught, have been judged to be unreliable by state auditors. How about her calculations for the 2005 General Fund budget? After all, Adams certified that budget, and that was an official certification. But of course these are pointless questions. Not only because no Times ‘reporter’ will never ask them, but because Adams is saying just what Council wants her to say in this EMS billing situation.

(On Monday, WMOA revealed that Adams's number for the EMS billing was wrong. Here is most of the story: "Posted on: 06/05/06 at 3:53pm- Today Marietta’s Acting Fire Chief Dan Benson received an update from the department’s billing company on EMS revenues. As of May 31, a total of $83,225 had been received as the result of third party billing. That means the fire department will likely exceed their projection of $200,000 for the year.")

Should the EMS billing revenues meet or even exceed the forecasts, then Council will have to contend with people having the silly idea that the EMS money should go back to the fire department, you know- the ones who earned it. Witness this passage from the same Times story: "While city employees and officials remain pleased with the results so far, the question of what should be done with the revenue is still unresolved. Benson said he is hoping to be able to hire more firefighters soon. Councilman Andy Thompson, R-at large, a member of council’s finance committee, said the general fund is more of a priority to council right now, though." That’s just what Adams, Vukovic and Fordham wanted to hear. By the way, since it’s now June (FYI elected officials: that’s halfway through the year), some might have thought that the Coven and the administration would have a handle on the 2006 finances. Those people haven’t lived in Marietta long enough to know better.

Hey- remember how gung-ho Mayor Doodle was for the MFD when he was running for his current seat? Understandable if you don’t: "Mayor Michael Mullen said while he supports hiring more firefighters, he understands city council’s position. 'When the third-party billing legislation was put in place, it was not specific as to how it would be expended,' Mullen said." Actually, Doodle, you spineless little twit, Council repeatedly reassured irate Citizens that they intended to use the money for the MFD. Granted, no one believed Council any more than they believe Mullen, but let’s not pretend that Council didn’t pretend. Vukovich’s male muse, mentor and object of tender devotion, Art Fordham, was the only one who didn’t pretend. He said as little as possible about where the EMS money would go. He even went so far as to stifle a WTAP camera instead of answering a question about the MFD. Yes, Fordham most probably authored the $2,000,000 2005 budget fraud, but at least the bastard didn’t lie about his intentions towards the EMS money. Mayor Doodle on the other hand has now done just that.

Last and least, a warning to those of you who like to carry printed copies of this blog with you about town: do NOT take them with you to the Aquatic Center. Fitness model and city recreation director Donna Medley recently said in the Times: "We should also remind patrons that we’ll be stepping up our search of bags carried into the pool." Dear readers, please don’t take a chance and don’t take your copies of MariettaWatch to the Aquatic Center. But if Medley catches one of you, before she throws you into a gulag, ask her exactly when she realized that the pool’s "chemical injection system" had to be calibrated before the pool could open. Better yet, maybe you could ask her if she had ever planned on opening the pool Memorial Day weekend. And, since she hasn’t yet, does she ever plan on opening the pool Memorial Day? Anyway, those are just some questions you could ask Medley, since the dreadful Times didn’t see fit to do so. This weekend’s editorial spew about how the pool should be better managed is nothing more than bitching about issues not brought up at all in the article. Note also how the Times did not ask if new oversight has been installed to better manage the pool’s cash. State auditors cited the city for how poorly it has been done in the past, saying that theft would be easy. Yours truly suggests it would be very easy for a public employee to scoop up large piles of pool cash without anyone knowing for sure at all if it had been done and how much was stolen, including state auditors. That’s how easy it would be. (For a detailed look at the state auditors' concern in this area, click here to read about it. It's 'Recommendation' number 15 from the 2004 state audit management letter. -Ed.) But that’s also how public business is conducted here in Marietta, where awful government resides.

Balancing the Scales

2006-05-30T10:34:00.000-04:00

Since your humble narrator chose to return upon the subject of Marietta's wretched anti-auditor, that's as good a place as any to begin again. Apart from occasionally spewing out random numbers to represent the balance of the General Fund, what else has she been up to? Well, she chose to disagree with state and federal officials regarding the city's CDBG money and their approved plan for stop gap measures. Those measures would have allowed the city to fund projects intended to benefit low-income Citizens. Because the anti-auditor chose to deny the expertise of the feds (sounds familiar, no?), those projects are now on hold while other moneys will be used to fund street lighting projects nearer to the cockles of certain members of city Council.

Apart from preventing city business going forward and her worthless pronouncements as to the state of city finances, Adams has evidently retreated back into the darkness whence she came. Now only the lure of causing mischief and consternation brings her back onto Putnam Street. And let's not forget a paycheck in that list. Still, even in all her wretchedness she has some joys. Take the most recent Black Sabbath (a.k.a. regular Council meeting), during which the Coven voted down a proposal to invite state auditors in to have another look around the place and the Coven voted to increase and redistribute the hotel tax, thereby sending even more money into the pit of despair known as the General Fund.

If there was one dark cloud in the anti-auditor's week, it was that assistant safety-service director Mike Scales quit the Mullen administration. Some may think that Scales' loss would be a 'victory' for Adams and Councilman Tom 'Head Wound Harry' Vukovich. Your humble narrator sees it differently. Since Mullen came to office, Scales has time and again been a patsy for those working against the Mayor. Scales was the Mayor's representative in drawing up the now infamous and criminal 2005 city budget. Scales was too scheming or too trusting or too apathetic or too unburdened by intelligence to catch a completely fictitious $2,000,000 source of revenue invented by Adams and Art Fordham, disgraced former Councilman. Scales was also a patsy for Adams and Fordham when it came to the 2006 budget. Now that Scales is gone, Mayor Mullen may actually hire someone with brains and ability enough to see through the frauds the anti-auditor and Council are still perpetrating. (Note that word 'may' there.) Such a chance, however slim, must not comfort the anti-auditor.

"Whoa, Professor, there you go again," some may be saying. "What kinds of frauds is Council getting away with? They didn't even get away with the Justice Center/Parking free-for-all scheme." Before getting into other areas that Council is betraying those who elected them, let's look a bit closer at that vote on the Milton Nuzum Commemorative Shrine of Justice. The final vote on the repeal of parking ordinances (solely for the purpose of allowing the Justice Center project to advance) was stopped by exactly two votes. Given that we know the President of Council is also strongly in favor of said project, it's safe to say that a vast and strong majority of the Coven is for it. Yours truly calls it a strong majority for because the two against are Judy Wray and Andy Thompson. Say and think what you will about either and both of them, they are not consensus builders. Neither of them is going to 'reason' with fellow Covenites Shively, Burnwoth or Vucovich. Therefore the Justice Shrine project is still very much alive- voters, merchants, and cost be damned.

It's not as though we don't have ample proof that Council will ignore the clear and stated preference of those whom they allegedly represent. Take for example that vote on the hotel tax. As your humble narrator recalls, there were exactly six people in town that thought it was a good idea. Five of them are on Council and one is supposed to be the city auditor. The Chamber of Commerce, the Visitor's Bureau, merchants and Citizens were all against the idea and clearly stated so in Council committee meetings as they've been directed to do. And yet in the end, their collective 'No!' was unheeded by the Coven. All because the Coven wants a few more pennies to pour into the still mismanaged General Fund.

Ah, but they'll get more than pennies once the over-paid out-of-town consultants from up yonder in the big shiny capitol city say it's okay to jack up all fees in town. For while the Coven nixed the idea of paying state auditors, they approved the idea of paying a 'consulting' firm to tell Marietta it's okay to raise fees. Naturally, this idea was highly praised by the alleged lawyer on Council. It was also well spoken of by Head Wound Harry Vokovich. By doing so, those who watched the last Black Sabbath (a.k.a. regular Council meeting) learned that Vukovich is a dancer as well as poet. That's because after he whined and furrowed his brows (so everyone knew he was really concerned) about not having enough money on hand to pay for state auditors, he waltzed completely around the subject of money to pay for the consultants. Comrade Burnworth did a similar dance because he had complained about paying for useless studies.

The real difference of course is that the state auditors were Mayor Mullen's idea and consultants were not. Money and support for Mullen's ideas never seem to quite materialize on Council but money and support for non-Mullen proposals are quick and easy to come by. In the case of auditors versus consultants, it's the Citizens of Marietta who lose out in the end, as usual. The consultants' 'study' is intended as nothing more than a cover to drastically increase as many city fees as possible. This is utterly damnable since it has been demonstrated that Marietta's money problems are not a lack of cash, but a lack of proper or even sensible management. Throwing more money into the hands of this pack of charlatans will not solve the problem.

Last and least, we come to the matter of your humble narrator's return. To spoil the speculation, the real catalyst was the departure of Scales. His egress from city government is the first real opportunity for changing our once fair town's fortunes since last year's election. Time and again those who vote in Marietta have shown lapses in judgment. The vote earlier this month to consign Marietta to a slapdash scheme for providing natural gas is merely the latest addition to that list. (However, it was pretty funny to read in the pages of the Daily Disappointment that Council's lone 'Republican' thinks the semi-Socialist scheme is a good one. Chalk that up as further evidence of how dreadful Ohio Republicans are.) But Scales' fleeing wasn't up to the voters; he finally couldn't take it and now the Mayor has to make a choice. (His tantrum [storming out of the Black Sabbath] also gave lie to the repeated statements of Vokovich and others that Council and the administration have been working well together.)

Unlike his surrender on the pretense of having a Development Director, Mullen cannot survive his few remaining months in office without an assistant safety-service director. Hearken back to earlier words of yours truly who has repeatedly pointed out that Mullen in no way whatsoever could have been responsible for the 2005 budget and adjoining fraud. There is absolutely no way Mullen had the brains or the balls to cook up something so audacious as a fraudulent source of income for one-fifth of the entire General Fund budget for that year. (That's 20 percent for the living dead known as Times reporters.) Those who've had the questionable pleasure of watching Mullen try to understand or explain anything more complex than a button know he couldn't have pulled off that fraud and he sure as Hell can't come to grips with Marietta's financial mess. He might, just might, get lucky and hire someone who can.

As for your humble narrator, if events warrant, further postings will follow. (And no, picking on the ever-rotting Times doesn't count.)

Our Opinion: [Anti-Auditor's] case shows public needs to be in the know

2006-05-27T08:30:00.000-04:00

"There may not be anything illegal about an elected official out of the office for six months, but it's a situation that's left us with a bad taste in our mouths.

[Marietta city anti-auditor Sharon Adams] has had a string of bad luck it seems. [Ongoing, undisclosed and chronic illnesses, "misunderstandings" with credit card companies, "misunderstandings" with state auditors, the rising cost of gazelle blood injections and so on.] What it means is [Adams] hasn't been in the office but once in the last six months, and it may be months before she returns full time on a regular basis. And during it all, she continues to collect a salary of about $50,000 a year.

The law says that as long as she documents this absence adequately, it's OK. But we think voters may have another idea. When they elect someone to office, they expect that person to be there, week in and week out. [Adams] says she's doing some work from home, but we think that isn't what voters put her in office to do.

We think [Adams] needs to do what she can to get back in her office, at least on a part-time basis, as soon as possible. Her oversight as the elected official is needed. Not long ago, [it was disclosed that Adams was a co-conspirator in a $2,000,000 fraud]. That's not something that happens normally, and it happened prior to [Adams]'s extended absence. Still, when the person in charge isn't around certain aspects of the job aren't getting the attention they need.

We also think it's time more voters knew that the Ohio Revised Code allows for a public official to be in the office just four times a year, or every 90 days. We are willing to bet most people don't realize that. If that's something voters are concerned about, they should take steps to address the issue with their legislators. It would seem some sort of work record, like a time card or time sheet, would be in order for public officials, but it isn't required. Their salaries are paid by taxpayers [sic]. We think even public officials should be accountable for the hours they work.

[Adams] may have just had a run of bad luck. But we think her situation points to the bigger issue of elected officials who are allowed to be absent without consequence on a long-term basis. Voters need to know when such a situation occurs, and need to take action if it's a part of the law they'd like to see changed."

[Editor's note- This column was lifted [almost] verbatim from today's screed in the Daily Dog Trainer [a.k.a. the Marietta times]. Those who are morbidly interested in the original may click here to see it. Yes, this post does portend the Return of the Professor. A full-length original tableau of spun gold from PC will appear in this space anon.]

Revenge of the Bike Path

2006-04-23T09:34:00.000-04:00

Does anyone in town believe that Mayor Mullen’s ‘idea’ for extending the bike path was a spur of the moment occasion? Council is once again being forced to consider one of Mullen’s ‘ideas’ at the last possible moment. The Mayor is asking to apply for a state grant to further his project along. Unfortunately, the hour is late, as the deadline for grant applications is very soon. If all this sounds familiar, that’s because Mullen did this very same thing last year, and for the very same state grant. For those who’ve guessed, give yourselves a pat on the back. The state grant Mullen is proposing to utilize for the bike path extension is the very same grant he wanted to use last year for the ‘rebricking’ of Front Street.

As he’s doing this year, Mullen made his proposal to Council so close to application deadline last year, that the Coven was given limited opportunity to debate and decimate the proposal. They killed it in the end, and just as well, since Mullen seems to have given up on the entire concept in favor of extending the bike path. Next year, one may presume Mullen’s last minute idea will include shiny red balloons, rainbows, pixies, or whatever else manages to grab his fancy in April of 2007.

Speaking of imaginary creatures, Marietta’s anti-auditor has been making appearances about town, except at Council committee meetings. Reports conflict as to whether she most resembles a ghoul or ghost. What’s undoubted is that she’s been holding up important city business. Well, maybe she doesn’t consider paying bills and insuring that the city receives over half a million federal dollars important. She evidently does not, which is why the city is still waiting for that money and others are waiting for city money. Actually, the city is waiting for money because the anti-auditor chose to disagree with federal officials about the city’s finances. Weird, huh? Not really- not in our once fair town, where the anti-auditor is so confident in her abilities that she sees fit to ignore state and federal auditors and other officials as to how she should be conducting her job. The latest proof of this tendency was tucked away in Thursday’s Black Sabbath (a.k.a. Council meeting) and mostly or completely unreported by the casual media.

On Thursday evening, Council created two (2) brand new city accounts for money received towards specific federal programs. From Head Wound Harry Vukovic’s comments, one might think that the anti-auditor and the Coven took charge to separate out that money from other accounts to keep the city’s administration (a.k.a. Mullen’s staff) from messing things up. In fact what happened was that state auditors made the anti-auditor and Council take these steps because the anti-auditor has been keeping very very sloppy books and the new accounts will help state officials track some money better. The anti-auditor should have created these accounts a long time ago, but didn’t until she was made to (those wanting proof can browse through the 2003 state audit of the city and page 64 in particular). Interesting that Vukovic chose to not mention any of that Thursday. Wait- not, ‘interesting’- ‘very telling’.

Of course the anti-auditor and her enablers on Council were also busy creating other mischief this week. "Consider how much trouble existed with the [2006] CDBG budget and also the course of that trouble. Problems began when the development department and the Auditor disagreed over the account balances. Those troubles persisted until the Auditor was forced to admit she was wrong. Had the chair of city Council's finance committee had his way, the false numbers originally provided by the Auditor would have been used and nothing more would have been said. Change only came because someone in the administration was sharp enough to see the Auditor's mistake and tough enough to insist that both the Auditor and councilman were wrong. But with the rest of the city budget, not a peep was heard from the Auditor or Council committee chair or the administration. Yours truly suspects that the rest of the budget was passed so easily because no one was smart enough to catch mistakes or was as willing to shout about them as the development department." Sorry- there’s no plagiarism like self-plagiarism. Those words were originally written by yours truly on February 8 of last year in a post called "Marietta's City Auditor in 2003- A Tradition of Incompetence Continued". While that passage may answer the question about why your humble narrator isn’t posting that often these days, it begs the question about why these shenanigans have been allowed to continue unabated and unimpeded.

In fact, yours truly suspected that the rest of the 2005 "budget was passed so easily because no one was smart enough to catch mistakes or was as willing to shout about them as the development department." A few weeks earlier, your humble narrator stated the heart of the awful truth about that budget: "THE REASON THE [2005] NON-CDBG BUDGET WAS PASSED WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A PEEP FROM COUNCIL IS THAT IT’S ACTUALLY A MINEFIELD THAT WILL KEEP EXPLODING UNDER MAYOR MOONIE’S FEET ALL YEAR. And AAS Adams and Artless [Fordham] are going to do their utmost to see that it is such." And lo, such things came to pass upon our once fair town.

But maybe ‘minefield’ wasn’t the best choice of words (those being from Google’s favorite post in this space, "Mayor Milquetoast"). Instead, the 2005 city budget was one single bunker-busting bomb, in the guise of a $2,000,000 fraud. That bomb was defused by the Gutberlet gift of more than a million dollars. Meanwhile, stealing quotes from past posts could go on and on and still be mostly applicable to the troubles plaguing Marietta now, a year later. Those still in a nostalgic mood are invited to revisit "The Abominable Auditor Sharon Adams- A Look Back" from January of last year, discussing plenty of past perfidy by the anti-auditor involving inheritance taxes, her alleged ‘educational’ background in hotel management and other lowlights.

Enough of the ghostly anti-auditor. Way more than, really. Just so everyone doesn’t think yours truly is always negative, here are some words of positive advice to the Marietta Times. When you all huddle together in the swamp of Channel Lane, tasking your minds as to why your advertisers and readers are flocking away, consider the letter published this past Friday entitled "Some people need to read up on doctrines". Said letter, allegedly written by a grown person, attacked certain Christians and a certain Times advertiser. For newspapers that want to succeed, an example of a bad idea is giving readers and advertisers the impression that you’re willing to print barely literate assaults on them in the opinion section. (See? Positive and constructive.) And here’s one more friendly tip: you should update your "public officials" page every three or four years, just to be safe.

Head Wound Harry, on the other hand, needs some lessons in being friendly. During Thursday’s Council meeting, during his end comments, Head Wound interrupted Judy Wray, saying, "This is my time." It was Vukovic’s time, but how could he be so heartless as to cut off a fellow educator and servant of the people? After all, Judy Wray is just looking out for Marietta the same way she looks- sorry, looked- after her students. But no, mean old Head Wound had to cut her off. Shocking really.

Not shocking was Cathy (<--- intentional) Shively’s plea for those opposed to the performance audit, the bike path extension, the fact that Mayor Mullen uses up so much damned oxygen every day, to call her. Yours truly suggests that those who support the audit, bike path or want to talk about how much oxygen and money are wasted by the anti-auditor call Cathy (373-8430) as well.

Again- not wanting to be such a negative Nelly all the time, yours truly now chooses to close out this post by exercising the Times version of being "balanced". That is, quote some dimwit who disagrees. So- on Thursday evening, Junior Nolan said he thinks that Head Wound Harry "has did a good job." And Junior’s absolutely right. Vukovic "has did a good job" indeed.

The Wrong Path

2006-04-17T06:54:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, it's been yet another week when the most vexing question isn't 'What to write about' but 'Where to start?' Also as usual, your humble narrator chooses to start at the bottom.

There was a lot of noise about Mayor Mullen's latest scheme to extend the city's bike path. There's a lot that could be written about Mullen's decision to propose spending more money on a bike path just after conning the police department into a wage freeze, when the general fund is being kept anemic, and when the city's Community Development Block Grant is in jeopardy (more about that below), but the most egregious detail of this scheme is how to pay for it. The pitiful truth is that Mullen plans to use money intended for Americans with Disabilities Act-related projects. Yes, Mullen really intends to spend money meant to assist disabled people on the bike bath. Revolting as that is, it's no surprise. A quick check of recent history shows that the only thing Mullen has done or even proposed to do to help that segment of our population is to form a committee to look into ways to help that segment of our population. Even Joe Matthews had a better record of getting ADA-related projects done.

Not content to offend the living, Mullen went that extra mile to insult the dead. From the WMOA story about the bike path: "'That $238,000 [the city's projected cost for the bike path] could be divided between some street funds, as the Post Street area is obviously a street-related function,' Mullen says. 'It could be some Community Development Block Grant Funds, for ADA-accessible purposes in sections. But, my recommendation--the administration's recommendation--is that this would be a very good (use for the) Gutberlet Bequest Fund.'" Earth to Moon: the Gutberlet money is long gone. But Milquetoast isn't the only elected cretin spreading that falsehood.

Here's an extended excerpt from the dreadful Marietta Times version of this story: "The mayor suggests using money from the Emma Gutberlet trust - funds City Council specifically earmarked for these kinds of capital improvement projects. Council finance committee chairman [Head Wound Harry] Vukovic has some concerns, however. Vukovic said that money, currently sitting in the general fund, is keeping that fund afloat for now and he can't say for sure when it might be safe to use it." Now read this sentence from another Times story that ran the VERY SAME DAY: "As of the end of the day today, the general fund will stand at $144,542." Those who don't work on Channel Lane will recognize immediately the problem. If the Gutberlet money, well over $500,000, is "currently sitting in the general fund" how could that fund have less than half that amount in it as of Thursday? The obvious answer (again- only for those who don't work for the Times) is that it can't. The portion of the Gutberlet money left in the general fund has long since evaporated. Vukovic has said so himself.

"But Professor," some are likely saying at this point, "Council passed a resolution saying that they were going to 'repay' the Gutberlet money and use it for capital projects. So surely they will, whether for the bike path or not." It's true Council did pass such a resolution, but there are two distinct problems with that scenario: Council has to find or 'make' the money in the first place and secondly, Council has a rich history of ignoring its own laws, especially when it comes to money. For the stated plan of Council to work, the city would have to generate enough money to fix all the financial shenanigans it has helped generate, keep greasing the wheels oaf the justice center project (clearly currently happening) and then still have more than $500,000 left to spend on a capital project everyone can agree on. Then a fleet of red white and blue pigs will fly in a "V" formation over downtown to celebrate. Don't forget, Council ignored its law that would have meant several hundred thousand dollars more in the general fund.

Here's another piece of fiction that should be deflated: just because the 'general fund' has '$144,542' in it, that's not all that Marietta has in the bank. And no, yours truly isn't referring to CD's or the water and sewer money. It turns out that the anti-auditor has crafted the city finances into essentially just one or two great big piles of cash. Think of it this way: the city has one giant account that is split into different funds. It would be like splitting one checking account into different funds for alligator shoes, good fake Italian shoes, bad fake Italian shoes, shoes of unnatural colors, shoes way too young for one's age, and so on. Just because there's no money in the 'unnatural color' fund doesn't mean there's no money at all. So it is with the city's general fund. Besides, any and all statements about Marietta's finances that come from the anti-auditor and/or Head Wound Harry are worthless.

Speaking of which, there are a lot of wild rumors flying around about the anti-auditor these days. Here's what yours truly has been able to discover: the anti-auditor spends something around an hour or two at best per day at 'work'- mostly true; Adams has shaved her head completely to protest her legal difficulties- false; Adams is currently receiving injections of gazelle blood from an unnamed Algerian 'doctor'- still unknown; Adams is preventing the city's Community Development Block Grant from going forward- true.

Readers of this space will recall a post entitled not-so-coincidentally 'The Anti-Auditor' and dated two weeks ago. Here's a quote from it: "To summarize while Adams is not discharging her duties, the receipt of some half a million dollars from the federal government will have to wait." Those comments were in reference to a WMOA story with this line: "The City of Marietta traditionally receives its annual CDBG entitlement of around $500,000 in March or April of each year. However, the entitlement cannot be paid out until a budget has been approved by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development. Following Adams's return and approval, council is expected to hold a special meeting to pass the CDBG budget." But Adams hasn't returned yet, or at least hasn't returned enough to do her job. Witness the latest WMOA story on this topic about a memo "regarding the 'urgent status' of the City of Marietta's Community Development Block Grant fund. In the correspondence, it is revealed that all of the city's housing programs are on hold and the roughly $450,000 in entitlement dollars typically received by March or April of each year are not expected before June 16." Once Council figures out this means that certain pet projects won't get done (streetlights come to mind again for some reason), then they may finally start taking the anti-auditor's malfeasance a bit more seriously. Note your humble narrator wrote 'may' there.

"But hey Professor," some might opine, "Council is preparing to go ahead with the performance audit and pay some whiz-bang out-of-towners to do some forecasting. Doesn't that mean they're getting serious about the money?" Your humble narrator reminds readers that Council hasn't done anything yet. Remember- this group of persons always finds a way to NOT do something in the end. The audits have to make it through three readings yet before they will officially begin to take place. That's a long row to yet hoe. Just don't be surprised if they don't happen. And even if they do, they still won't be binding, but only a set of 'recommendations' to be ignored and they won't be charged with uncovering all the financial frauds perpetrated by current and past office holders. All they might spell out is how Marietta could spend money wiser, not how much money the city does or does not have.

Something else the city still doesn't have- absentee ballots. For those blissfully unaware, it was revealed by WMOA that those far-off residents of our once fair town expecting an absentee ballot so they could participate in the gas aggregation plot are still waiting. (Before someone whines anew that yours truly concentrates too much on WMOA, they remain the only member of the casual media to have covered this story.) Yours truly considers the current fiasco-in-waiting at the election office karmic retribution for those who asked "Can't we please have someone else than Becky Kirkbride? She's so awful that even a trained penguin would be better." Apparently a trained penguin couldn't be found.

Note that mention of the gas aggregation issue. It's noteworthy because it's just about the only place you've seen mention of it. What's also noteworthy is that no member of Council who is responsible for this contrivance is talking up support for it now. Silent are Bertram and Vukovic on this issue. Would they were on all others. For those who forget, the issue on the ballot is whether or not all households that use natural gas will be lumped in to service provided by one of the most corrupt energy providers in North America. Said provider was chosen and invited by Council to receive this largess. If the combination of a most corrupt energy provider and this local coven of corruption doesn't make you nervous, dear reader, you probably shouldn't waste your time reading this space any more.

Problem is you won't be able to pick up a copy of the Marcolian to peruse instead. In the same week a cartoon Mohammed was kept off of American television for fear of offending terrorists, an entire run of the Marcolian was aborted to prevent a 'column' (i.e., not a news story) from offending a dinky student senate. Happily, offense will be kept to a maximum here if only to ensure that someone does so somewhere. Also, if anyone on the Marcolian staff would like to send the offending column to yours truly, it will be posted in its entirety.

The Bad Government Blues

2006-04-09T10:16:00.000-04:00

The news of the week doesn't take much commentary. No one has to point out just how awful poo smells, after all. Speaking of poo, let's begin with the latest update from lower education.

It turns out that this year was not the first year Judy Wray inappropriately copied standardized state tests. She had done so last year as well but didn't get caught then. One may continue to wonder what else she didn't get caught doing and for how long. When confronted with her 'indiscretion', Wray was not apologetic. She wasn't contrite. No, instead Wray was defiant, vulgar, quick to blame others for the problem she caused and suggestive of an institutional cover-up as a matter of policy. She's perfect for city government in other words.

Another outstanding specimen of Marietta's governmental gold standard is the latest double-dealing by Council in regards to city employees. Though completely unreported in the casual media, at the conclusion of Tuesday's finance committee meeting, Head Wound Harry Vukovic suggested that the Anthem settlement money, amounting to well over $500,000 would be used to replace the Gutberlet money Council squandered on the Adams-Fordham-Scales $2,000,000 fraud. While this may seem a good idea and even honorable to some Citizens, the cruel truth is that city employees have been assured that the Anthem money would be used to make sure that no (further) cutbacks directly involving employees would take place. Therefore, Vukvoic's causal comment Tuesday is yet another betrayal by Council to those who actually work for the city.

As for the recent Justice Center Circus, there’s not much to say other than it’s clear that a good number of Council members are Hell-bent on forcing millions of dollars of new debt on the city without regard to the stated preference of taxpayers who’ll be paying for that debt decades into the future. Happily, those Citizens still with traces of sanity can take comfort that those pushing the project forward are the likes of Burnworth and McGlynn. The latter seems to have now developed a philosophical dislike for the planning commission. She complained that a member of the planning commission had complained about the plan for the justice center. Imagine that.

Perhaps McGlynn can take a page from comrade Burnworth’s playbook and suggest just doing away with the planning commission altogether. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Let’s forget the implications that repealing the parking laws will do if, say, some giant retailer decides to locate downtown. Since said retailer wouldn’t have to provide any parking at all, why not? They could build near the justice center, thereby locating near the only industry soon to be left in town: mismanaged government.

The Anti-Auditor

2006-04-02T08:26:00.000-04:00

Your humble narrator can add no more to the words of praise and thanks that have already been offered for Chief Baker. What can be offered is the idea that building the Marietta Fire Department into a sterling example a department should and could be is the best legacy and tribute possible. We should all work towards that as our way of saying thanks and our way of measuring up to his example.

From a life well lived, we must now descend back into lives currently being misspent on mismanaging Marietta. What a busy week those people had. Because we’re all in need of some comedy, let’s start off with everyone’s favorite dead bird enthusiast and alleged barrister Randall J. Burnworth. Surprising exactly nobody, Burnworth made these comments that appeared in the Marietta Times: "Councilman Randy Burnworth, D-at large, wanted to get rid of the parking variance ordinance altogether. 'This is clearly and unequivocally my effort to put the justice center project back on track,' Burnworth said." The only startling aspect of this admission was that Burnworth had the chutzpah to be so up front about his view of the law.

Think about it- this lawyer doesn’t like the outcome of a legal proceeding, conducted well within the bounds of propriety, so now the lawyer wants to abolish the particular law. Why? So he and his chums can have a new building no one but he and his chums want, to be paid for by taxpayers who aren’t exactly enthusiastic about the idea, most especially the cost. It’s all like a bad Mexican soap opera, except it’s not. Instead, Burnworth is just the latest nimrod responsible for turning Marietta into a banana republic from a town founded by heroes of world history.

It might seem corny to ask the question, but is Burnworth’s attitude the sort of behavior envisioned by those veterans of the Revolutionary War? Obviously not. In fact, in those terms, which are not unreasonable standards, Burnworth's comments are repulsive. What’s more, they are entirely uncalled for, even for his own scheme. If Council wants the Justice Center project to go ahead, all they have to do is grant the project an exception to the law as it currently stands. But that’s not what Burnworth is proposing. No, he wants to make sure he’s got support for making an end-run around the process by tying his scheme to the concerns of downtown merchants. It’s a naked (if dear readers will pardon that word in any association with Burnworth) attempt to create factions in town. It’s an attempt to divide Citizens, not bring them together. It’s not subtle and it’s something Burnworth should be ashamed of but he is obviously not.

Merchants are being set up as patsies in the whole scam and again, Burnworth at least has the grapes to not pretend otherwise. Here are some excerpts from a Saturday Times story, their third on the subject: "Rodger Mendenhall, a member of the Marietta Planning Commission, is concerned about a proposal by Councilman Randy Burnworth that would call for repeal of a parking variance requirement for new construction in downtown Marietta. … 'Having talked with Mr. Burnworth about this, his motivations have nothing at all to do with downtown parking,' Mendenhall said. 'His motivation is with the justice center alone.'" Not that anyone should have had any doubts after Burnworth’s original comment, but there it is again- all this other noise about downtown merchants and downtown development is an attempt to give the Justice Center project more de facto support than it would have otherwise. The other clear fact is that Burnworth apparently hasn’t given a thought to what any other part of downtown will look like when the city doesn’t have money because it’s paying a new $5,000,000 mortgage. Money for things like repairs to police cruisers, or money on hand so cops don’t have to stop questioning suspects because they can’t work overtime. Oh wait- those things are already happening.

It was revealed anew this week that the City of Marietta is not meeting certain fiscal responsibilities these days. Witness this passage from a WMOA story: "[MPD Officer A. J. Linscott] said that at this point in time, the police department’s needs are not being provided for. 'Let me tell you, out at the city garage for over three months we’ve had a police cruiser that needs repairs to it, $642. We can’t even get a police cruiser repaired.'" Perhaps the MPD forgot that Council was encouraging more foot patrols these days. But maybe Council isn’t to blame for this shameful situation. Maybe, just maybe, this bit of financial muck has to do with the city ‘auditor’.

‘Hang on now, Professor,’ some may say, ‘is there any proof that important work isn’t getting done because of the "auditor"?’ To answer, yours truly points to these extended passages from another WMOA story: "Marietta City Council’s Finance Committee reviewed a proposal from the city’s development department for an amended Community Development Block Grant budget. However, in the absence of the city auditor the budget proposal could go no further. … Auditor Sharon Adams is in the hospital. The proposed budget changes will wait on Adams’ return and approval before they are passed into law. The City of Marietta traditionally receives its annual CDBG entitlement of around $500,000 in March or April of each year. However, the entitlement cannot be paid out until a budget has been approved by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development. Following Adams’s return and approval, council is expected to hold a special meeting to pass the CDBG budget." To summarize while Adams is not discharging her duties, the receipt of some half a million dollars from the federal government will have to wait. If that’s on hold, what’s so big about a few hundred bucks for a police cruiser?

And hang on, but didn't we read someplace that everything is going just fine these days in the auditor’s office? Yep, here from the Times story about the lawsuit against the ‘auditor’: "Marietta Chief Deputy Auditor Sherri Hess said things were running smoothly at the auditor’s office and she expected Adams back within a few days. 'I think it’s day to day, seeing how she feels,' said Hess. 'But we have two deputies and we all have our jobs to do so it’s fine.'" Those comments seem to be a little at odds with what we learned about the CDBG budget. In fact, they are totally at odds with those and other facts that some very key functions aren’t being fulfilled and can’t be until the ‘auditor’ returns. It’s unfortunate that so many people who not only contribute to the city but are also dependent on it are being made to worry that the city faces such dire circumstances that the bills can’t be paid. The truth is that some simply don’t want to pay those bills, so they are claiming hard times to avoid doing so.

For example, there’s no secret that ‘auditor’ Adams has been leading a vendetta against the MFD since the late 1890’s. She helps foster the idea that the department is a ‘strain’ on city finances. More to her liking, she also has a way of delaying pension payments, letting paperwork involving the MFD lay around unattended and unresolved, and playing other malicious tricks. Now the General Fund that she helped corrupt is simultaneously being cited as a reason to deny raises and benefits and manpower to the MFD while the revenue from the new EMS billing props up the Fund scam instead of assisting the department.

Adams’ one lone talent is corrupting finances. She has absolutely and completely corrupted the finances of Marietta and now we know her personal finances are not exactly well managed. Wherever she goes she spreads crookedness and malice. That’s why from now on in this space she will be referred to as the anti-auditor. Marietta would be far better off if she were to never return to office.

Last and least we should perhaps talk about what Head Wound Harry said and did this week. On second thought, let’s not. Head Wound doesn’t care how badly Marietta’s money is managed. He doesn’t care that the anti-auditor is a confirmed law-breaker. He doesn’t care about looking like a jackass in front of state auditors. What he does care about is opposing every idea supported by Mayor Mullen. Head Wound also cares about defending the honor of his beloved Art Fordham. As such, the likelihood of a ‘performance audit’ are zero- just like the chances that Marietta will get back on track with this pack of charlatans at the helm.

Unhappy Unwelcome News

2006-03-29T09:50:00.000-05:00

From this WMOA story:
http://www.mariettaonline.com/news/news_detail.php?ID=5445

"MFD Chief Ted Baker Passes Away at 53
By Callie Lyons, Reporter, WMOA News

Marietta Fire Chief Ted Baker passed away last night.

Baker, who served the Marietta Fire Department for 32 years, was playing basketball with his men when he collapsed. It appears that he succumbed to a heart attack.

Baker had been Marietta’s fire chief for nearly 8 years, tirelessly advocating for better conditions for his men and increased staffing for the department.

The Chief was involved in fighting many of Marietta’s major fires and he even delivered a couple of babies.

He was perhaps most proud of his family - his wife Linda, their kids Luke and Valerie, and several grandchildren whose photos adorned the walls of his office.

Those who know Baker best say they will miss his gentle sense of humor."

The 'Auditor's' Real Money Crisis

2006-03-28T10:04:00.000-05:00

Readers of this space have known for weeks that city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams is facing a civil lawsuit for a bad debt. Today, finally, the Marietta Times decided to cover the story. The story itself provides only a shred of new information, but it certainly is chock full of new lies by Adams herself. Let’s vivisect them.

From today’s story: “InfiBank, a national bank that issues credit cards and loans, filed a suit against Adams in January, claiming she had defaulted on her payments and owed the company $5,692 plus interest. ... Early Monday, Adams said that she had not heard about the case or the company.”

The abominable ‘auditor’ said she had “not heard about the case or the company”, eh?

From a few paragraphs later: “Marietta Municipal Court records show Adams’ signature on a certified letter that was sent to her in January notifying her of the suit. Court records also show that Adams signed a cardholder’s agreement with InfiBank on April 15, 2004.”

Oopsy. Apparently she did know about ‘InfiBank’ and she knew about the lawsuit. That’s two more lies then. Hang on- there’s more. She actually admits the earlier lie then spouts a new one.

“'I was just shocked when I found out,' Adams [lied]. 'Immediately, I contacted (InfiBank) and they said that’s no problem. ... And they set me up payments and that’s what I’ve been doing.'”

Compared to:

“When Adams failed to respond to the complaint in the time allotted, the lawyers for InfiBank filed a motion earlier this month that they be granted a default judgment of $5,692.”

Mark you, no one on Council will discuss this. They won’t consider the possibility that maybe the city’s finances should not be left in the hands of a mentally unbalanced person who cannot manage her own measly rotten finances.

And before readers of this space enjoy some schaddenfreude, most especially male members of the MFD (because we all know how much Adams hates the male members of the MFD [wink, wink- nudge, nudge]), pay attention to the very end of the Times article. Quoth: “Marietta Chief Deputy Auditor Sherri Hess said things were running smoothly at the auditor’s office and she expected Adams back within a few days. 'I think it’s day to day, seeing how she feels,' said Hess.” As yours truly mentioned yesterday, if Adams merely retires or doesn’t run for reelection, it’s doubtful the mess she has created will ever get straightened out. It would be far too easy for the Coven to just let things go.

The ‘illness’ of the ‘auditor’ may just be a pretext for her to leave as gracefully as possible. Her ‘illness’ was certainly a pretext for not speaking to the Times for a while so Adams could cook up her lies. And that same person is still the only person with access to the city’s only non-fuel credit card. More great money management from a city known for great money managers.

One final note for those who savor such ironies: Adams is scheduled to be in front of Judge Welch.

(PS- It seems as though the Times site is now usually updating everything but the front page in the morning. Expect that trend to stop now that it’s been mentioned here.)

‘Crisis’ versus Crisis!

2006-03-27T13:11:00.000-05:00

More than one correspondent has asked your humble narrator if there really is a crisis in Marietta’s finances. The not-so-simple answer is "Yes". The reason why it isn’t so simple is because the real crisis isn’t in the books, it’s with those who manage the books.

As you all know, when Council passed the 2006 budget, it was said to contain a $1.2 million shortfall. Therefore, the newly elected Council and the ancillary thieves and dimwits in other elected offices have been imposing fee increases and overtime cutbacks, and enacting other ‘cost saving’ measures throughout the city. Those among us who remain stubbornly ignorant may believe that Council is acting properly by taking those steps. However, it’s clear upon cursory examination that the $1.2 million ‘crisis’ is over.

Here are the developments that drove a dagger into the heart of the manufactured crisis:

- The city will likely be making $500,000 from the EMS fees this year. (That’s a low-ball estimate, mind you.)

- Though it’s not been made very public yet, the city will be receiving well over $500,000 from something called ‘the Anthem settlement’. This is a long and tawdry story, like all those involving Council, so for now you’ll just have to accept the fact and the figure.

- The Municipal Court will cost the city $130,000 less to operate this year than last.

- The city doesn’t have to give the MPD the raises they were promised this year.

- The city’s revenue from taxes and almost every other major source of income will be higher than outlined in the 2006 budget. (This isn’t a new phenomenon and does NOT include cigarette tax revenue. Those who wrote the budget don’t know what they are doing and the shrill, incoherent ‘auditor’ intentionally low-balls revenue so she’ll have some ‘extra’ money to play with.)

- The General Fund is due around $200,000 from the water-sewer ‘cost allocation’ plan this year that one can be sure was not written into the 2006 budget. (More about this in a bit.)

It sure didn’t take long to get up to $1.2 million there, did it? The trouble is even though that ‘crisis’ has been resolved, other pitfalls are out there. In general one may presume the 2006 budget has undiscovered problems because buffoons wrote it. For instance, we may discover very soon that there are substantial problems with other city accounts, not just the General Fund. Actually, just bet on that happening.

What will make the undiscovered problems worse is the bigger already-discovered problem that still exists: Marietta is being governed by a drooling, no-talent, spineless Z-team. In other words, even if the 2005 $2,000,000 fraud has been ‘fixed’ on the backs of everyone but those responsible, and the 2006 $1,200,000 hole has been plugged (actually the same problem and solution there), those still responsible for the mess are still going to be in charge. Yet another way of saying is that Marietta’s never had a money problem, but Marietta has long long had a money management problem that continues.

At the very center of this web of corruption and idiocy is the city ‘auditor’. Since she’s been in that office before Calvin Coolidge was President, she’s had quite enough time to infect every aspect of money management in this city. Behold the results. For those who wonder why yours truly has it in for the abominable ‘auditor’, this is it. Until she is removed, nothing can improve. Some may think it would be enough for her to slither back under a rock or go into motel management (which is the only job she even claims to be qualified for). However, if Adams were to merely retire or not run for reelection, it’s highly doubtful the problems would get solved. What must happen for Marietta to have any sober chance of getting the money situation under control is for there to be a complete, investigative and comprehensive audit of all city books and accounts. Yours truly is quite confident that if such a thing were undertaken, Adams would have much to be ashamed for and probably one or two things to be jailed for. As it is, Adams is hanging on to public office only for her paycheck; she’s much more interested in serving her creditors than Marietta.

The only thing that is more important to Adams than her shoe collection is destroying people she does not like. A very short list of things Adams doesn’t like include: the existence of the Marietta Fire Department, the phrase "Mayor Mullen", bookkeeping, womanly haircuts on women (explaining the unholy alliance of Adams and Times editor BA Houtman) and Sunshine laws. Those who caught the comment by yours truly this past Saturday may have already read this WMOA story. Here is the key passage: "City Auditor Sharon Adams has stated that she only reimbursed $100,000 in 2003 and 2004 despite the ordinance, because that’s the way it was done in prior years. After the error was revealed in the 2004 state audit, which was released December 31, 2005, WMOA News first requested the amount of water and sewer reimbursements to the general fund on January 10, 2006. This week, Adams and Council Finance Committee Chair Tom Vukovic fulfilled the request with nearly 250 pages worth of financial information in two separate mailings that cost the city $8.41 in postage." Anyone care to guess how many laws Adams broke based on that? How about the total number of lawbreaking infractions? In 2003 and 2004 Adams ADMITS she did not follow city law, thereby depriving the General Fund of roughly $200,000. Further, she and Head Wound Harry Vukovic brazenly violated several sections of the state’s open records laws, including that nonsense about 250 pages worth of documentation to answer such a simple question. On top of the lawless behavior displayed, think about how much municipal work time was wasted on such childish antics. Adams and Head Wound Harry were elected to serve and whether they like it or not, that means serve every sector of the Citizenry, most damned especially the lone legitimate media outlet that seems to understand the problems facing our once fair city. But instead of doing that Adams and Council’s finance committee chair refused to share information. Just like they did about the $2,000,000 fraud in the 2005 budget.

That’s why Head Wound Harry’s career on Council should end now. Sure we can all take pride that he can write lyrical poetry, expressing without shame his tender feelings for another man, but that doesn’t mean he should be on Council. He invokes and ignores time limits on speakers at committee meetings. He’s encouraging city departments to decline the offer of a comprehensive city-wide performance audit or better yet, plan to have one done without involving the Mayor. And most importantly, Vukovic is still lying. He’s admitted to lying or at the very least covering up the 2005 budget fraud. He lied about the General Fund, about how the fund made it through 2005, about "not knowing" Mullen had proposed an increase to the hotel tax for the Armory, about how well the branches of government communicate and on and on and on. Vukovic lies to cover up for the criminal Art Fordham, the criminal Adams, and he lies to blame Mullen or anyone on his staff. He has not demonstrated any intelligence, any insight, any comprehension on any issue. The only two things he doesn’t lie about: how much he detests anything "Mullen" and how much he (manfully) loves Art Fordham. Wait- he did recently admit he knew nothing about the city’s budget process after years on the finance committee. So that’s three things.

Finally, for those who claim Mayor Mullen is to blame for all these problems, is anyone out there willing to publicly state that they believe Mullen has the brain and charm power to pull off such a tremendous scam as the 2005 budget?

More Proof that the Times is Dangerously Incompetent

2006-03-24T07:13:00.000-05:00

"Wednesday, March 15, 2006 — Time: 8:25:20 AM EST
City explores 2006 budget options
By Diana DeCola, ddecola@mariettatimes.com
Marietta officials learned Tuesday that the outlook for the city’s general fund is not as bad as they thought three months ago. The current balance of the general fund is $335,436. The city started the year with a $1.2 million shortfall."

And

"Friday, March 24, 2006 — Time: 7:04:43 AM EST
Marietta general fund balance shows drastic slump
By Diana DeCola, Special to The News

As of Thursday, Marietta City Council reported the city’s general fund balance to be $26,300.63, after all bills have been paid.The drastic slump in the general fund is why city council has decided to consider forecasting the city’s budget."

The Latest and Not So Greatest

2006-03-23T09:52:00.000-05:00

(Interested readers are directed to the comments section for a substantial [i.e., wordy] post from your humble narrator updated Saturday morning. -Ed.)

It’s difficult to know where to start today’s screed, given all that’s plaguing our once fair town. As such, let’s just pick up where we left off: the saga of Judy Wray. Even though much time has elapsed since this story broke, the whole thing seems to get only cloudier the more that is revealed. The long-term consequences for Wray are still unknown. However, it seems pretty clear that the state should deny her a teaching certificate and a job. Here why, from a WMOA story on the topic: "Unlike prior years, [Marietta City Schools Superintendent Doug Baker] said the state is scheduled to release only 40 percent of the 2006 test in July. Some of the test will be retained and used again next year." That means Wray would have been able to instruct next year’s students on some of the exact questions that would be in next year’s test. That means she’s a cheater. That means she should be on permanent unpaid leave beginning now.

Unfortunately though, should things turn out that way for Wray, it’s unlikely she’ll remain on Council. To do otherwise would mean she’d have to find a job she’s qualified for while riding out the vast tide of opinion that’s against her staying. Neither of those will be easy. As has been outlined already, if Wray resigns, the city’s Democratic central committee will be responsible for naming –yes, naming- her replacement. For reasons also already outlined, Art Fordham is the most likely candidate for Wray’s replacement. Though he has two million good reasons to stay the Hell away from Council, he’s also got the same two million reasons to get back on it. If the asinine one is truly so stupid as to believe he can ‘fix’ the mess he helped cause, and do so without having had to run for reelection and therefore be unanswerable to anyone, Fordham will take the chance. Before then though, the state has to decide the future of Wray’s teaching ‘career’.

Meanwhile, the vast and nefarious campaign of misinformation continues. It has come to the attention of your humble narrator that false information is being fed to concerned Citizens. Anyone out there who has recently been told that Marietta is the only community along the Ohio River to retain a full-time paid fire department is strongly encouraged to visit the following websites:

http://www.ci.steubenville.oh.us/fire/
http://www.ci.portsmouth.oh.us/departments/fire/index.html
http://www.firedepartments.net/Ohio/StClairsville/CumberlandTrailFireDistrict.html
http://www.firedepartments.net/Ohio/Ironton/CityOfIrontonFireDepartment.html

Yes, even desolate Steubenville has a full-time professional FD. As does the Queen City, which apparently the state official who spread this misinformation forgot about or just omitted because of convenience. We wouldn’t want Marietta to think it deserves ‘big city’ services after all.

Furthermore, based on the latest information, it seems as though the MFD is going to be generating nearly $500,000 in brand spanking new revenue this year. This is real money, not a fake revenue source like the one in the 2005 budget. No, this money is going to come from the EMS billing. Just imagine if Council had acted on the EMS billing idea four or five years ago when it was first proposed to them. Actually, if Council had acted on it then, that would merely mean that Council would have been ripping off the MFD for years.

The city’s own budget only calls for an anticipated $200,000 from the EMS billing. Therefore, it would be only right for Council to promise and act now to redirect any money collected over $200,000 back to the MFD. Council could even decide to skim another $100,000 off the EMS program and then promise to give the rest back to those who are earning it. Instead though, the Coven intends to keep taking the money made by the MFD to cover up and fix the 2005 budget fraud. Moreover, the Coven is taking the money earned by the MFD, denying them even decent living quarters, while pressing on with the rotten Justice Center project. And now a certain state bureaucrat is feeding the discontent, lying that a key public safety institution, making piles of new money for the city, is outdated and outmoded and actually a drain on the city.

One more time: the current budget crisis wasn’t caused by the MFD, the MPD, overtime, the floods, private sector job losses, utility bills, or George W. Bush and Bob Taft. Marietta’s current budget crisis was caused by a two million-dollar budget fraud compounded by the municipal court milking the city’s finances and the choice to build a six million-dollar cement pond. The fraud and the other real drains on finances are to be directly blamed on a small group of no-talent simpletons that currently hold every elected office in town as well as their immediate predecessors. The sad and harsh fact is that the most qualified individuals are not running Marietta while the cretins, thieves and cheaters that are running Marietta are also ruining Marietta.

"Constituents with concerns about the local situation can contact [state auditor Betty] Montgomery's Southeast Ohio Regional Liaison Holly Potter at 1-800-441-1389."

¡FIVE ALARM CITIZEN ALERT!

2006-03-17T16:44:00.000-05:00

(Be sure to check the comments to read ongoing updates from your humble narrator on this topic. –Ed.)

Here is late breaking news of the day, from this WMOA story:

http://www.mariettaonline.com/news/news_detail.php?ID=5396

"Breach of Test Protocol Discovered

Following a closed school board meeting this morning, Marietta City Schools Superintendent Doug Baker said the local investigation into the reproduction of a standardized test was nearly complete – with just a few loose ends to tie up.
...
He released the name of the teacher involved. It’s Judy Wray, who also serves on Marietta City Council as the representative for the city’s third ward. "

The implications of this development are potentially staggering. Beware the Return of Fordham. More on all these developments this weekend.

An Open Letter to Jennifer Houtman and the Marietta Times

2006-03-16T08:14:00.000-05:00

(What follows is the complete text of a letter sent this morning to certain members of the Marietta Times staff, most especially "managing editor" Jennifer 'BA' Houtman. It was sent to these email addresses: jhoutman@mariettatimes.com, jmcintosh@mariettatimes.com, ddecola@mariettatimes.com, jspanner@mariettatimes.com. Your humble narrator will return with a look at the Justice Center, the contract with the MPD and any other developments on the morrow. -Ed.)

Dearest BA,

Though I, as well as most residents of the area, have become used to low standards from your publication, yesterday’s story entitled "City explores 2006 budget options" was the most inaccurate, poorly edited and misleading excuse for a news story yet written on the topic of Marietta’s finances. Nearly every paragraph has a substantial error in it, either factual or grammatical.

The opening is a prime example of the shoddy quality of the whole story: "Marietta officials learned Tuesday that the outlook for the city’s general fund is not as bad as they thought three months ago." The supporting evidence for this outlandish claim amounted to exactly one sentence: "‘Our mission (Tuesday) was to look at where we are with the general fund,’ Mayor Michael Mullen said. ‘It is a better picture than was anticipated three months ago.’" So because Mayor Mullen says the General Fund has a "better picture" as of Tuesday, your idiot reporter believes things are peachy?

Actually, strike that question, because it’s clear the idiot reporter has no clue what she was writing about. Here’s the proof: "The city started the year with a $1.2 million shortfall. Most of the shortfall was made up with half of the $1 million Emma G. Gutberlet bequest left to the city." So the city made up "most" of the "$1.2 million shortfall" with "half of the $1 million" that was left to the city? Though I’ve said it before, Ogden Publications would do well to invest about twenty dollars ($20) on cheap calculators to have on hand for "reporters" to use in times like these.

Back to the inaccuracies in yesterday’s story. Here is another example: "The Ohio Auditor’s Office, in its annual audit of city finances, which was released recently, recommended that city officials regularly review city expenses." In truth, the audit report, which was released not recently but months ago, suggested that the city meet monthly to review those numbers. As you may or may not know, Council in the form of Mr. Vukovic has deigned to meet quarterly on this topic.

Right after that mistake, the story contained this interesting line: "Vukovic attempted to look at the general fund budget’s expenses in depth Tuesday, but didn’t have the expense report from the city auditor that he wanted." Which begs the question, Why didn’t the idiot reporter from your "newspaper" ask the auditor about her lack of preparation for the meeting? Also, why hasn’t your excuse for a paper bothered to talk to Ms Adams about recent revelations about city finances? You have shown yourself quite eager and willing to reprint the most laughable and transparent lies and rumors from Adams, but when there is concrete evidence of wrongdoing on her part, your "newspaper" is quite silent on the matter. Do you have an explanation for such omissions other than laziness?

Next in yesterday’s story is an example of just how lazy your reporters are. Here is the relevant passage: "A proposal was put on the table to raise the hotel/motel tax by 1 percent, up to 6 percent total. ‘If we implement the additional tax, we’re looking at about $65,000 extra to the fund,’ said Mike Scales, assistant safety service director." Now compare what your idiot reporter wrote to this: "‘We can have another one percent on the motel hotel tax,’ Scales said. ‘And, this one percent will be to the city - it will not be shared, it will go to the general fund where it says it's supposed to go. Last year the total amount we took from this fund, according to the record, was approximately $390,000 and if we implement this one percent we're looking at anywhere from $65,000 to $72,000 extra a year to the general fund.’" Big difference, huh? The real difference is that the second quote came from WMOA radio, which had Scales on tape saying those words. The Times story on the other hand relied on your idiot reporter’s version of reality, and what a tenuous version it is.

Next we come to this truly misleading passage of the story, complete with punctuation error: "Other ways to raise revenue include a potential business plan for the Ohio National Guard Armory, on Front Street, which would make it a convention center ,increasing [sic] city tax revenue." Actually, BA, a business plan generates no money. In fact, Council discussed raising the bed tax by two percent (2%), with half going to the General Fund and the other half used for the Armory. Did the idiot reporter simply miss that point or has she learned from you to not care about accuracy? Given this sentence- "A proposal was put on the table to raise the hotel/motel tax by 1 percent, up to 6 percent total."- it’s pretty clear that she wasn’t paying attention or simply didn’t understand all the big words people were using, like "the", "one", or "cat".

Happily, we’re getting near the end of this abominable story. Here is another inaccurate quote: "Another proposal is to reallocate money from other funds into the general fund. One that has been looked at already is the water and sewer fund, another recommendation from the state auditor’s office annual audit. The state auditor’s [sic] found that the city was not allocating money into the general fund at the level required by city code since 2004." In fact, the state auditor’s office suggested that the city merely follow one of its own laws (90(02-03), so you and your crack staff can look it up) by transferring money as described. Further, the city has not ever transferred the full amount as required by law.

Jenny-poo, your paper has already wasted vast amounts of ink defending Art Fordham, Sharon Adams and Tom Vukovic. Every time you send one of the feckless wonders you call "reporters" to cover serious maters, you have a way of making the issues cloudier. Doubtless you will have some excuse handy, or more likely attack the motivations of yours ever so truly. But the fact remains that your paper’s readership is wasting away. Residents of the Valley are more and more clearly recognizing that not only do you produce a shoddy product, but also that your standards are pathetically low, your motivations childishly base, and finally that because of all these, your paper is actually a danger.

In all seriousness, BA, for your own good and for the good of those you’re supposedly serving, just quit now. As it is, every day you and your flunkies continue to pretend you’re working at a newspaper is another day that the truth of what’s happening in our once fair town (that you’ve never lived in and rarely visit off-hours) will not be exposed.

Sincerely,
PC

How to Cover Up a $2,000,000 Fraud

2006-03-12T08:25:00.000-05:00

Now that all of the ‘legitimate media’ have had their say about the developments of the week, yours truly will now examine the remains. And what a bloody mess they are.

The most unsurprising yet most damning new fact to emerge is that every party responsible for the $2,000,000 fraud contained in the 2005 city budget knew that the fraud was there last year and didn’t tell anyone or take any steps to fix the problem. That’s one of those sentences that should be read over and over until the awful truth of it sinks in. Someone in government deliberately slipped $2,000,000 of fiction into the budget for the city’s most important account, the General Fund, and everyone responsible knew the fraud was there and did nothing about it and told no one else, most especially the Citizens they’re elected to serve, whose money they were playing with. It’s utterly inexcusable, wholly negligent, possibly criminal and completely impeachable. Every person the Citizens of Marietta elected to office to wisely or at least competently manage public affairs deceived those very Citizens and by doing so, have literally bankrupted one of the city’s primary accounts and thoroughly corrupted the rest of the city’s books. And they did it on purpose.

While the tar is warming and chickens are being plucked, let’s take a breath and accumulate the evidence. The admission that both the Mayor and city Council knew about the fraud not just last week but last year is found in this WMOA story. Here are the relevant passages about Thursday’s finance committee meeting: "Marietta city officials admit they have known since last year that the city’s 2005 budget was plugged with $1.9 million of fictional money. ... There were no quick or easy answers for why the public was not made aware of the city’s $2 million error. 'If you and members of the administration were aware of the $1.9 million in 2005 why is the public just now learning of this?' asked WMOA News Director Callie Lyons. 'Why has this never been discussed in a public session? And, shouldn't this information have come from the administration or council instead of an outside committee?' The questions were directed at council, but after members declined to respond, Mayor Michael Mullen explained. 'We were focusing on trying to - we identified it was an issue that caused us to have a false sense of security in our finances.'" What the online version of the story fails to capture that was so uncomfortable on tape was the awful awkward pause after she had asked the question. It was the radio version of Art Fordham’s awful awkward pause at being asked about firefighters. Only this is even more damning and embarrassing. Or at least it should be.

If the members of Council had any sense of responsibility or shame, someone would have at least said it was a mistake to have not mentioned the $2,000,000 "error" to the public. Or if not the public, maybe they should have mentioned it to those city employees who are currently being asked to take pay and benefit cuts. "By the way, the reason we’re forcing you to cut back in overtime," Vukovic could have said to members of the police department, "is that Art Fordham, Sharon Adams, Mike Scales and I colluded to put a fake source of revenue in the budget last year. It was just shy of $2,000,000 and it was in the General Fund, which is where salaries come from and we never bothered to fix the problem, or even correct the budget on paper. So anyway, we have to balance the books now, so thanks for helping fix our fraud." Nope, instead of that, or any member of government being straight with what happened to the General Fund, Council let the problem go, feigned surprise and then lied as to why the General Fund collapsed. The next person who says the General Fund collapsed because of "the floods" should be slapped in the mouth for lying. The General Fund collapsed because a fifth of its 2005 budget was an intentional fraud and everyone responsible knew it and just let the problem go and thereby grow.

Evidence that the city’s mentally unhinged ‘auditor’ knew about the fraud is in this Times story from earlier in the week. Here are the key sentences: "Yet the city auditor, who typically certifies the figures Mullen uses for preparing the budget for council, knew that the $1.9 million was earmarked elsewhere. It wasn’t until later that year that the city’s treasurer publicly told Mullen that the funds could not be used to balance the budget." So- the ‘auditor’ and the treasurer knew about the fraud in 2005. That the treasurer knew isn’t news, but that line about the ‘auditor’ is potentially quite damning. Since there’s no source for that information, it’s not clear who told the three (yes, three) reporters who wrote the story. But until they retract the claim or the ‘auditor’ appears in another story claiming otherwise, it will stand. Anyway, readers can be sure that ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams knew that fake $2,000,000 was there. It had never appeared anywhere in any other budget ever before and despite what the Times story reported that money wasn’t "earmarked" for other things- it simply didn’t exist. It would be like the budget including a $2,000,000 source of revenue from the fees the city collects for unicorn hunting licenses. It just wasn’t there, never had been and never would be. And yet someone had to write the line of the budget that had the unicorn hunting fees in it. That person was Scales, Adams or Fordham and whichever one it was, the other two either let it slide or helped it slide. There is no other possibility. There is also no denying that those three people said not a single word about the unicorn hunting fees when the General Fund collapsed in March of last year. Those three didn’t say anything; the treasurer didn’t say anything. No other member of the Coven of Cowards said anything.

So what did they do? Instead of fixing or even merely admitting to the problem they had caused, the Coven and the ‘auditor’ initiated spending freezes and then started writing salary and benefit cuts into the 2006 budget to fix the 2005 fraud. The lying ‘auditor’ said that the collapse of the General Fund had taken her "by complete surprise" at the time. She somehow forgot that the 2005 General Fund budget had $2,000,000 a hole in it that she helped dig. The trick here is knowing whether Adams really did forget about the fraud she helped foster or if she was just outright lying. Given her mental instability, there is a chance that she forgot, or has blocked it out of her delicate psyche. Either way, Sharon Adams lied about her knowledge of and responsibility for what happened to the General Fund last year, just as surely as members of Council did and continue to do.

Proof that Council has absolutely no intention of fixing the real problem with Marietta’s finances, that they are managed by a pack of incompetent, deceptive, agenda-driven scoundrels, is this quote from the WMOA story: "Vukovic said the [$2,000,000 fraud] wasn’t the work of just one person, but the failure of the city’s financial system. Instead of investigating or taking other action through the finance committee, Vukovic said it is his determination to wait for the results of the state audit for 2005." What justification could Head Wound Harry possibly have for not addressing a $2,000,000 fraud immediately? From the same story: "'All I can tell you is that it's amazing that that happened. But, the other part of it is, we made it through the year successfully. We ended the year with $131,000 in the general fund,' Vukovic said." Now, Vukovic has said some pretty dishonest and disgraceful things in the past, but that comment is king. The only reason the city’s General Fund finished 2005 with any money at all was because a very generous and trustful woman left over a million dollars to the city to fix the Armory. It wasn’t because of Art Fordham’s "mastery" of city finances, and it wasn’t because the city ‘auditor’ was burning the midnight oil to find ways to improve those finances. The only way the General Fund had any money at all was because the city got morbidly lucky. For Vukovic to try to paint a rosy picture based on that is disgusting.

Head Wound Harry’s cheerful summation of 2005 is all the more piggish in light of the fact that the city has already frittered away half of Emma Gutberlet’s gift to the city. The money was left in the General Fund and is now gone, as Vukovic himself has repeatedly stated. So then- despite all their promises to spend the money in the spirit it was given, Council has let half of the gift be poured into the abysmal General Fund, never to be seen again. To add insult to injury, the Coven seems willing to explore the possibility of using the remainder of the Gutberlet gift to tear down the building Mrs. Gutberlet wanted to save. When confronted with these awful truths, Vukovic whined that the state auditor would not allow Council to set aside half of the gift as he claimed members of Council and the city ‘auditor’ wanted to. However, the real reason the state auditor didn’t approve the sham plan for the Gutberlet gift is because Council and the city ‘auditor’ have been using that money to prop up the General Fund for months. That’s the reason the state auditor nixed Council’s scheme for the Gutberlet money, just like the $2,000,000 fraud is the reason the state auditors will begin the 2005 audit in just a few weeks. "Someone" included the $2,000,000 fraud in the 2005 budget so that it appeared to balance when it was passed into law at the beginning of the year and the Gutberlet gift let them pretend that the books really did balance after all. In other words, Council used the gift to cover up the fraud and they continue to do so.

Given all these circumstances, no one can be surprised that Vukovic would say nonsense like this from the WMOA story: "Blame is not what the issue is. We are trying to move forward with this and improve the financial health of the city. That's really what we are working towards." Of course the people most to blame for a $2,000,000 fraud don’t want to talk about it. Not having people talk about it, that’s really what they’re working towards. That’s why Head Wound Harry instituted innovative rules for speaking at Coven finance committee meetings. Another WMOA story: "Also, at last evening’s finance committee meeting, Councilman Tom Vukovic asked those in attendance to limit their comments to two minutes. Earlier this year, Council President Paul Bertram brought back a 5-minute rule employed by council in previous years. In doing so, he asked that those who attend regular sessions of council keep their remarks within a 5-minute time frame and reserve extended discussion for committee meetings. However, those who followed his advice last night to attend the finance committee meeting, were informed that they would be permitted to speak only once for no longer than two minutes." As commentators and e-correspondents have pointed out, the two-minute, one-time only rule did not apply to Junior Nolan. The reason for this distinction is not out of respect to Nolan, but because Nolan is a mouthpiece for Joe Matthews, Art Fordham and/or Vukovic himself, whomever Nolan spoke to last before the meeting. One of those three pillars of the community fills up Nolan’s head with ‘talking points’ about how stupid the current Mayor is, how soft firefighters have it today, how badly the city needs the Justice Center, or whatever, and Nolan spouts it right back during public meetings, saving Vukovic and others the trouble of speaking for themselves. That’s why Nolan spoke more than once Thursday and that’s why he was allowed to babble about the justice center. That’s also why when the Mayor tried to respond, "Head Wound cut him off, saying the committee meeting wasn’t the place to talk about it", as one email put it.

It boils down to this: those directly responsible for a $2,000,000 fraud have no intention of fixing or even addressing the problem. They lied about the Gutberlet money. They lied about the EMS fees. They attacked those who brought the $2,000,000 fraud to light. They restrict public discourse about their mismanagement. Actually, they restrict all public discourse. They whine about their lack of responsibility for finances while they force cutbacks throughout the city. They are not a government to be proud of, nor should they be allowed to stay in office. For the good of the city, Vukovic, Adams and Scales should resign immediately. The rest are put on notice.

Facts, Not Allegations

2006-03-09T08:16:00.000-05:00

A commentator expressed surprise that there aren’t more people "pissed off" about what was revealed last week. For those still on the fence, here’s a recap of what we now know about Marietta’s finances:

1. The 2005 budget contained a fake source of revenue that totaled $2,000,000, or roughly 20 percent of the entire yearly General Fund budget.

2. Within weeks of passing that fraudulent budget into law, the General Fund was overdrawn.

3. Even after the fund had overdrawn, city Council held no meetings to review the 2005 budget.

4. Council held exactly ZERO meetings in 2005 or 2004 in order to review how much money the city was actually spending.

5. The fraud contained in the 2005 budget has not yet been corrected.

6. Three people are most responsible for the 2005 budget fraud. They are former Councilman Art Fordham, city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams and assistant safety-service director Mike Scales.

7. The city’s current financial crisis came about because the 2005 budget fraud was never corrected.

8. The same three people most responsible for the 2005 budget fraud wrote the 2006 city budget.

9. None of these are "allegations". They are facts.

Councilman Head Wound Harry Vukovic admitted that the $2,000,000 fraud was written into the 2005 budget. Despite what Vukovic and his mentor and muse Fordham have said, city Council holds primary responsibility for the city finances. The more Vukovic lies about that fact, the more suspect he becomes. Is he shirking his responsibility because he’s a criminal or is he just an idiot? At this point, it’s difficult to tell. Yours truly has money on "he’s criminally idiotic".

For those still touting a "performance audit" by the state as a way to fix all these problems- you’re absolutely wrong. Performance audits are designed to improve functionality of bookkeeping methods, savings measures and so on. Another way to think of it is performance audits do not solve problems like a city auditor who feels no need to comply with state or federal law or with basic accounting standards. Performance audits do not solve the problem of inactive, inattentive, incompetent and/or criminal mischief perpetrated by members of city Council. As they currently exist now, the city’s books are a nightmarish swamp that need to be drained. Draining out all the muck and slime and resetting the books so they reflect the reality of city finances, which they certainly do not now, is the work of a "special audit". Once all the mess created by Adams and Fordham has been cleaned up, then and only then would a "performance audit" make sense.

Unfortunately for those who still care about our once fair town, state auditors must suspect embezzlement or similar felonious activity before they will undertake a "special" audit on their own. City Council may request a special audit, but given the fact that the cowards now on Council seem more interested in trashing Mayor Mullen for uncovering the 2005 budget scam than they are in fixing it, yours truly doubts that a request from Council will be forthcoming.

Therefore it’s up to Citizens to make their government act as it should. Here are some very important facts for those who care:

"Constituents with concerns about the local situation can contact [state auditor Betty] Montgomery's Southeast Ohio Regional Liaison Holly Potter at 1-800-441-1389."

"The state auditor’s office is responsible for oversight of the city’s financial records, but the office has little enforcement authority. Constituents with concerns about wrongdoing pertaining to the city’s finances are encouraged to contact Ohio’s Attorney General’s office. ... An online form is available at Petro’s website for filing constituent complaints. The address is http://www.ag.state.oh.us/contact/inquiry_form.asp."
(Those quotes taken from two different WMOA stories on this topic. -Ed.)

An Ohio Bar association website about municipal recall elections: http://www.ohiobar.org/pub/lycu/index.asp?articleid=331

Last and certainly not least, your humble narrator reminds everyone that today there is a finance committee meeting at five o’clock. The 2005 budget scam is scheduled to be discussed. If you care and have the ability to go, you should. After all, Head Wound Harry says over and over that everyone should go to committee meetings. Maybe Vukovic will treat those in attendance to some of his poetry. Here’s a little ditty written by Head Wound Harry to the financial genius and con artist Art Fordham:

To Art-
"After 19 years, it can't be time to go
The city still needs you, all of us know
How you kept us all focused and kept us on task
Who we will get to help us, who will we ask?"

Head Wound is such a jackass it's almost funny.

Tommy's Tantrum

2006-03-05T10:08:00.000-05:00

It’s clear from the public and private commentators as well as your humble narrator’s ‘Inbox’ that many of you were and remain outraged at the tantrum Councilman Vukovic threw during Thursday night’s Council meeting. Most of you rightly point out that Vukovic, like everyone else that spoke Thursday evening, chose to not address the key issue: the $2,000,000 fraud passed into law in the 2005 city budget (a.k.a. the smoking gun). No one explained it, though Vukovic did verify that it happened. Ignoring Council’s five-minute rule, and the idea behind it that Council meetings are for "formal business" only, Vukovic admitted then ignored the key finding of the report released by the Mayor’s "Financial Advisory Committee": the $2,000,000 fraud written into the 2005 city budget. It was never corrected and thus led directly into the financial crisis facing the city today.

One key contention of Head Wound Harry Vukovic’s interminable rant Thursday night was that his mentor and longtime companion Art Fordham was warning about the dangers facing the General Fund last year, when Fordham was the chair of the finance committee and Vukovic was his punk on that same committee. Since Head Wound Harry made such a fuss about how diligent Art Fordham was back in "late March" of 2005, yours truly referred back to the archives of this space from that time. It was so late in March that yours truly wrote about it on April 1, 2005 in a post prophetically if not poetically entitled "The Gathering Financial Poop Storm". It was at the very end of March 2005 that the city’s General Fund was overdrawn for the first time that year. (To those new readers of this space arriving daily: beware. You might find the "tone" of this space a year ago a bit jarring. Yours truly has been informed that tone causes palpitations and consternation, unlike the refined, velvety tone of recent weeks- "fat-headed crybaby" and "jackass" aside. -Ed.) The very next day, your humble narrator posted a philippic titled "Recall AAS Adams Now".

In those postings, there is ample evidence that Art Fordham was certainly not running around crying loudly about the state of the city’s finances and plenty of evidence he was doing nothing about it. On April 1, here’s what Fordham was saying in the Times about the "crisis" in the General Fund, which had just been overdrawn: "In May, or as early as April, Fordham said the city may get about $200,000 in property taxes, which would help build up the general fund." Fordham wasn’t exactly setting off warning alarms there. More to the point, what Fordham did not say, before or since, is that the General Fund was overdrawn at that time- and continues to suffer- because he and the city auditor included a fake $2,000,000 source of revenue in the 2005 budget. If the General Fund hadn’t been overextended it’s not certain Fordham would have said anything at all about the city’s finances (you know, like his classic reaction to the question about firefighters). Therefore Vukovic’s claim that he and Fordham, Marietta’s financially ambiguous duo, were doing all they could is utterly false.

The General Fund was crashing into the ground by March of 2005 because of the fraudulent budget Council had passed into law the previous December. We now know what city Council was NOT doing to address the problem: the finance committee was not reviewing actual expenditures versus the budgeted expenditures (In other words, they weren’t monitoring how the city’s money was actually being spent, nor how much money the city was actually receiving, all this is documented in the 2004 state audit report.); they were not appropriating money from other city accounts owed to the General Fund, even though that money totaled at least $200,000 (this was the subject of two separate citations by the state auditor’s office); the finance committee did not go back and review the 2005 budget to look for possible errors that would have caused the General Fund to crash, one example being a $2,000,000 fraudulent source of revenue. Instead what Council did was blame the problem on ‘the floods’, ‘fixed costs’ and ‘rising utility bills’. In fact, here’s a quote from an anonymous story that appeared in the Times on April 1, 2005: "In March the city spent $1.2 million out of the general fund on things like rising utility bills, workmen's compensation and a double payment on health insurance." As is typical in Times’ stories that involve city finances, those facts were not attributed to anyone, which really doesn’t matter now since we know it’s all lies.

The General Fund crashed in early spring 2005 because at the end of 2004, city Council passed into law a budget that fraudulently relied on $2,000,000in revenue that never did and never would exist. The General Fund did not crash because of utility bills, which total less than $100,000 per year for the entire city. It crashed because Art Fordham and the city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams made sure that it would.

No one, not even Head Wound Harry, can pretend the $2,000,000 fraud didn’t happen. It was in the 2005 budget and remained uncorrected. This is the key as to why the 2006 budget has a shortfall. All the department cuts, all the cuts in insurance plans, cutbacks in overtime for the police department, the theft of the EMS fees from the fire department, all of it is because of the $2,000,000 fraud. Remember- that’s roughly 20 percent of the entire General Fund yearly budget. When an "error" of that size is allowed to infest the books for a year, eventually something has to be done to get the book to balance again. Instead of "divesting" a fraction of the city’s "investments" (i.e., cashing in some CD’s), and instead of reimbursing the General Fund money it's legally owed, and instead of holding the city ‘auditor’ accountable for her duties, city Council is forcing every department in the city to cut back on costs and raise fees paid by the Citizenry.

It’s clear from his tirade Thursday night that Vukovic doesn’t believe city Council has any responsibility for any of this. This is an utter lie that he and his financially ambiguous companion Fordham have repeated over and over. Let’s ignore the fact that it’s Vukovic’s committee that’s forcing cutbacks and fee increases. Some people might consider that taking an active and therefore responsible role in money matters. Obviously Mrs. Vukovic and her husband don’t see it that way. Here’s a quote from Councilperson Vukovic on the topic: "The mayor's balanced budget - I'll reiterate that - it was the mayor's balanced budget. … The mayor is responsible for providing the council with a balanced budget based on certified revenue from the auditor - not the council." That was taken from the WMOA site. Here’s another relevant quote from another story on the same site: "Generally speaking, unless there's an allegation of criminality, the issue of finances lies squarely - if it’s not with the city council, which it obviously is primarily with - but oversight is with the auditor of state." Those are the words of the state auditor herself, speaking in Marietta on Thursday afternoon. One more time, according to the chief financial officer of the state, the responsibility for finances is "obviously" and "primarily" with city Council. Unfortunately, that fact is not at all obvious to the chair of Council’s finance committee.

That quote from the state auditor brings us to the vivisection portion of this space. As mentioned above, the state auditor was in town on Thursday and was obviously willing to answer questions about Marietta’s finances. Wait- sorry- again, it wasn’t all that obvious evidently, because no one from the Times bothered to ask her about the topic. Instead, the Times ran a story about her speaking at a rubber chicken dinner that focused almost entirely on why the auditor chose not to run for governor. She made that decision about two months ago and gave rather exhaustive interviews about it at the time. In other words, the Times had a chance to ask the state’s chief financial officer about the crisis facing Marietta’s finances but chose to rehash a story that was old news weeks ago. Now that’s some fine reporting and editorializing. Here’s another very important fact WMOA got from the auditor that the Times completely missed: "Constituents with concerns about the local situation can contact [state auditor Betty] Montgomery's Southeast Ohio Regional Liaison Holly Potter at 1-800-441-1389."

The Times did manage to send some type of reporter to Council’s Thursday meeting, though why they made the effort is unclear. Still, the story does have a few chuckles. Ignoring all the stylistic and grammatical problems just as the Times ignored all the criticism leveled at it during the meeting, let’s compare these two passages that shed more light on the insipid lies told by Councilpersons: "Council member Kathy Shively questioned what information the [group of accountants] used to fashion its conclusions. If the committee had the kind of financial figures it needed to form an accurate assessment--she questioned why hadn't Mayor Michael Mullen provided that same set of figures to councils [sic] finance committee chairman, Tom Vukovic." and "Vukovic also took issue with suggestions that council and administrators need to communicate more. Vukovic said members of council and administrators are constantly working together." So which is it, kids? Are Council and the administration "constantly working together" or does the Mayor have figures he’s not sharing with Vukovic? For those of you who still care about what reporters used to call "facts", the accountants relied on information available to all members of the public and even members of city Council.

One final note about the Times that yours truly must mention: in this weekend’s print edition (available for free at many merchants and restaurants about town), there was an editorial by the Mayor. It had a few perfunctory words about the importance of the accountants’ findings and so on and then listed out verbatim all of the observations and recommendations. The online edition of the paper does not include the Mayor’s column at all. Why is that? Also, yours truly noticed that the Times chose on Saturday to post a letter online that had appeared in the print edition on Thursday. Why did they do so? Presumably because the letter in question was against the senior housing project that was under consideration by Council Thursday evening and was discussed at the meeting. Two days later, the Times decided to post it online without bothering to post it under the correct day it was originally printed. Point is, there are at least a few persons at the Times who are willing to manipulate the paper’s online contents.

Unfortunately for the Times and its equally shabby sister publication in Parkersburg, or rather unfortunately for those in the Valley who rely on those ‘newspapers’, it’s becoming more plain every day that they aren’t out to do the best reporting they can, they’re out to do whatever reporting they can get away with.

Now a repetitive note: "Constituents with concerns about the local situation can contact [state auditor Betty] Montgomery's Southeast Ohio Regional Liaison Holly Potter at 1-800-441-1389."

Finally, here is some intersting reading material: http://www.ohiobar.org/pub/lycu/index.asp?articleid=331

Last Night's Council Meeting

2006-03-03T08:15:00.000-05:00

Yours truly watched with fascination but no surprise as some practiced demagoguery and dishonestly at last night’s Council meeting. As you all know, earlier this week a group of completely professional and highly trained accountants released a report that revealed how Council approved a fraudulent 2005 city budget that contained a two million-dollar fake revenue source (a.k.a. the smoking gun).

Instead of taking time to explain to Citizens of our once fair town how and why such an egregious error was even possible, some chose to attack the messengers. Two demagogues (Shively and Burnworth) chose to publicly state their thinking was close to that of Junior Nolan, noted political analyst and raconteur. However, among attacks on the accountants and the Mayor and hymns to the brain power of Nolan, Shively and Burnworth did not address the fundamental issue uncovered by the accountants: the two million-dollar fraud. Those two have clearly decided to run for Mayor and chose to attack the incumbent when he wasn’t in the room or even the state. Shively also denounced the connections between public and private dealings with one of the accountants as she sat four feet from Bertram, ignoring or not realizing the irony.

When it came time for Vukovic to speak, he also swung at the messengers, including the local ‘newspaper’. While he was doing that though, Vukovic clearly admitted to the two million-dollar fraud before he started lying about it. After admitting the fraud did happen, Vukovic then responded to comments in the Times story about the accountants’ report, as if anyone believes what they read in the Times these days.

Head Wound Harry seemed most put out by the suggestion that those responsible for the 2005 budget should be "ashamed". Here’s Vukovic’s response: "Mr. Kirkbride’s comment shows a lack of understanding of the budgetary process in city government and the lack of good information and facts about the cause of the problem in the general fund. … Had council failed to pass a budget on January 2nd, 2006, the city government would have ceased operation." Mr. Vukovic’s comment shows a lack of understanding since Kirkbride was talking about the 2005 budget. Plus, Vukovic, you jackass, there's a "lack of good infomration and facts" about the budget process, one you have publicly admitted you do not understand, because you and others have not been doing your jobs. Also because you and others have lied and continue to lie about the facts. One key fact is the two million-dollar fraud you voted into law that was only revealed thanks to outside information provided by the very people you were whining about, you fat-headed crybaby.

Not content with straw man tactics, Vukovic also babbled on about how diligent Council had been with the city’s money. He kept talking on and on about how hard Art Fordham had worked last year and had even warned in March of 2005 how precarious the General Fund was at the time. The problem for Fordham and Vukovic and everyone else involved is that the General Fund was in that condition because of the fake two million-dollar revenue number in the 2005 budget. Based on his comments last night, it’s not entirely clear Vukovic understands that. It’s also unclear that Vukovic or any of the other geniuses on Council have figured out that the 2006 budgetary hole grew directly out of the 2005 budget fraud.

Vukovic couldn’t help himself though and kept on talking. He also talked about how closely Council and the mayor’s staff work together in this time of adversity. This came about 30 minutes after there was more discussion about how Council was still waiting on final budget numbers from the administration. Vukovic also repeated his utterly false claim that only the Mayor is responsible for the budget and finances. One person who disagrees with Vukovic is the state auditor, who was in town yesterday. She very clearly stated that the first and most important line of fiscal responsibility is with city Council. Whom do you think is right- a shabby public school teacher with a record of lies, falsification and incompetence or the state’s top fiscal officer?

Don’t try to tell Vukovic that Council is responsible and really don’t try to tell him that he’s personally responsible. If you do, he starts to whimper and cry that he spends a lot of time on the finances already. After all, just because Council voted themselves a pay raise last year so they could receive "full time" employee retirement benefits from the state, don’t expect them to work. Actually, you should expect your elected officials to be rather casual about their responsibilities. For example, if the chair of the finance committee would rather attend a charity Scrabble match than attend meetings on city business, he should be able to, even if the city is in a financial "crisis" caused directly by the actions of Council. (That really happened last night too.)

All kidding aside here for this note to Vukovic: You chose to run for office. No one forced you. Since you’re a public school teacher, you were likely ignorant of the duties that come with elected public service. But the fact remains that the Citizens of Marietta by and large don’t give a fig about your marriage or how much your wife complains. You were elected to serve and unfortunately were tapped to head the finance committee. If you don’t have the time or willingness to serve, get out now. As it is, you’re not doing anyone any good by spreading more lies and false information about the way you and others have mismanaged the city. You're certainly not doing anyone any good by bitching about your wife's bitching.

In the meantime, under Vukovic’s stately leadership, Council will continue to correct the 2005 two million-dollar hole on the backs of the MPD, the MFD, and all other city employees and Citizens while still pressing ahead with the Justice Center project. One more time, Citizens- if you’re not furious, you’re not paying attention.

A recap then of last night’s highlights:

-Councilpersons Shively and Burnworth follow Junior Nolan’s insightful lead.

-Shively and Burnworth attacked messengers instead of the message. (A concept familiar to critics of yours truly.)

-Shively and Burnworth are running for Mayor, along with about a dozen other people.

-Vukovic lied, distorted, covered up, ignored, and whined about the 2005 fraud.

-Vukovic also lied about the responsibility of Council to confront the mismanagement of city money.

More about all this and the coverage of it in the 'legitimate media' this weekend.

The Smoking Gun

2006-02-28T12:39:00.000-05:00

(Editor's note added Thursday- Make sure to check out the comments to read about bureaucratic 'runaround' at the state level and a corrected phone number.)

Yesterday, a group of accountants in town revealed exactly how fraud was perpetrated on the Citizens of Marietta by elected officials. That fraud directly led to the precarious state of the city’s General Fund, including and especially the overdraft last spring and the current hubbub about wage freezes and layoffs. Mind you, the accountants were far more circumspect in their comments, but their findings are quite clear about who is most responsible for the fraud.

Let’s start with this quote from a WMOA story on this topic from today: "The 2005 budget was built on what I would call an [sic] plugged number in it and that number on a budget of $9.9 million included $1.9 million that did not exist. It was not a source of revenue. It’s the observation that says from savings. The savings are investments of other fund balances and not a source of revenue. You can’t spend it twice. Somehow that $1.9 million was put into the budget to make it balance. If I was a member of city council or a member of the council finance committee that approved that budget I would be ashamed," said one of the accountants, who’s obviously unqualified for public office because he has a sense of shame. Read that again and make sure you understand its meaning. The 2005 budget relied upon nearly $2,000,000 in revenue that did not then, never would and never will exist. Here’s how WMOA summed it up: "[The accountants] believe a large part of the city’s current financial struggles can be tracked back to the 2005 budget, which [the accountant] said was plugged with a fictitious number in order to get it to balance." Now we know exactly how and why the General Fund collapsed and why it did so in 2005- because the 2005 budget was built on fiction.

Of course readers of this space already know the answer to the ‘who’ part of the riddle. (Unlike the poor sods at the Times. More about how wretchedly they’ve failed later.) There are precisely three persons directly responsible for the fraud of the 2005 budget: city auditor Sharon Adams, former councilman Art Fordham, and current assistant safety-service director Mike Scales. As they did with the 2006 budget, Adams and Scales authored the 2005 version. Because he was the chair of Council’s finance committee at the time, Art Fordham was directly responsible for oversight of the city’s finances and budget process. All three of these persons allowed a fraudulent budget to be passed into law.

"But Professor," some might be saying, "before you go farther, remember the Bonaparte quote above. In other words, how can you be sure those three didn’t simply make a mistake?" What happened with the 2005 budget was deliberate because it was an innovation. Put another way, the 2004 budget didn’t rely on two million dollars in fake ‘savings revenue’ or whatever bogus term was used at the time. It hadn’t been done before, so one of the three responsible persons must have had a thought to plug in a fake two million dollar revenue for the 2005 budget. The fraud was intentional.

Even the putrid Times states that the fraud was intentional, or does so in a way. The paper found space between today’s slew of weight loss stories and ‘spontaneous’ anti-smoking letters from 41 elementary school children to run a story about city government. (A note to public school teachers: why not spend time teaching your kids math and history instead of propaganda? Then they won’t end up as worthless reporters and public officials.) Here’s the key passage from the paper’s story: "Mullen said Monday that he believed the money was available because of figures sent to his office late last year from the city auditor." For some reason, the ‘auditor’ wasn’t available to talk to the Times Monday.

Also in the Times story is a claim that the city Treasurer "warned Mullen" against relying on the two million dollar figure. Let’s quote the passage to be very clear: "However, in an October 2005 [sic] Times’ article- three months before council approved the budget- City Treasurer Valerie Holley warned Mullen against trying to use the savings funds to balance the budget." So- the Times now claims that city Council passed the 2005 budget in December of 2005. Let’s pretend that the date is a typo and that Holley "warned" the Mayor in October of 2004. What is not mentioned in today’s article is whether or not the Treasurer "warned" the city auditor or "warned" any member of city Council about the scheme. This is an important point: Did the Treasurer (if she really knew about it in 2004) do enough to stop the fraud from happening?

One ignoramus who didn’t do enough and has never done enough is Councilman Vukovic. He was a member of the finance committee when the 2005 budget was passed into law (i.e., in 2004). He’s also been a member of that committee through several state audits. Those audits have repeatedly and clearly warned of the possibility of this exact kind of fraud. (For the complete list of ‘Observations’ and ‘Recommendations’ from the hometown accounts released yesterday, go to this WMOA page. [This isn’t favoritism. The Times didn’t publish the list.] -Ed.) Vukovic has presided over gross financial mismanagement of the city’s finances and has not taken corrective measures to see that oversight is in place, even though that’s precisely what the state auditors have repeatedly recommended in the past.

So what was the reaction of this jackass to the news that he is responsible for passing a two million-dollar fraud into law? He complained that the accountants went to the press before they went to Council with their findings. Vukovic likely suspects that was a ‘ploy’ of Mullen’s to get the performance audit approved and/or to smear the ‘auditor’ and Council. Frankly, yours truly doesn’t give a fig about why it was made public first, even if it is a Mullen ploy. Here’s why: if Mullen thought he was going to make himself look good, the hatchet job the Times did on him is a sore lesson learned; and more importantly, the public needed to know about this without it being filtered through Council. After all, they are to blame just as much as the ‘auditor’ and the Mayor.

Of course Mullen deserves blame here but not in the way the Times paints. Mullen is at fault for hiring and continuing to rely on Mike Scales as the assistant safety-service director. That position is the chief budget officer for the administration. Therefore, it was Scales’ responsibility to make sure the Mayor had good numbers. It was Adams’ responsibility to see that Scales had reliable information. Finally, it was Fordham’s responsibility to see that Adams and Scales were doing their jobs. But none of them were, at least in such a way that took the commonwealth into account.

Marietta’s public officials failed, as did the Times. Remember- it wasn’t that long ago that the paper ran a series of stories based on a "ten year analysis" of the city’s finances that concluded the current ‘crisis’ is due to ‘fixed costs’. Hey and look at that- those stories featured Scales and Adams as primary sources. Ain’t that a pip? As has been frequently mentioned in this space, the Times has devoted quite a serious amount of ink to showing Adams in a favorable light. The Times habitually reprints false and misleading stories about the finances based on gossip and innuendo from Adams. The short list includes: ‘skyrocketing’ cell phone bills, ‘skyrocketing’ overtime costs, ‘furnacegate’, excuses why state audit findings don’t matter, don’t apply to her and/or are the Mayor’s fault. Be prepared for a Times story in the next few days featuring the ‘auditor’ that explains why it was the Mayor’s fault she certified the corrupt 2005 budget. Here’s a hint for the forsaken lot who work at the Times: You should really get Fordham’s lies about this on record. Granted, the paper will treat the lies of Adams and Fordham as truth but having them on record will come in handy for the prosecutions, which is where this should end up.

Unfortunately, the Mayor and the accountants don’t quite see it that way, but then they’re just accountants and Moon Mullen. They are pressing for a performance audit. However, as readers of this space know, our comrades in Athens County underwent a special audit recently. In the case of the regional jail authority, the state auditors went in and rebuilt all the authority’s books from scratch. They had to do so because the fiscal officer had mucked up the works so bad no one could get a single clear snapshot of the finances. Such a situation has been staring Marietta in the face for years. Now there’s an added twist that three key persons in particular allowed a budget passed into law that was built on a two million-dollar fraud. A performance audit tweaks accounting procedures, cost allocations and the like. For it to be effective, the city has to know its own finances. Our once fair town certainly does not know that, thanks to three malfeasants. Therefore, a special audit should be conducted. Once the city’s financial picture is clear, then and only then would a performance audit make sense.

It comes down to this: Sharon Adams, Art Fordham and Mike Scales created the current financial crisis by relying on two million dollars that was never there and never would be. Vukovic was either a participant or, at best, a patsy, The four of them foisted a ruinous budget on the city for 2005 and all but one of them is also responsible for the 2006 budget. Citizens of our once fair town are seriously encouraged to call the state attorney general’s office at 614-466-4320 and state auditor’s office at 740-594-3300.

This is it, Marietta. We have proof that our elected officials deliberately mucked up our once fair town for unknown reasons (unless those reasons include laying off police and fire personnel, freezing wages, getting rid of other city employees and preventing certain persons from being reelected to Mayor). If the time for action is not now, it will never come.

Athens Adams

2006-02-26T09:15:00.000-05:00

Let’s take a time out to see what our comrades in nearby Athens County have been witnessing recently. For those that need justification for such a diversion, call it a case study. It turns out that the state auditor’s office has been investigating some very serious financial mismanagement by a public official named Adams. Yes, the name is a juicy coincidence but the activities and wrongdoing and the warnings involved will seem very familiar to readers of this space.

Yours truly was led down this rabbit hole by a story that appeared on the WMOA site Friday. This is the opening of that story: "A state audit shows a southeastern Ohio regional jail never billed the four counties it serves for more than $500,000 in medical bills. It also didn't ask 18 current and former employees who were given cell phones to repay more than $10,000 in personal calls." But it turns out that was just the tip of the iceberg. A Google search led to this story in the Athens Messenger. Here’s the key passage from the Messenger story: "Vicki Adams, who resigned as the [regional jail] fiscal officer in October, was found to owe the jail $1,670 for unpaid cell phone bills. Two findings, totaling $476, were also made for ‘public monies illegally expended.’ According to the auditor’s report, she used money from a special account (not included on the jail commission’s ledgers) to purchase a camcorder and ink cartridges and to give herself a loan. Adams has since paid that money back." So- the regional jail’s fiscal director didn’t collect over half a million dollars in revenue while misusing public funds for her personal good and keeping shady books. And her name was Adams.

Naturally yours truly had to go read the state auditor’s report on all this, which was made public last week. The regional jail is for whatever reason audited by the state every two years. The last regular audit report was released just about a year ago. However, someone or some entity requested that the state auditor’s office conduct a special audit, which began last fall. The exact reasons why the special audit was requested and by whom are unclear. However, this excerpt from the report (page 10) dated last week provides some clues as to why:

"While updating the Excel spreadsheet to track appropriations versus actual expenditures plus outstanding encumbrances, we noted the following:
- Encumbrances reported on the monthly financial statements were not usually valid and carried over from the date of entry until September, 2005 [when the special audit began- Ed.];
- Obligations were not encumbered until just prior to issuing the check; and
- The system reflected only appropriations for the General Fund Corrections, Utilities and Administration accounts. No appropriations were included for the Contingency account within the General Fund or for the Commissary Special Revenue Fund"

It turns out that prior to the special audit last fall, the regional jail’s fiscal officer didn’t keep accurate financial records and those records were poorly managed. Any of that sound familiar? Not only familiar, but also a way of life for Marietta’s fiscal officer. But there were other problems. One in particular was something called a "special account" that was opened by the woman we’ll call Athens Adams. What Athens Adams did was create a "special" fund that had its own account at a local bank and was pretty much off of the books, so only she knew what was going on with it.

So what was going on with it? Here’s what the state auditors found (from page 14 of the report released last week): "Check number 1093, dated January 25, 2005, issued to Victoria (Vicki) Adams from the General Special Account found at First National Bank [Account #: 233217 02], (otherwise known as the ‘Special Account’ or ‘Employee Services Bank Account’), in the amount of $110 was documented as a loan. Vicki Adams was the Fiscal Director for the Corrections Commission during this time and was the authorized signatory on this check. There was no other authorization for this expenditure documented. Upon Ms. Adams’s termination of employment on October 7, 2005, this amount had not been repaid through a payroll deduction and there was no other documentation that reflects the repayment of this loan." That’s right- the fiscal officer gave herself a ‘loan’ of public money that was never repaid. How could she even get away with such a thing in the first place? This passage from page 35 of the report shows how: "During the period under review, the [regional jail] Commission only required one signature on checks. The person signing the checks also posted the transactions to the ledgers and performed the bank reconciliation. This practice exposed the Commission to losses due to errors and irregularities…" Summation: the system was structured so that one person could wildly manipulate money, including for her personal use, like camcorders and personal cash loans. Whether or not the loans were used to finance shoe purchases is not mentioned in the audit report. Anyway, Athens Adams isn’t a confessed compulsive shoe fetishist.

Let’s step back and take another look at the big picture. Athens Adams was the chief financial officer of the regional jail authority and during her tenure, she not only failed in her public duties, such as collecting money rightfully owed to the authority that totaled roughly $500,000, she also manipulated the books so as to misuse what money there was available. The report released last week doesn’t say why Athens Adams failed to collect all that money, or the thousands owed by employees for cell phone bills. (It turns out one of the jail’s cooks had two cell phones billed to the jail authority.) All this really happened.

Moreover and more to the point for readers of 'MariettaWatch' is that all this was going on right under state auditors' noses. Remember- the jail was audited at least every two years, and some of the offenses detailed in last week’s report date back years. For example, the ‘special account’ was created in 2002. Even more offensive must be that state auditors had cited the jail back in 2002 for not billing medical expenses. (Page 13 of the 2002 report, which can be found right here.) Then last year, auditors reported the medical billing problem had been "Fully Corrected". (To be found, coincidentally, on page 13 of the 2005 report.) Then just last week, it was revealed the problem was back to the tune of half a million dollars.

In short, the financial problems were widespread, systemic and known to those responsible for oversight of the finances. Just like city Council receives state audit reports chock full of recommendations and warnings, the regional jail authority had been receiving reports with recommendations and warnings that did absolutely no good. Finally, the state completed a special audit last week that exposed just how awfully the finances had been managed and how it had been ripped off. But wait- even after all this, we may not know the full extent of the problems. Witness this passage from page two of last week’s report: "We [the state auditors] were not engaged to and did not perform an examination, the objective of which would be the expression of an opinion on these transactions. Accordingly, we do not express such an opinion. Had we performed additional procedures, other matters might have come to our attention that we would have reported to you." So they admit up front that they might not have uncovered all the shenanigans perpetrated by Athens Adams.

So it is that we now have concrete proof of several things: it is possible for a public entity to be audited repeatedly without uncovering deliberate and/or unintentional mismanagement; public officials can and do manipulate public funds both for personal reasons and sheer incompetence; that without effective and diligent oversight all the regular state audits in the world don’t make a bit of difference; but state auditors will conduct special audits if requested.

Last year at this time, the regional jail was plagued by an incompetent and corrupt fiscal officer who not only cost the jail several hundred thousands dollars due to mismanagement, she also misused public money for her own benefit. Today though, thanks to a special audit (not to be confused with a performance audit), the corrupt fiscal officer is gone and the jail has a reasonable chance of getting a handle on its finances. If any of this sounds good to you, make it clear to members of city Council, the Mayor and the auditor’s office in Athens (740-593-3300) that you think so.

Is the 2006 Budget Legal? And Other Lingering Questions

2006-02-23T09:26:00.000-05:00

Let’s start off with an item not to be found in any of the ‘legitimate media’, namely the theory that the 2006 budget as passed by city Council was not legal. Already yours truly can hear the skeptics saying ‘This time the Prof has really gone out where the busses don’t run. How can a budget be illegal?’ Fair question and it deserves explanation.

Recently, while yours truly was skimming past results of state audits for the citation that the city has no way of insuring accurate receipts from the parking lot, another citation demanded renewed attention. Several times over the past few years, and probably dating even further back, the city has been cited for allowing appropriations to exceed revenues. In other words, the city had said it was going to spend more money out of an account than was readily available. It turns out this is against state law, which is why the city has been cited for it by state auditors. (For a discussion of this, dating more than a year ago, click here. -Ed.) As has been amply reported in both the ‘legitimate media’ and here in the rogue netherworld of the blogosphere, the city’s 2006 budget as was passed into law on the first business day of the year had an anticipated shortfall of well over a million dollars. The appropriations exceeded the revenues for the entire city budget. Therefore the city’s 2006 budget is most likely illegal because it does what state law says should not be done.

Now comes the disappointing part. There’s really not much to do about it. If there were any sort of ‘punishment’ for breaking the particular section of state code, that punishment would have been dealt out a long time ago to several members of city government, most of which still blight our city. Instead, all state auditors can do as they’ve done so many times in the past is point out the ‘error’ and recommend that the city not do it again. The really sad part about the state audit processes, including and especially the irrelevant ‘performance’ audits, is for them to be truly effective a city must have a diligent set of elected officials that are truly interested in doing what’s best for Marietta and doing what the Citizens want done. Our once fair town certainly does not have such a set of elected officials.

Proof that the current crop of elected blubber is uninterested in doing their jobs is the latest revelation that members of Council are unaware that a sizable portion of their constituency does not want to spend over five million dollars on a new court building. Readers of this space will do well to keep a sharp eye on Councilman and dead bird enthusiast Randall Burnworth. Granted, his gifts of oration and sheer charisma make him hard to ignore, but pay special attention to him these days as he apparently believes he’s been charged from on high to deliver unto Marietta the new court and is working with the new judge to make it happen.

Burnworth and others are likely to continue making the argument that the city has spent over a million dollars on the justice center project so far, therefore stopping now would be a waste. This is classic government logic at its finest. It’s also the reason that the former judge was so eager to start actual work on the project before the end of last year. Once the government starts spending money, ‘tis reasoned that whatever the project and whatever the cost, it should been seen to its conclusion because money has already been spent on it. So it is that Burnworth and the other glitterati on Council argue that since a million has already been spent, we should spend another five million or the original million will have been wasted. Remember now- these people were elected to show off how stupid they are, so be gentle.

On second thought, don’t be so gentle. As was reported in the Times yesterday a firefighter showed up to ask Council why it was going ahead with such a sloppily planned project. Here’s the response as appeared in the paper: "Councilman Sam Gwinn, D-1st Ward, chairman of the lands, buildings and parks committee, suggested [firefighter] Moore and A.J. Linscott, a Marietta police officer, attend a finance committee meeting to talk about the city’s financial status. There’s a finance committee meeting scheduled for 5 p.m. Thursday." Is that the welcoming open spirit that members of Council claim resides in committee meetings? If one shows up at a finance meeting to talk about the justice center, what are the odds that Head Wound Harry will allow that to happen? Despite the ignorant, illiterate and rude attitudes of Council members, everyone who cares about the city’s budget ‘crisis’ should be that meeting today. That’s when the Coven of Cowards will come up with excuses to not transfer gobs of money from the water and sewer funds into the sickly General Fund.

Here’s another fact to remember that seems to have been lost about the justice center: it has essentially no parking at all. The plan requires that the city leach off other spaces from lots throughout the city and reserve them for the court. In fact, the city will be losing rather a lot of parking spaces where employees currently park because the brick vomit will be built on the lot where those spaces are now. That’s after an ancient tree or two are destroyed of course. Anyway the point is all the parking for the new justice center has to come from other parking lots in town while those other lots will be forced to absorb the influx. A quick check at a map shows that all those lots are at least a couple blocks from the new facility, so what advantage that will be gained for the handicapable population is unclear in terms of parking at least.

Oh that's right, the city plans to pave over green space on Front Street to give the post office a few more parking spaces. Apparently the open spaces always available next to the bridge and the Becky aren't close enough. Just more great city planning in a once great city.

Dispatches from Adamsland

2006-02-18T08:22:00.000-05:00

The news of the week comes from Adamsland, where numbers mean nothing and there is no oversight. Those who read the comments in this space already know that the city ‘auditor’ has released her monthly report regarding the city’s finances. The report is available online by clicking right here.

Upon opening the report, the first thing that jumps out is the activity in the city’s General Fund. According to the ‘auditor’ the General Fund had a negative income of nearly $300,000. Go read it yourself to see. The ‘auditor’ doesn’t claim spending outpaced revenues by that amount, she claims the revenue itself was a negative amount. Granted that given the flexible realities of accounting and government accounting especially, there are circumstances when such things need to be done for purely bookkeeping reasons, but the timing and the amounts involved make this smell.

Going down the list of city accounts, the next interesting line is the city’s community development account. According to the ‘auditor’, in the month of January the development account spent roughly $226,000 or more than half of its entire yearly budget. Readers of this space know that the ‘auditor’ has been caught two years in a row providing erroneous information about that very account and is still trying to perpetrate fraud on the city by manipulating the figures to this day. And now the budget for the year has already been half spent. Coincidence? Probably not.

Farther down the page, one finds the municipal court’s capital improvement fund. Lo and behold, that account spent nearly $50,000 in the month of January. Yours truly presumes this answers the question ‘where is the money coming from to keep driving the hall of justice project?’

Last and certainly not least, take note of how much is in the water and sewer revenue funds, lines 500 and 501 in the monthly report. The two accounts had a total of $1,442,775.25 in them at the end of January. Why is that important? Because this coming Thursday, Council’s finance committee is meeting to decide how much should be taken out of those accounts and put into the General Fund. For the past few years, there has been a law on the books stating that certain amounts of money should be taken from the water and sewer funds and put into the General Fund but that law has been ignored, depriving the General Fund of some tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars. The state auditors cited the city twice for ignoring that law, because they had recommended the city pass the law in the first place. Yours truly has written about this issue more than once over the past year.

Back to why it’s important to know there’s nearly $1.5 million in the water and sewer funds. It’s very likely that someone at this week’s committee meeting will suggest that the city cannot afford to transfer all the money owed to the General Fund as detailed by law. Chances are it will be Vukovic who will have ‘concerns’ about transferring the money. Why? Because it was Vukovic’s mentor, Art Fordham, who kept the money out of the General Fund all these years and Vukovic has shown no signs of being his own man yet.

An aside here to dispel the Mayor's babble about the city parking lot. Yours truly refers to this quote from page five of the 2003 state audit reportmanagement letter: "The City has no process in place to verify the parking lot revenue." This was mentioned by yours truly a year ago here.

Don’t look for any of this in the pages of the Times. It’s nearly painful to see how far they’ve fallen these days. The latest example is a side-by-side comparison of a WMOA story from this week and a Times ‘editorial’ from the very next day. From the WMOA story: "Caroline Beidler lives in Pinehurst, the state’s most at-risk neighborhood for long-term health hazards from industrial air pollution. ‘We have chronic breathing problems often referred to as the 'Mid-Ohio Valley Crud and asthma, lots of asthma,’ Beidler said. ‘Our homes are covered with black soot. We are awakened in the middle of the night to a blanket of noxious odors filling our homes, even a cold winter’s night when our doors and windows are locked tight. Bad air days, the ones I can taste and smell, average about 45 per year. But that is just when the wind is blowing in my direction. Someone is always in the path.’" And now from the Times editorial the next day: "Those who live in Washington County and care about the quality of the air we breathe are, no doubt, familiar with Caroline Beidler of Pinehurst. ... In a written statement issued through the OEC earlier this week, Beidler said: ‘We have chronic breathing problems often referred to as the Mid-Ohio Valley Crud, and asthma, lots of asthma. Our homes are covered in black soot. We are awakened in the middle of the night to a blanket of noxious odors filling our homes, even on a cold winter’s night when our doors and windows are locked tight. Bad air days, the ones I can taste and smell, average about 45 per year. But that’s just when the wind is blowing in my direction. Someone is always in the path.’" Amazing similarity, it must be admitted. Someone remind me why people pay to read that rag.

More Highlights from the Coven's Book of Good Governance

2006-02-15T13:58:00.000-05:00

Here are some quick observations on ‘facts’ that have appeared in the last two days regarding the Coven of Cowards. There's more that could be said, but thinking up new ways of saying 'stupid' and 'corrupt' isn't very fun.

First off, there was yesterday’s story about the river front gentrification project. In the Times story, we learn that recently the US Army Corps of Engineers recently spent about $200,000 "to stabilize the bank, but it hasn’t been enough to steady the eroding land" according to a member of city Council. Council’s answer to the problem? Spend $42,000 more and have the city do the work. That makes perfect sense.

Then there are the latest fantastical numbers from the city ‘auditor’ in today’s paper. Let’s go through this very slowly. Here’s one excerpt from a story today: "The city auditor’s monthly balance sheet for January showed a $533,766 ending balance for the month. The figure would have been $23 without the Gutberlet bequest." Pop quiz- How much does that mean the ‘auditor’ thinks the Gutberlet money totals? Right- $533,743, but then read this selection: "As of Tuesday, the current balance of the general fund was $606,698. Without half of the bequest the balance would have been $66,672, Adams said." The interesting thing here is that when one subtracts $533,743 from $606,968, the answer is $72,955, not $66,672.

Ah well, let’s not worry about six grand right now. Let’s also not worry about the fact that Council is in fact using the Gutberlet money to prop up the General Fund, and is doing so even after forswearing the possibility of doing so. Perhaps we now know why the state auditor’s office refused to go along with Council’s scheme for a "Gutberlet Fund" and that’s because Council was already using the money to hold the General Fund together. Therefore, the state refused to help Council pretend that they weren’t using the cash for the General Fund because the city has been doing exactly that.

Also in today’s Times story, there is more proof that the Mayor’s staff is utterly hopeless. For weeks now, the Mayor's flunky and assistant safety-service director has been promising to deliver ‘projections for the city’s costs’ for the rest of the year. Yesterday, those figures were not available still or again or unsurprisingly, whichever you prefer.

Last and least, in today’s story about yesterday’s finance committee meeting, we are treated to this quote about Head Wound Harry: "Vukovic said he will begin looking monthly at actual costs and compare them against budgeted costs as the auditor’s [sic]recommended. [Actually the auditor's office didn't recommend that. Read this post to read exactly what they did say. -PC] The audit committee, however, will only look at the reports on a quarterly basis, with meetings preliminarily scheduled for March, June, September and December. 'It’s going to cost us more time when we do that,' Vukovic said." So apparently what we’re to believe now is that when Vukovic ran for reelection and accepted a reappointment to Council’s finance committee, he had absolutely no idea that he would have to spend time reviewing actual versus budget numbers. That actually seems plausible because Vukovic’s mentor and significant other, Art Fordham, did not take this basic step as head of the finance committee. Okay, to be fair, state auditors provided proof of that by writing up the city for being so careless. All Vukovic did is complain about having to do the job he sought and was elected to do.

The Mayor's Performance Audit Anxiety

2006-02-13T12:45:00.000-05:00

Wait a minute… hold on now… Did Mayor Mullen really suggest paying state auditors to spend six months looking at operational faults with the city’s money management that won’t help either in the short, near, or middle term with the city’s financial 'crisis'? And when that six-month bought-and-paid-for audit is over, the results won’t be binding in any way, but will instead consist of ‘recommendations’ that the city can follow or not? And isn’t the city audited yearly almost gratis now and haven’t those audits generated literally pages and pages and pages of ‘recommendations’ that have been almost universally ignored, even though some of them would result in big cash money for the city immediately? The answer to all these questions, dear readers is ‘Yes’. The ‘performance audit’ scheme cooked up by Mayor Squishy will, in other words, have absolutely no effect on the city and we get to pay for the privilege. It will have no effect because the results aren’t binding. As with the yearly audits, the city can and most likely would ignore what state officials told them.

City officials would most likely ignore state auditors even if the auditors told the city how to get a few hundred thousand dollars into the General Fund right now. Don’t believe yours truly? How about this? City officials have already ignored what state auditors have told them about how to get a few hundred thousand dollars into the General Fund. For proof, read this WMOA story from today. In it one finds this passage: "While revenues for water and sewer payments are kept in an enterprise fund for future water and sewer projects, city ordinance provides for a certain portion of the consumer’s bill to be put back into the general fund to help cover the city’s cost of administering water and sewer services. It’s called a cost allocation plan and the city implemented a five-year formula-based plan in 2002 at the urging of the state office. However, the state audit report reveals that the cost allocation planned by city law at the state’s recommendation was not fully satisfied in 2004." This may sound familiar to readers of this space because all this mess has been the subject of two citations by state auditors for two years in a row and many discussions in this space. (Click here for one. -Ed.)

At some point before 2002, state auditors suggested that Council set up a plan to take money out of the water and sewer revenue funds to place in the General Fund. Like the WMOA story says, the revenue funds can’t usually be touched for anything other than water and sewer projects. However, since there is no reality to government accounting, all that had to be done was pass a law that said otherwise. A formula was attached to the law that lays out exactly how to determine the amount of money to be put in the General Fund. The law is still on the books today and is called "Ordinance 90(02-03)".

So- the city had a plan in place to start a brand new flow of cash from the revenue funds to the General Fund and the plan had the approval of state auditors, unlike the harebrained and dishonest scheme for the Gutberlet bequest. What we know now and have known for over a year (at least readers of this space have) is that the plan was never followed and therefore the General Fund has been deprived of somewhere approaching $300,000, at least. Mind you, that’s a guess and it has to be, but more about that in a bit.

The important thing to grasp right now is that a few years ago state auditors laid out a plan to provide the city’s General Fund with a new and healthy influx of cash every year; that plan was passed into law by city Council and was then almost entirely ignored despite two separate admonitions from the same state auditors; that the money, totaling at least $200,000 was not transferred into the General Fund, maybe even while that fund was overdrawn last year. And on top of all this, Mayor Squishy wants to pay for more auditors to make recommendations that don’t have to be followed. Huh?

Before going further, a discussion on the actual figures involved in this scam and who perpetrated it and why. The glaring and damning part of the WMOA story is this: "Despite numerous written requests for information going back over more than a month, the city auditor has so far declined to verify information on the exact amount paid to the fund in 2005 or planned for 2006." Why the WMOA reporter has not filed a lawsuit against the city ‘auditor’ for violation of the state’s open records laws is not clear. (The reporter is also casting some doubt on Head Wound Harry's recent claim that no one in the city is covering up, holding back or distorting information.) What is clear is that the city ‘auditor’ and certain members of city Council are absolutely guilty of shorting the General Fund by some hundreds of thousands of dollars. Moreover, they must be conscious of their guilt, and have been for at least a year when state auditors first reminded Council to obey their own laws by putting more money into the General Fund.

Now why on Earth would Council and the ‘auditor’ keep money out of the General Fund? First, recall exactly whom we’re discussing here: Sharon Adams, Art Fordham and Tom Vukovic. None of these people wants Mayor Mullen to be seen as succeeding in any way, shape or form. As the ‘auditor’ and the two senior members of the finance committee, those three people bear direct responsibility for depriving the General Fund of the money provided for in the ‘allocation plan’ from the state auditors. Given the Times' long history of covering up for Sharon Adams, maybe that’s why there has not yet been any mention of this scandal and crime by the Marietta Times.

Or maybe it’s just shoddy reporting. Based on the Times version of the ‘performance audit’ story, it’s unclear that the paper has any clue about any of the material above. One improvement is Justin McIntosh’s realization that such an audit did not in fact happen on Thursday as he had reported earlier. Mind you, the Times story was worth a read, but only for the chuckles. Most precious was the whining by city recreation director and part-time model Donna Medley, who complained that other than yearly pay raises her department has not received any pay raises. Medley also saw fit to complain about the workload of her department, including running the pool, even though she schemed and plotted to make sure she was running the pool. Anyway, the Times has latched on to an impeccable and obviously sage-like source for the city’s financial ‘crisis’ and that sage source is Donna Medley, thus continuing the Times’ ongoing tradition of excellence.

Leaving the Times to wallow in their own filth, let’s return to the ‘allocation plan’ and why Adams, Fordham and Vukovic actively and willfully deprived the General Fund of serious money. The reason why they did so is right at the end of the WMOA story: "Mullen said it might be possible to repair the general fund by fixing old bookkeeping errors – as opposed to making cuts in operations." In other words, if the bookkeeping errors had not occurred, we wouldn’t be hearing about the city’s financial ‘crisis’ these days. Clever readers can probably guess the next step: If the ‘crisis’ amounts to bookkeeping errors that can be fixed by simply obeying the law and moving gobs of cash where most needed, why is this called a crisis at all?

The answer to that question brings us right back to Adams, Fordham and Vukovic. They wanted the ‘crisis’ to cripple Mullen. Granted, some of the problem is due to sheer ignorance, such as Adams never having recorded interest payments to city accounts, but a lot of this ‘crisis’ is now exposed for what it is: a willfully manufactured manipulation of city finances for personal agendas (because let’s not forget Adams’s additional pleasure at hampering the MFD among other things).

The important thing to remember here is that it’s not like any of this fake ‘crisis’ is causing serious problems. For example, it’s not like the fire department budget got cut by a few hundred thousand dollars just because Sharon Adams hasn’t been doing her job. And it’s not like the police department is cutting back on overtime because no one on Council can figure out how corrupt Adams is. No, wait- actually, it’s exactly like that.

Just to make it clear to everyone, it’s very likely not a coincidence that the justice center project is still being crammed forward underneath all the jabber about a ‘crisis’. Undoubtedly Adams’s sole desire now is to see the Milton Nuzum Memorial Hall of Hooey built and she’s got plenty of willing accomplices on Council to enable her. She’s been able to manipulate the finances before to get a gigantic boondoggle built- Mike Gulliver’s money losing super deluxe cement pond. Anyone else notice a pattern?

(A quick final word to the commentator who requested more about the civil lawsuit against the city ‘auditor’. Other than the original anonymous comment that pointed out how and where to find out public information about the suit and these plus some earlier comments about the matter, nothing more will be said about it. Simply put, it occurs to your humble narrator that the suit actually bespeaks in Adams’ favor. If she were guilty of embezzling money, one might presume she’d be able to make her payments. As such, she remains presumed to be quite innocent of thievery but not knavery.)

Marietta- Where Crappy Parking Resides

2006-02-10T08:25:00.000-05:00

It’s too bad that the city is facing such a dire financial ‘crisis’ these days, because yours truly believes that someone needs to spend some cash on cheap calculators for every member of city government. Problem with that scheme is that it’s highly doubtful any of those people would know how to use calculators. Already it’s painfully obvious that the city ‘auditor’ has no idea about technological innovations from the past seventy years, most especially in the realm of numbers. Apparently Mayor Mullen is also blissfully unaware of calculators, or even math in general.

How else to explain the latest hoopla about parking meters, other than Mullen’s complete lack of sense? Over the past few days, a number of stories about this issue have appeared in the ‘legitimate media’ and when taken together, they don’t exactly tout the benefits of parking meters. Moreover, they also provide yet more evidence that someone in city government is playing fast and very loose with figures and the truth.

Let’s take a look at some info from a WMOA story about the plan to add parking meters to the Parking Partners lot. From that story: "Last year, the lot saw revenues of nearly $50,000, while expending more than $35,000 for operations." The first concern anyone should have upon reading that is about the accuracy of the $50,000 figure. It’s known that there are roughly 100 monthly parking spaces that cost $25 per month to rent. Assuming that those spaces are all filled all year, the city (theoretically) earns $30,000 per year from the monthly spaces. That means the 100 hourly spaces in the lot must generate $20,000. But there’s a problem with that theory and it’s in another WMOA story from today.

It turns out that the city made exactly $7,736 last year from all parking meters in town. Here’s a quote from today’s story: "Last year, the city levied $24,834 in revenues from 2,707 parking tickets. Collections from meters earned $7,736." Yes, all parking meters. Not only does that mean the city loses money every year on parking meters and parking enforcement, it means that someone was lying about the income of the Parking Partners lot. If every parking meter in the city were in that lot and that revenue was added to the $30,000 generated from monthly parking, the result is a bit shy of $50,000.

See how valuable a cheap calculator is? See how dangerous cheap governance is? If not, yours truly hastens to remind readers that the city also pays the salary of a parking enforcement official, on top of the salaries that have been paid to the Parking Partners attendants. Together, all those salaries total roughly $76,000. Now we can compare real numbers to see the bottom line. Including meter revenues, tickets and monthly rentals, it appears the city makes roughly $63,000 while paying out $76,000 in parking salaries. That means the parking program for downtown costs the city $13,000 a year. Some may be thinking "Well then Mayor Squishy is right- eliminate the lot attendants and whammo! Instant profit." There’s a problem though because the planning wizards in charge of the still-not-quite-dead-yet justice center need to gobble up well over one hundred already existing parking spaces for that project. That’s because on top of being the red brick equivalent of lumpen tofu, the justice center has no parking at all. And don’t forget, Mayor Squishy is talking about spending another $15,000 to $20,000 just to install the meters.

One last bit about how loose the truth is these days especially when it comes to parking meters. In a story from yesterday’s Times, one reads this: "Mullen said he sent a memorandum to Marietta Police Chief Brett McKitrick on Wednesday, asking him to identify a hand-held monitoring device that would work best for the city and to find out how much it would cost." It’s likely McKitrick already knows the cost since this idea has been floating around for at least a year, or in other words the last time Citizens were trying to convince government that no one really wants or probably needs parking meters. This is another case of an idea long forgotten seeming new and shiny to the dolts at the Times and in the offices of King Shidas (a tempting though slightly vulgar name for the Mayor- unlike King Midas, everything that Mullen touches turns to poo).

Another development this week that should be mentioned is the latest on Marietta’s $6,000,000 cement pond and its highly able and chic manager, recreation director Donna Medley. Earlier in the week, the Times ran a story about how Council has agreed to charge more for family passes to the pool. You know, the one built using money intended for low-income Citizens. The story included these words: "Councilman Tom Vukovic, [Head Wound Harry], wanted to know how much the increase in season passes would bring to the city, but Medley didn’t know. 'It’s not going to be significant enough to offset the additional increase in utilities,' Medley said, adding the recreation commission suggested the increase to help offset the increased utilities cost but not cover it. ... 'We put the money in the budget to cover for the (utility) increase,' said Mike Scales, assistant safety-service director [ASS director]. 'The income’s there to cover it.'" So- Council passed a rate increase that is guaranteed not to make up operating shortfalls and those shortfalls have been compensated for elsewhere in "the budget". Actually, the pool manager doesn’t even know how much the facility is projected to realize from the price increase. Odd thing to ask for a rate increase without knowing how much it’s supposed to make. Mind you, all this information about the cost of operating the pool and its yearly budget come from ASS director Scales and city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams. Now, does anyone believe those numbers? Does anyone believe the pool has made money? Before you answer, remember that in 2005, $160,000 was taken out of the Smith Trust Fund to pay for work on the pool (that was the last of the Fund money, for those not in the know). Still, with Head Wound Harry, Donna Medley, ASS director Scales and the ‘auditor’ involved, what could wrong?

Finally, a quick word on the hypocrisy of the Times. Remember the ‘Sequelle’ stories about how someone had filed a civil lawsuit against a woman who used to be the city’s development director? The Times saw fit to print more than one story about the allegations in the lawsuit and some of those stories delved into the ancient history of the person, including unsavory details about youthful indiscretions and rumors. Funny then that the Times has yet to print a story about a fiduciary civil lawsuit filed in Marietta court against a sitting public official. Funnier still that the person being sued has admitted in the Times that she has a low-grade mental disorder that compels her to spend money on herself for the sake of ‘self-esteem’. Perhaps the Times is just guilty of snobbery, refusing to run stories about lawsuits worth less than, say, $10,000. On the other hand, it may just be that Times editor Jennifer Houtman has other criteria for choosing what stories to run. For example, say the paper had wasted a lot of ink defending, explaining and endorsing a certain public official, like an auditor. Let’s also say there is a ‘rogue’ media outlet that routinely chastises the paper for its lack of serious coverage about that auditor and for the paper’s failings in general. Yours truly submits that it’s just possible Houtman is covering for such a public official right now because she’s done so in the past and certainly doesn’t want to ‘legitimize’ the charges leveled in this space. To do so would mean utter failure for Houtman personally, so don’t look for serious coverage about the personal and professional failings of a certain public official any time soon in the Times, at least not while Houtman works there.

(PS- Yours truly has no intention of vivisecting the Times story comparing the budget ‘crisis’ of 20-odd years ago to the ‘crisis’ now. It is painfully obvious that someone suggested that the Times staff read its own archive for once. The headline, "Some contend city’s money troubles are part of a cycle", reveals it’s an opinion piece. Stories based on hard facts from reliable sources don’t include the words "some contend". Example- some contend that the Earth is flat while some contend that mole people live in the hollowed out center of the Earth. Therefore the contentions of ‘some’ aren’t newsworthy especially when the reporter in question has no idea if the Earth is flat or hollow, or if that reporter looks like a mole person.)

How to Nickel and Dime Your Way to a Million Dollars

2006-02-08T08:03:00.000-05:00

Quick- what’s the easiest, quickest and most welcome way that Council can increase revenues for Marietta? Mind you, it should be a way to generate money that merchants, Citizens and visitors alike will applaud. And don’t forget the 2006 budget that was made law by Council is short over a million dollars, so the method needs to generate a lot of cash.

If you guessed ‘install more parking meters downtown’ you’d be absolutely right. No, this isn’t a joke. Mayor Doodle is seriously talking about putting more parking meters downtown. Since parking meters are wildly unpopular with just about everyone, one might presume Mayor Squishy’s plan would at least generate a lot of cash for the city. Wrong again. Squishy himself claims that the meters only generate $50,000 a year before operating costs. Hardly enough to cover a million-dollar crisis (and most likely an inaccurate number provided by either the 'auditor' or the assistant safety-service director, neither of whom know the first thing about Marietta's finances), so maybe Squishy wants to raise the parking rates to help generate more cash. No, according to this WMOA story, the Mayor wants to actually reduce the rates. It’s all like a bad joke, except that it isn’t.

So let’s get this straight. Thus far, those who are absolutely responsible for manufacturing the financial ‘crisis’ have managed to find exactly three solutions for the problem they have created: make people pay more for every possible government service, cut back on every possible government service, and seriously contemplate shutting the government down one day a week. Solutions not considered by Council or Mayor Mush: hire someone to perform a thorough audit of all Sharon Adams’s illegal manipulation of city finances, provide substantial and effective oversight of finances, and do not build the multi-million dollar justice center.

Next time on Mayor Squishy’s "How to Run Your Town Like a Moron" series, we’ll learn how to generate more cash for your town through the magic of pet defecation tickets.

(PS- Those who care about the Mayor's outstanding idea to bring in more parking meters should pay very close attention to this line from the WMOA story: "The issue will be discussed further at another committee meeting scheduled for Tuesday, February 21, at 5:00." If you care at all about this topic, plan to be at that meeting. )

Since the Times Doesn't Print Corrections Online...

2006-02-04T08:24:00.000-05:00

For the benefit of those unfortunate people who still read the Times, here are some corrections to the story that ran on Friday about this week’s regular Council meeting.

The story in question contained this passage: "'I don’t mind people criticizing ... but I think you ought to at least be accurate when you’re going to criticize,' Vukovic said in reference to Crandall’s suggestion that the city didn’t consult with department leaders before making budget cuts and that he limited her comments and questions." Actually, Vukovic NEVER denied that department heads were not consulted before budget cuts were made. That’s because department heads were NOT consulted before the cuts were made. Also, Head Wound routinely cuts people off in committee meetings by claiming that time is short and the committee has to ‘move on’.

Even more inaccurate was the Times’ version of the Mayor Mullen’s babble about a ‘performance audit’. Here is the passage in question: "The Ohio Auditor’s Office is coming to Marietta next week to perform an audit on the city’s finances." THIS IS COMPLETELY UNTRUE. The officials from the state office are coming to town to discuss the POSSIBILIY of a performance audit. All Mullen has done is invite the officials into town to talk; they will not be performing an audit at this time. One might think journalists of such stature would take the time to call the state auditor’s office to double-check this fact. Readers are encouraged to do so for themselves. They will learn there is NO performance audit scheduled for Marietta.

So what we learned from the Times this week is that reporters are not required to check facts. This is of course no surprise to most readers/victims of the paper, but there’s sure a heck of a lot of proof this week. They include the two glaring factual errors described above as well as one from earlier in the week when the paper reported that state officials had approved the creation of the special funds for the Gutberlet gift. To add insult to injury the story from Friday repeats the false claim that two separate accounts were created for the gift. For those keeping score at home, that means there are three substantial factual errors in the one story about Thursday's Council meeting.

Just another stellar week at the Times. Have you canceled your subscription yet?

(PS- There is absolutely no news in the weekend edition of the paper, even for humorous purposes. Also, yours truly allowed a comment regarding an official’s personal affairs to be posted while rejecting another. One is verifiable public knowledge and the other was about shacking up.)

Everybody’s Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Vukovic

2006-02-03T09:30:00.000-05:00

Last night’s regular Council meeting was regular in all senses of the word. By which of course your humble narrator means that there was the usual mix of lies and willful ignorance and in the end nothing got done.

Let’s start with Head Wound Harry Vukovic’s lies. The Citizen who railed against Council for the better part of an hour a couple weeks ago returned last night and kept her comments to five minutes. During that time, she raised the issues of the city ‘auditor’ providing inaccurate information to Council and the public, the fact that city department heads were not consulted before their budgets were slashed, the fact that a reporter found a one hundred thousand dollar error, that the budget wizards Adams and Scales were unable to provide the amount of the cuts and that public comments in committee meetings are about as welcome as plague rats.

Between the time the Citizen spoke and the end of the meeting, Vukovic looked like he had the weight of the world on his broad, manly shoulders. When he began to speak at the end of the meeting, Vukovic said he was outraged at the Citizen’s comments. Did Vukovic go on to then deny that the ‘auditor’ is unable to provide timely and accurate account information? No. Did Head Wound deny that department heads were kept in the dark about the budget cuts? No. Did he deny that no city employee was responsible for finding the $100,000 ‘error’ in the development department budget? No. Instead, Head Wound simply lied that committee meetings are open and joyous celebrations of democracy. He then went on to lie that no public officials are engaged in hiding or distorting information.

So- Head Wound didn’t deny that the ‘auditor’ flubbed the development budget, hide budget cuts from department heads and that the city has to rely on a radio reporter to do the auditor’s job. Rather, Head Wound chose to lie that public officials in Marietta are not engaged in providing false or no information to the public. Those readers out there who’ve had the experience of trying to get information about the justice center, municipal court salaries and costs, various shenanigans with the general fund and so on know full well that public officials are actively hiding or distorting information. And now you also know that Vukovic will lie about all of these things rather than admit he’s a failure.

The most precious moment of Vukovic’s lying tirade was admonishing the Citizen that no one can get a sense of the budget from attending just one finance committee meeting. On presumes he knows what he’s talking about in this instance because Vukovic has been a member of that same committee for years and just recently admitted that he still needs to ‘learn more about the budget process’.

The second interesting development from last night’s meeting was that the state auditor torpedoed the schemes of Council regarding the Gutberlet gift. Specifically, the state refused to allow Marietta to create a special fund for the gift. This of course came as news to those piteous Citizens out there who still read the Marietta Times. These words appeared in the ‘newspaper’ just three days ago: "It will mean the money will likely sit in an account that was recently approved to be set up by the state auditor’s office." Times’ inaccuracies aside, here is the real state of the Gutberlet gift: half of it is locked away in a certificate of deposit until January of 2007 and the other half is sitting in the general fund most likely to be spent on the Justice Center.

Yours truly had to laugh ruefully last night as the members of the Coven debated on what to do with the Gutberlet gift now that their original scheme was denied. No one suggested using the money on the Armory. Since Mrs. Gutberlet specified that half the money should go to the Armory, it’s not unreasonable to think that maybe she’d like all of it spent on the Armory. Or at least use half of the gift to pay for a new roof while the other half is locked away from any use. But instead of suggesting that, it seems that most members of Council feel the need to "keep an eye" on the money so that it doesn’t "fade into the ether". Apparently it hasn’t yet occurred to the fearless leaders on Council that under normal circumstances, that is to say in a city that has an auditor who follows the law, there is no way on Earth that money would "fade away". By their repeated statements about needing to watch the money, members of Council seem to almost recognize that as long as the money sits in the general fund, there’s a very good chance that ‘auditor’ Adams will disregard the law and decency once again and just spend it.

Yours truly suspects that the Coven wants to make sure the $500,000 goes unspent for something else. Let’s not forget that when discussing the justice center project, it’s been widely admitted that the court would be about $500,000 short in getting the project going. Does anyone think it’s a coincidence that a notice about the justice center returning to the planning commission appeared in the paper hours before the Gutberlet gift scheme fell apart?

So here’s what we learned last night from Council- the finance committee chair tacitly admits that the city ‘auditor’ doesn’t provide timely and accurate information; that members of Council feel the need to ‘keep an eye’ on the general fund so that $500,000 doesn’t ‘fade into the ether’; that despite all of the ‘institutional memory’ on Council, their scheme for the Gutberlet gift was rejected by state officials; and that Vukovic looks like he needs a shower. Fair cop- that last one was just a shameless personal dig. But it’s true.

(PS- Yours truly is presuming that Mullen's talk about a 'performance audit' was just that- talk. Note that such an audit is not planned.)

REVEALED: Council’s Playbook for 2006

2006-02-02T08:30:00.000-05:00

Your humble narrator now presents the game plan Council is working off of to make 2006 the best year in Marietta’s history.

Step One: Ask the two persons most often cited by state auditors for breaking the law and breaking financial protocols to write the city’s 2006 budget. To really make the most of this step, make sure the authors don’t consult with any departments when writing the budget.

Step Two: Pass the budget on the first day in office. That way those department heads can read about how deep their budgets have been cut in the media nice and early in the year. Also at this time, reveal to the city that there is now a financial ‘crisis’ since the budget as written will be $1.2 million short.

Step Three: Council should act like it has no idea where the ‘crisis’ came from and therefore has to rely on information about the budget by the two lawless and inept individuals who wrote it.

Step Four: When department heads start complaining about little details like not having enough money to make payroll, deny the amount of cuts made to the budget and/or blame it on ‘the administration’.

Step Five: Force the MPD to cut back on overtime since no one in Marietta wants the streets to be safer. Also force the MFD to cut back because everyone knows they don’t do anything anyway; and just for kicks, take away the all the revenues from the EMS fees and dump them into the general fund, even though the EMS fees would not exist had the MFD not brought the idea to council.

Step Six: When Citizens start showing up at Council meetings to complain about how asinine Council is behaving, reinstate the ‘five minute rule’. Make sure this rule does not apply to those who’ve been elected.

Step Six-A: Council should never miss the opportunity to try and convince Citizens that regular Council meetings are not the place to discuss public business. Instead, Citizens should be directed to go to committee meetings. Of course those meetings will still be held in the afternoon so that Citizens cannot attend and Council members can make it home nice and early to their charming and lovely spouses.

Step Seven: Council should force useless and completely unwelcome departments like the MFD, MPD and the health department to take cuts while Council itself enjoys a pay raise. If someone should ask why a pay raise for those who complain about having to work late (hence the afternoon committee meetings), remind people that managing a city this poorly is not easy.

Step Eight: Should anyone prove that the city ‘auditor’ has made gigantic miscalculations (say a 20 percent error in the amount of money available to the development department), make only as many changes as are needed for the ‘miscalculation’ in question. By no means should Council ever go back to double check any of the rest of the work done by the ‘auditor’.

Step Nine: Once everyone in town is convinced that there really is a multi-million dollar financial ‘crisis’, go ahead with building the multi-million dollar justice center.

Step Ten: Raise all the fees in town and shut down government offices one day a week, thereby making government more expensive and less accessible.

Step Eleven: Pray that everyone blames Mayor Mullen for the problems. This is also another reason not to hold the 'auditor' accountable for all her crimes.

Step Twelve: Stand back and bask in the warm glow of good governance.

How can the Coven of Cowards go wrong with such winning strategies?

(Two last things here, the first to the Coven president Bertram here on the occasion of his reinstating the ‘five minute rule’: Yours truly was surprised to learn that a ‘lawyer’ of your corpulence is scared of a 120-pound librarian. Or did Vukovic ask you to protect him from the obviously dangerous librarian? Secondly, was anyone else surprised to learn that the suggestion for a four-day week came from recreation ‘director’ Medley? That’s a joke of course because a four-day week would mean more work for her.)

Do Drunken Balinese Sailors Govern Marietta?

2006-01-31T17:34:00.000-05:00

An Analysis of Today’s News

The news of the day is not only filled to excess with evidence that our once fair city is currently being run by a nest of nincompoops, but also that the Marietta Times is still driven by what appears first in this space. Since the Times continues to be a stale joke, we’ll save that for last. First, let’s take a look at all the ever-accumulating proof that those who’ve been elected and/or are paid very well to manage the city’s finances haven’t got a clue what they’re doing.

At yesterday’s finance committee meeting, Marietta Fire Department Chief Ted Baker stated, as has been widely reported, that the MFD budget for 2006 was cut by $300,000 and he is therefore worried about having enough money for the year. However, the city ‘auditor’ and the safety-service director both protested that the budget was not cut by $300,000. But when asked, neither of those people, who are the only two people who wrote the budget, could not say how much the cut was. That really happened and for proof, read this WMOA story about it.

In the story, we also find a rare statement of truth from the ‘auditor’: "Adams said the cuts were not random." Even yours truly agrees with that. You, gentle reader, can bet your favorite alligator pumps the cuts weren’t random. They were crafted very deliberately. The MFD budget was decimated not at random by Adams, but with some glee (this being that area of Adams’s personal motivations that are too vile to repeat). The municipal court budget was also slashed. That certainly wasn’t random. Those cuts were very precise, coming as they did only weeks after Adams’s chum Milt Nuzum was tossed out of office. The cuts didn’t happen when the court’s caseload plummeted. The cuts didn’t happen when Nuzum (to quote him) brought in "over a million dollars" of grant money. No, the cuts happened, that is to say were approved by Council, on the very same day the new judge took office. So for once, Adams told the truth, though it’s more of a confession than she intended. The budget cuts weren’t random. Keep that in mind.

The WMOA story also mentions the fact that the health department was forced to justify its existence before the finance committee yesterday. The story leaves out an interesting tidbit though. Dr. Brockett, who is the head of the city health department, admitted that he did not know about the $44,000 cut to his budget until AFTER it was passed by city council. Why this was left out of the story is unclear because it speaks volumes as to how out of control this whole process is. The current working theory of the beloved and respected city Council is that the city ‘auditor’ and assistant safety-service director are qualified, impartial, diligent and trustworthy enough to decide how to make deep cuts into the budgets of the health department, the MFD, and the Marietta PD, to name just a few. Then somewhere along the line, someone also decided that the best way to handle the cuts was just to write them without input, pass them on the first day of the year and let the department heads figure it out for themselves.

The Times did try to report on the meeting yesterday, and it was brave of them to try. But instead of focusing on the fact that no one in city government seems to know what is in or out of the MFD 2006 budget, the Times wrote about a plan to raise fire inspection fees that might generate a whopping $11,000 for the department. The paper made no mention of any suggestion on how to make up the other 96 percent of the cuts inflicted by Adams and the ASS director.

There is a nugget of gold in the Times story though, just to be fair. Let’s take a look at it: "Sandra Hickey, health department registrar, said the health department is short about $5,100 in its salaries and wages line item, and yet the department hasn’t had any cuts in employment. The department also received a $29,000 cut in its benefits line item. The cut was based on the hope that the city could negotiate a new health insurance package with its employees, said Mike Scales, assistant safety service director." So let’s get this straight- not only did the budget contain a presumed ‘salary freeze’ but it also contains at least one presumed cut in health benefits? Wow. Yours humble narrator hopes that the members of Council are proud of their first piece of legislation, the 2006 budget. Not only is it based on lies but it’s probably illegal and even more probably going to make a few union lawyers smile with righteous bloodlust. And take further note here- those cuts were done without the health department knowing anything about it until AFTER the budget was ‘law’.

But don’t tell old Head Wound Harry Vukovic (sorry- the tone has changed here a bit, but ‘Head Wound Harry’ is so right) that he bares some responsibility for any of this. Nope, according to Head Wound, who’s still learning the budget process in what has to be at least his fifth year on the finance committee, the responsibility for fixing this mess is with ‘the administration’. For some reason, Head Wound thinks that the Mayor should fix the $44,000 non-random cut to the health department enacted into law by city council. What’s especially precious about Head Wound’s stance is that he is again asking to be led by the Mayor. Here’s the quote: "‘I think what I’m concerned about is you’re looking at a budget that is $44,182 less and the question is how are we going to resolve that,’ Vukovic said. ‘That’s up to the administration to come up with an answer for us.’" What yours truly is concerned about is that this jackass is in charge of city finances. If one were to look at those two sentences and try to figure out what he’s really saying, you’ll find that his aim is to wiggle out of all responsibility for the budget being law and all responsibility for fixing it. Don’t forget that when news of the budget ‘crisis’ broke, literally the minute Council passed the 2006 budget, Head Wound promised that he would take action to set things right, or as right as all his astounding gifts could make possible. Since then, all Head Wound has done is hold meetings where no one seems to know how much money the city has in any account. In those meetings, Head Wound’s answers for solving the ‘crisis’ amount to "raise fees", "find more places to cut" or "this is the administration’s problem". With such gifts of wisdom and poetry, yours truly would not be surprised to learn Vukovic’s middle name is Solomon.

His problem, and the problem with the rest of the intellectual giants on council is that they are allowing themselves to be led by a lawless and inept ‘auditor’ and a worm of an ASS director who believes it's okay to slip salary and benefit cuts into city budgets without telling anyone first. Want more proof that Adams and Scales are utterly worthless? Try this passage from the Times: "Elliott said the department already received a scare this year when a piece of equipment failed. Fortunately, he said the department has a decent sized carryover it can tap into in case of an emergency. That figure was not available Monday night." The amount of the water department’s carryover wasn’t available at a finance committee meeting about the budget. Oh well, it’s not like the city elects and pays someone $50,000 a year to know that sort of thing. You know, like an auditor.

Last and least is today’s Times story about the Armory. It appeared only one day after these words appeared in this space: "Surely members of CAPS cannot be pleased about the ‘progress’ that’s been made on the Armory." The title of today’s Times story? Answer: "Gift boosts armory supporters". This marks the 3,427th occasion the Times has printed a story because of yours truly. On the other hand, it also gives Mullen another chance to make some more promises about the Armory, just what we need.

The details of the story itself are rather piteous. Take this for instance: "The first major organized project, the roof, is expected to be completed before next winter. The price tag is estimated at $250,000 ‘roughly,’ according to McCarthy." Nowhere in the story does it mention that every penny of the half-million dollar Gutberlet gift is already locked away until January of 2007, somewhat after next winter will begin.

But have no fear- Mayor Squishy is here. Here with news that the long awaited Armory business plan is still months away from completion or more likely mutilation. Nevertheless, it’s reported that Mullen’s widely renowned powers with the written word will enable the city to "double the gift with a grant." Trouble is, if Mullen wasn’t such a hopeless loser with the city’s finances, the gift would already be double what it is now because Council would not have flushed half of it down the general fund. Speaking of flushing, why wasn’t councilman Sam Gwinn mentioned in the Times story? He is the chair of the lands and parks committee of council and presumably has been told by someone to have an opinion on the matter and what that opinion is.

To sum up yesterday’s developments: no one attending finance committee meetings is able to provide information on the amount of budget cuts or account balance information; the Mayor’s chief budget officer (Scales) co-wrote a budget with the city ‘auditor’ (Adams) that presumes ‘salary freezes’ and cuts to health benefits; and finally that Adams and Scales made those cuts, cuts to salaries, and other non-random cuts without informing some or all of the department heads before the budget became ‘law’.

Once again, here is the mantra because it’s going to take more than two or three people calling to make things change: Good luck, city workers. Moon and Adams and Solomon are out to cheat you. Demand their scalps. Better yet, contact the state auditor’s office to complain at 740-594-3300 and the state attorney general at 614-466-4320.

Mayor Squishy

2006-01-30T12:54:00.000-05:00

Wherein your humble narrator, as promised, though a bit delayed, here now presents a discussion of the Mayor and his ongoing role in contributing to the ruination of our once fair hamlet.

One of the most frequent questions posed to yours truly is essentially this: “Why is Mayor Mullen doing such a crappy job?” The only answer offered is: “He can’t help it.” Even if Mullen doesn’t want to ruin town, even if he really doesn’t want to lay off city employees, even if he really doesn’t want to drive businesses from town, he won’t be able to help himself. Granted, there seems to be some evidence that Mullen actually does want to lay off employees and so on, but we’ll deal with those charges in a bit. First, let’s review why Mullen is so helpless.

Mullen has no political capital. This may sound a bit esoteric for small-town politics, but the reality applies. Mullen was voted into office based on a few key things: bolstering first responders, attracting business, and not being Joe Matthews. Mullen went so far in his promises to and about the firefighters that he won the endorsement of their union against former firefighter and then-Mayor Matthews. Granted, there was no love lost between the MFD and Matthews even before Mullen ran for mayor. (The reasons for that split that have been repeated to yours truly are so absurd on Matthew’s part that they are difficult to believe so are thus likely true.) Still, Mullen did say all the right things like: the city needs more firefighters (it does), people want more firefighters (they do), and the MFD deserves the support of city government (of course). So why Mullen has gone so far in the opposite direction is a true mystery. But it’s certainly worth noting that the MFD and those of us in the Citizenry (apparently by Mullen and Adams standards) foolish enough to support the MFD are not the only constituents Mullen has abandoned since being elected. Surely members of CAPS cannot be pleased about the ‘progress’ that’s been made on the Armory. Yes, the building just got half a million dollars, free and clear, to be spent however best. But that money is already locked away until 2007 while the Armory roof keeps on leaking. How about the other committees and panels and groups and whatnot Mullen formed long enough for a story in the Times then forgotten as quickly? He hasn’t attracted any businesses to town (downtown is thriving despite local government not because of it) and instead has seen some of them driven away by government. Finally, it’s the easiest thing in the world, thankfully, not to be Joe Matthews. But voters really meant they wanted a Mayor that gets things done. Other than building the $6 million cement pond, Matthews didn’t do a thing. Other than letting Adams, Fordham and Vukovic manipulate the city’s finances Mullen hasn’t done a thing. Guess which one voters would prefer in hindsight?

Since Mullen has not been able to deliver on any of the key concerns expressed by those who elected him, he can’t get anything done. No one is willing to stand up and fight for or beside Mullen because they can’t know when he will buckle and abandon the fight, leaving them alone. Such is the cost of having squandered one’s political capital. No one trusts what Mullen says. No one knows what will come out of his mouth next time it opens. No one knows what he wants to do. No one knows what he wants for Marietta. And no one knows why he’s turned against those who put him in office. But the real problem for Mullen is that fewer and fewer care while more and more just want him gone from office.

Frankly, dear readers, yours truly wishes there was more to this than there is. But the fact is Mullen isn’t in any way cut out for the job and will do anything, desert anyone, and unhesitatingly debase himself if he thinks it will save his own hide for one more day. That’s assuming he’s capable of thinking that far into the future. Yours truly suspects that it’s much worse though. Mullen may actually only live minute-to-minute, rather like a lizard or some other lower life form, reacting without thought, at all, ever.

Mullen isn’t evil and isn’t smart enough to be devious. He’s just someone that shouldn’t be Mayor and can’t be trusted.

(PS Yes, yours truly is aware that the Times updated its site early this morning, including today’s ‘edition’ of the paper. Whether or not they’ve changed their policy back or whether the Times is just winging it every day is nearly impossible to know and almost completely beside the point since they have nothing to add to the civic discourse anyway. Still, yours truly will miss the fearless editorial genius responsible for this: “Our Opinion: Heart Fair is designed to promote better health”)

Helter Skelter

2006-01-27T18:48:00.000-05:00

(A note was added to this post Saturday morning. See the end of the section on the Times for details. -Ed.)

The news is falling fast and furious these days, making this post a bit long so consider yourself warned. Even as your humble narrator prepares this philippic, new news is coming across the wire and it’s damning for the Mullen administration. More about it at the end though, since most of this was written already.

At yesterday’s finance committee meeting, a new revelation came forth that provides another specific example of how city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams has been able to convince so many people that the city has no money when in fact, it’s sitting on a rather tidy pile of it. Also at yesterday’s meeting came proof in another specific example of how city money gets tucked money away so that it never gets used for its intended purpose; and furthermore this example is none other than the Gutberlet gift. Finally, yours truly will also provide stunning and otherwise unbelievable proof that the city’s ‘newspaper’ is nothing more now than a tawdry joke, not to be taken seriously by those of us who still care what happens in our once fair town.

Most of the proof yours truly is about to present comes from the WMOA web site today. That’s not because the Times site has not yet updated at the time of posting, but because the Times doesn’t have any real news in it. There is a lot of propaganda in it, and we’ll discuss it later.

Adams Sneaky Trick Number One

One key way Sharon Adams manipulates the city’s books resembles the old game with a ball, three overturned bowls and lots of shuffling. Here’s the most relevant quote from the WMOA story about yesterday’s finance committee meeting: "Council members went into the finance committee meeting prepared to slash $134,000 worth of projects from the ‘over-appropriated’ Community Development Block Grant budget. However, upon the discovery that $96,000 was left unappropriated, council decided to continue the conversation in a meeting on Monday at 5:00." For longtime readers of this space, that story may sound very familiar. That’s because city ‘auditor’ tried this very same trick last year.

Behold this passage from this space, dated December 30, 2004: "THE ABOMINABLE AUDITOR SHARON ADAMS HAS REVISED HER FIGURES FOR ONE CITY ACCOUNT BY NEARLY $100,000 IN LESS THAN A MONTH. In a committee meeting in early December, AAS Adams claimed that the budget now in such hot dispute [the Community Development Block Grant] would have a carryover of less than $200,000. In today's Daily Disgrace, we find she now claims there will be nearly $290,000 in carryover in that account. Even with her questionable arithmetic skills, she should realize that SHE MADE AN ERROR OF NEARLY $100,000." If you guessed that the account Adams had shorted in 2004 was the same one she was shorting until yesterday, you’d be right.

Make sure we’re clear here. During the process of writing the 2005 city budget, the city ‘auditor’ provided incorrect information about the available money for the city’s Block Grant budget. In fact, at the time, Adams was claiming the account had some $100,000 less than was actually there. Then when writing the 2006 budget, and up until just yesterday, Adams had been providing incorrect information about how much money was available, claiming the same Block Grant account had about $96,000 less than it really did.

Let’s take another look at the first part of that quote from the WMOA story again: "Council members went into the finance committee meeting prepared to slash $134,000 worth of projects from the ‘over-appropriated’ Community Development Block Grant budget." In other words, if someone hadn’t discovered the $96,000 ‘error’ by the ‘auditor’, the members of the Coven were going to completely deny funding for local cable access television and street lighting, among other projects and perhaps cutting staff. (Someone saved the city the trouble of that last one. See the end of this post for details. –Ed.) Last year at this time, the members of the Coven were deciding whether or not to provide funding for the Armory, the Colony and merchants’ groups. Last year, the chair of the finance committee, Art Fordham, claimed that those worthy projects could not be funded because there wasn’t enough money in the Block Grant budget. When the $100,000 ‘error’ was discovered Fordham convinced the Coven to tuck all the money away into an emergency repair account to be used by Citizens after the floods. The money mostly went unspent because the Coven created a joke of a program that no one wanted to participate in.

(Also, the ‘error’ was discovered in 2004 by the member of the Mullen administration who is now reporting for WMOA and who was obviously at the meeting yesterday and so was probably actually the one to ‘find’ the ‘error’ this year just like she did then. Said another way: no city employee or official can be credited for finding the $96,000 ‘error’ this year.)

The important point to remember is that when the Coven is passing the budget and enacting all these cuts to city departments, they are doing so based on false information being provided to them by the city ‘auditor’ Sharon Adams. There are now two documented instances where Adams deliberately (or because of stupidity, if she would prefer) provided incorrect information that would have otherwise lead to cuts in city services if her lies had not been forcibly brought to light. Note the word ‘forcibly’ there because it’s important. It took someone with true knowledge of the money situation repeating over and over last year the fact that Adams was shorting the account before Adams and Fordham would admit that they were wrong. Now come to this year. Adams tried the VERY SAME TRICK and almost got away with compelling the development department to cut back until her lie was exposed once again. Remember- the Coven was going to make the cuts until the meeting started yesterday.

No one should be under the illusion that the Block Grant budget was the only one Adams scams in that way. In today’s issue of the Times, there is a story about how the police department is cutting back on car patrols and overtime (which amounted to less than four percent of all payroll costs for the department last year) and another story about how the fire department is concerned about having enough money to make it through this year. All the while they are also being asked to take pay freezes and pay cuts if not cuts to personnel. The most outrageous and despicable part of this is that these cuts are based on lies by the city ‘auditor’. If she can nearly pull off shorting one account $100,000 two years in a row, can anyone believe she has not done so with other accounts? It’s plain that but for one person, the Block Grant would have been needlessly cut two years in a row. What’s the guarantee other departments have similar people who are such effective stewards?

Actually, we know there aren’t any left in the Mullen administration. His chief budgetary officer, the assistant safety-service (gentle readers will have to put up with ASS) director has now shamed himself and Mullen by allowing the Coven to pass a budget "with the expectation that a salary freeze would eventually be in place" this year. Those are the words of Sharon Adams, the ASS director’s budget co-author. So the Mullen administration assumed a ‘salary freeze’ would be in place as did the city ‘auditor’. If the ASS director were truly worthy of the responsibility of writing the city budget, one would expect him to catch little things like $96,000 errors. Instead, the ASS director and therefore the Mayor simply go along with what Adams tells them.

So- Adams is now on record as twice providing erroneous information to the Coven that would have resulted in cutbacks in services and projects, and Council is twice on record as being prepared to accept the false information and make those cutbacks until the very same error was twice detected and the Council was convinced of its truth at the very last moment. That is one way Adams is able to cause huge problems with the city’s finances, but it’s not the only way.

Adams Sneaky Trick Number Two

The other trick Adams has long employed is drastically underestimating city revenues. This is another way of convincing the Council and Mayor that the city has less money than it does. When writing a budget, one must first know how much money is on hand and how much will be coming in during the life of the budget. We’ve already seen how Adams manipulates the first part, by convincing easily confused elected officials that the city has less money than it really does.

Adams also drastically underestimates how much money will be coming in during the duration of the budget. Witness this quote from that same WMOA story mentioned above: "In yesterday afternoon’s Marietta City Council finance committee meeting, City Treasurer Valerie Holley provided an update on income tax revenues for January, saying she believes the city will collect as much as $80,000 more than anticipated." In other words, the city is taking in a good deal more than was anticipated in the budget. This is not the first time this has happened.

More than once yours truly has brought up a story in the Times from November 2003 that was all about how the city was receiving a heck of a lot more in inheritance tax than had been budgeted for. Here’s an excerpt from the story: "Marietta received an unexpected $561,030 from inheritance taxes this past Monday, an amount much greater than city officials planned. The check brings the total amount of 2003's inheritance money to $718,368.85, much more than the $350,000 City Auditor Sharon Adams anticipated in the annual budget." Notice a pattern yet? Adams habitually underestimates how much money the city will be taking in every year.

‘But Professor,’ some may say, ‘even if she did underestimate what would be coming in, surely our beloved city Council has been providing oversight and tracking how the budget forecasts match up with the actual day to day figures.’ True, one would presume that Council, with all of that highly praised ‘institutional memory’ would know that just writing a budget is not the end of the process. In other words, to keep a true accounting of the money, one absolutely must check the plan against the reality. However, we know from the 2004 state audit report management letter that Council did not take this crucial step. Here is a passage from the 2004 audit report ‘Recommendation’ number three: "The Finance Committee did not review budget vs. actual information from the current year at their meetings. This may lead to the Finance Committee being unaware of significant fluctuations between actual amounts received/expended and amounts originally budgeted, which may need to be brought back to their attention so further action may be taken." The meaning is clear: when Adams dramatically underestimates city revenues, no one knows because Council never bothers to check this very basic and highly crucial information.

In the past, Adams could thank the former head of the finance committee Art Fordham for letting her get away with this trick. Now she can just thank whatever underlord of stupidity is responsible for the likes of Vukovic, Burnworth and Bertram. Since they have no clue about what they are supposed to be doing, including and especially the ‘businesspersons’ on Council, Adams is still getting away with underestimating how much money the city will actually have on hand, thereby leading to cuts in services.

Sneaky Trick Number Three

This news tidbit is so disgusting it’s nearly beyond words. It’s shameful and displays an utter disregard for common sense and decency. Tucked into the middle of the same WMOA story (anyone still miss the Times?) came this: "Also, in yesterday’s meeting, [city treasurer] Holley said that on January 19 she purchased a one year certificate of deposit to harbor the Armory Trust Fund. The $533,743 will earn 4.65 percent interest at Wesbanco." The question is of course, when was it decided that there would be no work done on the Armory this year? Now that half of the Gutberlet gift is sunk into a CD for a year, none of that money can go to fix the roof or be used for anything else at all.

This shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise. Sinking money into CD’s has long been the investment of choice for the city’s financial wizards. Never mind that the money is completely inaccessible for use even during a crisis (say the General Fund being overdrawn) and that there are other safe ‘products’ that not only yield higher returns, they also don’t lock the money away. Even if Adams and the treasurer are scared of real investing, one can purchase CD’s for only thirty days. True, the yield wouldn’t be a breathtaking 4.65 percent, but at least the money would be available at the beginning of every month for emergencies.

Obviously, yours truly is not suggesting that Council spend the Gutberlet gift of fixing the budget ‘crisis’. The real point is that there are huge amounts of money ‘invested’ in such a way that it cannot be used, even in times of ‘crisis’. Why then have the money at all? If the city’s money were being managed by professionals, it would not only be earning more interest, it would be invested in such a way as to make at least some of it available at least on a month’s notice should it be needed.

(Another note here about the Armory CD. Anyone else notice that the money was taken out of the ‘Armory Trust Fund’ before it was created by city Council? The story said "January 19 [Holley] purchased a one year certificate of deposit to harbor the Armory Trust Fund." The fund was not actually created until the evening of the 19th at the regular city council meeting. To put it plainer, that evening as the members of the Council and Mayor Doodle were babbling on about being safe and careful with the cash and using it to repair the Armory, the money was already locked up for a year. Way to go, everyone. What legal authority did Holley have to take the money directly out of the General Fund, where it was on the 19th, and buy a CD? Does the city’s alleged ‘law director’ and executor of the Gutberlet estate believe such shenanigans are proper?)

Recap of Adams’s Tricks

So- today in one story, we have three prime examples of how the city ‘auditor’ distorts the picture of city finances and by doing so, inflicts cuts and anxiety that would not be necessary if a truly qualified person were the auditor. First thing she does is lie about how much money is actually on hand. Second, she lies about how much money the city is taking in, shorting the city every time. Third, she ties up every penny she can get her hands on, making it unavailable in times of need. In these scams she is assisted by the stupidity of Council, the Mayor and other city officials. Adams does this stuff at least partially intentionally (the other part being idiocy) as a way to make Mayor Mullen look like a jackass as well as jabbing her bony fingers in the eyes of the Marietta Fire Department (for reasons too unholy to mention even here) at the same time. She doesn’t give a rat’s bippy if the city crashes. It will be blamed on Mullen and/or Council. You can be certain the Times won’t blame her.

The Latest Disgraces of the Times

In today’s paper there was absolutely no mention of Adams’s $96,000 Block Grant ‘error’, no mention about Adams’s income tax estimates being so wildly off and no mention of the ‘Armory Trust Fund’ CD scam. Since the first two items amount to the city having about $176,000 more than was thought yesterday morning, one might think the Times might consider that newsworthy. Instead, they ran three budget stories that unquestioningly perpetuate the Adams myth that the city has no money and therefore cops should just get used to walking and not working overtime. As for the MFD, everyone knows they don’t do anything anyway and it’s not like Council just passed a law to get more revenue for the department based on the amount of work they do (more EMS runs, more money; fewer EMS runs, less money).

But instead of asking salient questions about the six citations and recommendations in the 2004 state audit report directly relating to the general fund, or the others that involve separate instances of financial mismanagement, the Times once again has swallowed what known lawbreaker Sharon Adams told them. By doing so, the paper continues to play its own shameful part in enabling Adams to break the law and cheat the city.

Thankfully though, the paper did run a front-page story about anti-smoking efforts in California. If there’s one thing yours truly hears over and over, it’s Citizens asking for more California anti-smoking news in the Marietta Times. It must be another one of their winning strategies to increase circulation.

That must also be why the paper ran an ‘editorial’ cartoon directly comparing the President to Usama bin Laden. Well, it was either supposed to be bin Laden or just some random bearded person in a turban. But if it were just a random bearded person in a turban, that might be considered racial profiling, and we all know the Times is far too urbane for that sort of thing.

NOTE ADDED SATURDAY MORNING: As of 7:30 this morning, the Times web site has not yet updated since Thursday afternoon. The 'contents' of the Friday edition, such as they were, have been discussed and dismissed already in this space. Yours truly can also report that there is exactly one story of any local interest in the Saturday edition, and that one is about the resignation from the development department, as mentioned directly below, since the story actually broke Friday. As a public service, yours truly now provides a link to the lone Times news story of the day. True, the Times site has not updated, but the story appears on the Parkersburg News site anyway. If you want to read it for free, simply click right here. There aren't even any good letters in the paper today. Funny thing is the Times 'e-poll' is still being updated early every day on the site. Yours truly is starting to believe those rumors about the Times having money problems. Look for a subscription-based web site soon from the Times.

The Late News of the Day

If you’ve not heard yet, it seems that not only does Mayor Mullen completely believe that the budget ‘crisis’ is real, he’s prepared to eliminate the city development director position because of it. Late today WMOA reported that the current development director, Tom Kunz, is fleeing the sinking ship Mullen and he won’t be replaced. Here’s a quote: "Mullen said he would not immediately replace Kunz, considering the city’s budget crisis. Instead, Mullen hopes to fix the general fund and look at reorganizing city departments in a more comprehensive way." So- Mullen is going to give up on any pretense of community development in order to pretend that the budget crisis is real. Why a ‘Democrat’ would go to so much trouble to stiff the city workers’ unions is beyond yours truly. He should be especially ashamed of his conduct and lack of courage when it comes to the MFD. They did after all endorse his mayoral candidature and just see how the little twerp is repaying them. Mullen should stand up to Adams and Vukovic and make them… Sorry, your humble narrator had to stop because that sentence was getting too fantastical. Mullen couldn’t make a baby burp, let alone make Council and the ‘auditor’ take him seriously. More about the painful and ongoing shortcomings of Mullen this weekend.

Now the mantra of this space for the foreseeable future: Good luck, city workers. Moon and Adams are out to cheat you. Demand their scalps. Better yet, contact the state auditor’s office to complain at 740-594-3300 and the state attorney general at 614-466-4320.

¡FIVE ALARM CITY EMPLOYEE ALERT!

2006-01-26T12:05:00.001-05:00

For all those city employees who attended yesterday’s employee relations meeting: every one of you should attend today’s finance committee meeting at 5 pm because you’ve all been lied to once again.

Here’s the proof: in today’s Daily Dog Trainer, the story about yesterday’s meeting begins: Mayor Milquetoast "said it’s his plan to ask the city’s three unions to forgo pay increase this year…" Then a few paragraphs down one reads that the city’s Abominable ‘Auditor’ Sharon Adams "said departments’ salary accounts were cut in this year’s budget with the expectation that a salary freeze would eventually be in place." It’s been repeatedly stated in public that the city’s assistant safety-service director co-authored the budget with AAS Adams, therefore the Mayor was counting on a pay freeze well before asking for one. Either the assistant safety-service director knew the pay freeze was built in or he didn’t. Neither option removes blame from Mullen.

Mullen chooses to dig his grave a bit deeper though. In today’s story he talks on and on about how he knows that the city can’t unilaterally institute a pay freeze on union employees without mentioning that his chief budget officer did just that in cooperation with AAS Adams. There’s been a lot of grumbling in the rumor mills about the various employee unions formally alleging that the city is not bargaining in ‘good faith’ and today’s story seems to offer deadly proof of it. For those who may not know: Co-authoring a budget that anticipates a pay freeze that hasn’t even been requested yet is not an example of ‘good faith’ bargaining.

Meanwhile, AAS Adams continues to hold the city hostage by falsely claiming that the city has no money. (Notice that the Dog Trainer hasn’t bothered to follow up on the ‘no money for payroll’ scam they ran last week. Did AAS Adams blow the Gutberlet gift on payroll or not? Does the Dog Trainer not remember this question?) Once again- the city has plenty of money on hand well beyond the Gutberlet gift. The deep cuts being inflicted on the departments are based on false assumptions, outright lies, plain old bad bookkeeping and stupidity. The chair of Council’s finance committee has admitted that he does not understand the budget process even though he’s been on the committee for years. The state auditor’s office has for at least half a decade been warning the city that the auditor has no regard for the law and/or common sense when she manages the city’s money. The hapless Mayor and his dazzling staff either have no idea how to stop AAS Adams or they enjoy being her punching bag.

Therefore, city workers, go to today’s finance committee meeting and demand that they hold AAS Adams accountable and demand to know why council has been depriving the general fund of thousands upon thousands of dollars. (See the discussions about the 2004 state audit report from earlier this month for more on this. –Ed.) City council and the abominable ‘auditor’ are scamming city workers and it can only be stopped in the finance committee.

Good luck, city workers. Moon and Adams are out to cheat you. Demand their scalps. Better yet, contact the state auditor’s office to complain at 740-594-3300 and the state attorney general at 614-466-4320. Suggested complaints might include the city ‘auditor’ admitting that she’s unable to comply with the recommendations and citations in the state audit reports and management letter. Another complaint might be that AAS Adams and a member of Mayor Milquetoast’s staff chose to attempt a unilateral a pay freeze during the midst of union contract negotiations. One might also complain that the ‘auditor’ publicly blamed the budget ‘crisis’ on a decline of cigarette tax revenue while at the same time budgeting for an increase (up to a whopping $800) in cigarette tax revenue. Mind you, this is by no means a complete list, but it’s a start.

Riding the Land Train into Oblivion

2006-01-26T08:13:00.000-05:00

Last night was spent in deep restful slumber, thanks to knowledge that the county’s port authority did not hire former FEMA director Mike Brown, Kofi Annan, Usama bin Laden, Kim Jong Il, or Satan for its director. Everyone in the county knows that the authority tried to refrain from naming candidates in the ‘legitimate media’ because the original intent of the board was to hire an inept or evil person. Thankfully, the Daily Disappointment stepped in and worked their usual magic. Only then, gentle readers, did the port authority board relent from its despotic dimwit director idea.

Funny thing is of course, after all their hullabaloo, the Daily Disappointment was only about the third media outlet in the valley to have the story by the time the paper hit the street. Also, it has been noted that the Daily Disappointment’s website is not updating until afternoon. This amounts to rumor number 647 about how the Disappointment is very close to finally collapsing due to lack of sales. The theory is that the paper is not updating the site early in order to drive up sales of the print edition; the thought being that the average Citizen just cannot wait those two or three extra hours to get their second-rate myopic news for free and will thus rush out to spend fiddy-cent on a copy of the actual rag. Evidently the ‘business’ persons in charge at the Disappointment are as stupid as the editorial staff. Here’s hoping the scourge of the Times is about to become a thing of the past. (Yes, no paper would be better than this one, which constantly and knowingly spreads lies and disinformation. No, your humble narrator doesn’t believe the Times site is updating later to spare itself from ‘MariettaWatch’.)

Speaeking of living up to lowered expectations, the Coven seems poised to do so again with the ‘land train’. (An aside- what poet came up with ‘land train’? Is that to make it clear we’re not discussing a ‘water train’ or ‘peace train’?) Anyway, it’s clear from comments in the Daily Disappointment that the Coven wants to doom the ‘land train’.

It should first be noted that not a little of what was in yesterdays Disappointment was actually a rehash of some comments made at last week’s regular Coven meeting. (See this WMOA story from last week. [For another example of the Disappointment being very slow to pick up leftovers, compare this WMOA sewer story from two weeks ago and this Disappointment version of the same from yesterday.]) It was there that Trolley owner-operator Harley Noland first recommended that Council not support the ‘land train’ because it would hurt Harley. Harried Harley doesn’t want competition and moreover doesn’t believe Marietta needs it. After all, he claims that since trolley traffic is down, the ‘land train’ is not needed and should not be welcomed in town. Perhaps Noland failed to consider the possibility that trolley traffic is down because the trolley sucks.

Whatever Communist ideals drive Harley Noland, the problem for him and the Coven is that the operators of the ‘land train’ don’t need Council’s permission for much. It is the state of Ohio that will determine the roadworthiness of the ‘land train’ itself and it’s the state that will grant the operators a business license. One might think that a ‘lawyer’ of Randall Burnworth’s sterling reputation and searing intellect would know those basic legal facts.

Rather, Burnworth chose to boast about his mental capacity while showing off his mastery of the language: "I can’t hardly imagine taking anything longer than my truck across Montgomery, Scammel or Wooster, going up and down," opined Burnworth. If Burnworth can’t image it, dear readers, we know it must be beyond all comprehension. On the other hand, here’s what the operator said about the train’s incomprehensible size: "The train can go wherever you can put a pickup truck," and "the train would require four parking spots on a city street." If the operators had brought crayons and drawn Burnworth a picture, or at least let him play with the crayons, perhaps he would have shut up and stopped embarrassing himself and the city.

The operators of the proposed ‘land train’, being already well established in town and previously blissfully unaware of Burnworth’s crippling intellect, thought they might get a bit of assistance from the Coven to help expand. (Note that in the Disappointment’s story, there’s absolutely no mention of what the Coven is actually considering in this matter and yours truly is going to let the 'newspaper' figure it out on their own for once.) The Coven, true to its history, has decided that instead of fostering development, it will actively discourage another business expansion in Marietta. Remember last year when the Coven decided not to support a new low-income private living facility for senior Citizens? Yes we can be thankful that the Coven spared us all the nuisance of seeing elderly people live in a cheap clean new space. Because when the Coven chose to not support the project (after originally supporting it), the developer decided not to build, even though he didn’t need the Coven’s approval to do so. (The developer was only asking for a statement of support on behalf of the city so he could apply for grants due to the fact that he was intending to provide low-cost housing to seniors, which some non-Marietta government entities think is a good thing.)

Passing a budget with a built-in million-dollar deficit and actively discouraging business expansion in town. It’s been a great January so far for our new Coven of Cowards.

This Week in Doomsville

2006-01-21T09:24:00.000-05:00

The forces hell-bent on destroying Marietta for the sake of personal agendas have been hard at work this week. The identity of those forces is of course no surprise by now. The members of city Council were quite busy this week doing nothing at all to fix the voluminous problems caused by mismanagement of city finances. The city’s auditor is still running around town trying to falsely convince people that the city has no money. Last and least, the city’s ‘newspaper’ has launched its latest obsession that no one other than Dog Trainer editrix BA Houtman cares about and has caused damaged because of it.

Let’s work in reverse order. On Thursday, the Dog Trainer exploited a loophole in the state’s ‘open records’ law to eliminate two finalists for the head of the county’s port authority. Weeks ago, WMOA ran a story that the county had narrowed the search down to four candidates. The WMOA story didn’t mention any names. In her zeal to make the most of leftovers, BA Houtman decided it was more important to expose the names of the candidates than it was to let the county conduct its search with a modicum of decorum. Understandably, two presumably qualified persons withdrew from consideration rather than see their names in the paper. As far as yours truly can tell, the only persons who perhaps cared to know the actual names of the candidates were the other candidates. And of course BA Houtman. (Today’s editorial wherein BA sneaks up on libel again by falsely tying the CIC to the port authority and dragging her other obsession, Sequelle, into the matter is a fascinating mix of hubris and bullshit.)

Next time you are strolling through downtown, ask a few random people if they care more about the identity of POSSIBLE county development officials or VERY REAL city budget problems. Yours truly can report that the Daily Dog Trainer worked on the county development story for at least a week. Meanwhile, the same rag chose to ignore real news. Take for example the story about the city’s budget "crisis" that ran on the same day as the development story.

Here’s a passage from the article: "On Wednesday, Engineer Joe Tucker became the first of many department heads to meet with City Council’s finance committee to discuss his department’s budget and offer ideas on increasing revenue and cutting expenses. Also on Wednesday, the city auditor met with council’s finance committee to review her budget." Some readers not familiar with the low standards of the Dog Trainer may have expected to read about what the auditor had to say to the budget committee. Readers who are familiar with the Dog Trainer’s ‘standards’ were not surprised to find that there is no further mention of the auditor or what she said in the rest of the of story at all.

Since the ‘auditor’ was the subject of pages and pages of citations and ‘recommendations’ from state auditors and since ‘auditor’ Adams has been widely credited and blamed for the current budgetary "shortfall" that threatens layoffs and cuts, one might reasonably presume that a ‘newspaper’ would report her latest comments to council’s finance committee. But instead of some real reportage, Mopey McIntosh and BA Houtman were apparently too busy preparing the ruinous county story that no one cared about other than BA Houtman herself.

At least one person cares about the lawless behavior of the city ‘auditor’ and Council. For the better part of an hour at Thursday’s regular Council meeting, the recent contents of this space were relayed directly to the Coven. The effect was rather like a riff on "The Madwoman of Chaillot" right up to the very end. The Citizen expressed scorn and alarm at the quintuple insults to the Marietta Fire Department (the deep cut to the MFD 2006 budget, the loss of the EMS fee revenues, the haphazard management of their pension fund, threatened layoffs and threatened contract concessions). She also expressed justifiable outrage at the lack of Council oversight that allows for an admitted lunatic to do whatever she pleases with piles of city money.

The Coven’s reaction to the Citizen’s outrage was notably muted, save for one interesting part. In responding to the question about the possible taxes from the Gutberlet estate, the city’s law director piped in to say there were none. However, he did not choose to confess that he is also the executor of the estate. Instead of revealing what some might minimally consider an interesting fact, the law director chose to make himself look silly in the pages of Friday’s Dog Trainer. Here’s the quote: "In this case, Riggs said the money is already in the general fund, so it’s not like the gift’s going anywhere." Apparently Riggs is a complete fool. There are pages and pages and pages of state audit reports that detail how the city auditor uses the general fund has a plaything, doling out or stashing money from the fund without any regard to the law, the city budget or common sense. Therefore, saying that because the Gutberlet gift is in the general fund then it must be safe is something only a complete fool would say. The city’s general fund is absolutely the worst place for the money to be.

Unfortunately, despite what you may have read in the Dog Trainer, that’s exactly where the million dollars will remain. That’s because the two new funds don’t yet exist. The state auditor’s office has to approve of the creation of them before they will really exist. Meantime, that pile of money is sitting on AAS Adams’s plate and she claims she won’t be able to make payroll in a few days. Only silly people believe that the Gutberlet money is safe from the schemes of inept and scurrilous public officials.

Prediction for the coming week: a special council meeting will be held to ‘deal’ with the city’s payroll. Finance committee chair Head Wound Harry Vukovic stated this possibility Thursday evening, after he was done chiding the Citizen that spoke out against the lawless behavior of council. Head Wound Harry told her in effect to attend committee meetings (you know, the ones he schedules in the afternoon so those with real jobs can’t attend) and to read the 2006 city budget as was printed in the back pages of the Daily Dog Trainer. Head Wound seems unaware that the document in question is utterly worthless. Maybe he should work for the Dog Trainer too.

Up in Smoke

2006-01-19T12:17:00.000-05:00

Before vivisecting the news of the day, your humble narrator has a couple of technical matters to mention. First, for those that haven’t yet noticed, most recent posts in this space have been left open for anonymous comments. The comments are "moderated" which means that before they actually appear online, they are placed in a sort of holding tank where yours truly may read them and then decide whether or not to post them. To date, no comment has been rejected. The only time comments will be rejected is when they mention the personal lives of anyone. The thought here is to prevent scurrilous and pointless rumors from appearing, as has happened on other, lesser websites devoted to Marietta news. Yours truly did allow one rumor-related comment to pass through because it does not involve anyone’s personal life. More about that in a bit.

The second technical point is for those less web-savvy readers out there. Always check underlined words for links to different websites. For example, yesterday’s concise though partial roll call of lies by the city ‘auditor’ is filled with such links. Every time the word "lies" appears, it is a link to a story either here or in the "legitimate media" detailing the lie being referenced.

If yours truly were to pick a link at random from today’s news, it might be this story (See?) from WMOA about the city’s cigarette tax revenue. Readers may recall the claims by ‘auditor’ Adams a couple of weeks ago that "recent drops in smoking, while good for the health of citizens, have hurt the amount of money coming into the city from cigarette taxes." Yours truly stated the belief that the city does not receive any direct money from cigarette taxes. It turns out that the former Moonie convert at WMOA went and asked the auditor’s office who was right and it turns out that neither of us were. Today’s story claims that the city gets a few hundred dollars a year and that the auditor herself has budgeted 125 percent more for this year than she did for last. So- Adams lied yet again. Not only is the city supposed to be getting more money from cigarette taxes, the amount received per year would not cover the auditor’s salary for one week.

Which brings us to the still-breaking story of the city’s budget "crisis". Yesterday’s Dog Trainer ran a story alleging that the city may not have enough money to make payroll. This is utter balderdash. The city has plenty of money on hand. Those who are claiming otherwise either don’t know better (i.e., members of the Mullen administration, newspaper reporters, some members of council) or do know better and are up to no good (the city ‘auditor’, some other members of council).

To prove the latest lies and scare tactics (more on that later) are just that, let’s take a look at the opening sentence of the Dog Trainer story about the payroll "crisis": "Marietta officials expressed concern Tuesday about meeting next week’s $200,000 payroll." Actually, there’s one and only one official quoted as having "concerns" and that person is none other than ‘auditor’ Adams.

Adams’s comments are certainly worth a look: "During a council audit committee meeting, City Auditor Sharon Adams said the city’s general fund is currently showing a $1.3 million balance. The concern, though, is that about $1 million of that balance is from the Emma Gutberlet bequest, leaving the general fund with a more realistic balance of about $56,881. ‘If I don’t hit (the $200,000 payroll) with monies coming in ... I’ll have to go next door (to the income tax office) for an advance,’ Adams said. Adams said she’s already asked for an advance from the income tax office for January, so she was reluctant to do so again already." As usual, it’s difficult to know where to start. First- it was only a few days ago that Citizens were mislead that "As of [a week ago], council agreed to set up two separate funds for the bequest. One fund will be for the armory money, while the other will eventually hold the unrestricted funds." Everyone should pay close attention to tonight’s council meeting (7:30 on Channel 15 or at Lookout Park. -Ed.) to see if they actually create the separate funds and actually move the money there. By law they are required to do so, but given the past malfeasance of Adams and sitting members of council in regard to such matters, they may not do it, thereby leaving all of the roughly $1.1 million Mrs. Gutberlet left to the city in the general fund. Second- also as usual, the math of the city ‘auditor’ doesn’t add up. Notice she claims that the general fund has $1.3 million in it, but take away the $1.1 million estate money and –poof- suddenly there’s less than $60,000 in the account. Only to the ‘auditor’ can believe such nonsense. Third- why in Hell has Adams "already asked for an advance from the income tax office for January"? No one seemed to be interested in following up on that crucial question.

Also no one seems to be aware of the rumor that was left on yesterday’s post, that the city’s law director was and presumably still is the executor of Emma Gutberlet’s estate. Those with knowledge of the situation are invited to verify or deny this to yours truly. Again- this rumor is only being allowed to stand because it involves official conduct. If it’s true, the conflict of interest is mind numbing. It may certainly explain why no one is complaining on behalf of the estate.

Speaking of Mrs. Gutberlet’s estate, let’s talk about estate taxes a moment. Those who reread some of the stories referenced in this space yesterday may have noticed that back in November of 2003, the city reported a "windfall" in inheritance taxes in the amount of $561,030. The budgeted amount for the year only totaled $350,000. However, it was never reported what the city did with the "windfall".

The timing of the story is interesting because November of 2003 was right around the time that city officials are now claiming that a "budget crunch" began. Then yours truly started pondering the estate of Mrs. Gutbertlet. We know that she left well over a million dollars to the city, but frankly we have no idea of the total size of her estate. One might reasonably conclude that to leave over a million dollars to the city, the estate must have been of a very respectable size indeed, which presumably lead to a sizable death tax bill. It’s a rather unseemly topic, but unfortunately that’s how far Adams has degraded the situation. If she were a true ‘auditor’ Marietta would not be in the position it is and no one would have to worry about the city ripping off a dead woman.

It boils down to this- Adams has juggled the books so long, even she doesn’t know which way is up. For years she’s been able to get away with various Ponzi schemes involving city money. These schemes amounted to either helping out political cronies in a variety of ways (the names Gulliver and Nuzum spring to mind) or to deny money to those she dislikes (Mayor Mullen, the Marietta Fire Department). But like most Ponzi schemes, it could only last for so long before everything starts collapsing. The key factors leading to the final ruination of Adams’s schemes include: the loss of her chief enabler and unindicted co-conspirator Art Fordham, the loss of Bill McFarland from the city to the county and his evidently diligent work there, actual drains on city books (the pool, the municipal court), and the mounting evidence in the state audits. Those who work for the city should absolutely not believe what elected officials are telling them. The money is there and Adams is responsible for the mess and lies that say otherwise.

City Liar Sharon Adams

2006-01-18T10:05:00.000-05:00

There’s a lot of babble still about the motives of your humble narrator. Most especially people want to know why yours truly has a “vendetta” against certain elected officials and the “legitimate media”. More about the media later but first a look into why this space spends so much time on the Abominable Auditor Sharon Adams.

The simple fact is AAS Adams is the single most dangerous and corrupt official in the city. She’s the most dangerous because she controls the money. Over the past year and a half evidence of her ineptitude and lackadaisical attitude towards managing Marietta’s money has been piling up.

Let’s go all the way back to the second post ever made here on MariettaWatch. Here’s a quote from the summer of 2004: “Why hasn’t anyone in the media asked Marietta auditor Sharon Adams how she is spending her time these days? For those not in the know (Hi, Jennifer Houtman!), she has demanded that all cash being generated from the new aquatic center be brought into her office instead of being taken directly to a bank. Once the money has arrived, it is literally spread out on her desk, whereupon Adams herself beings to laugh, make jokes about how much of it there is, etc., rather like a decrepit child in a candy store. Remember, before it arrives in her clutches, the money has already been counted, recorded and bundled at the aquatic center itself. Meanwhile, Adams' staff carries out the work she was elected and is being paid to do.” No doubt some readers thought that old PC was crazy for picking on Adams for such things. Then just a few weeks ago came the 2004 state audit report of the city. Lo and behold! There in “Recommendation” number fifteen we find this: “The lack of internal control procedures did not allow for proper supporting documentation to be maintained for revenue received and deposited by the City for the aquatic center [sic]. This could result in errors going undetected and increase the probability of theft and fraud to occur.” Professor Chaos was right, AAS Adams was wrong. And that was just the beginning of MariettaWatch.

By December of 2004, the situation regarding AAS Adams became very plain and some facts that have yet to be disputed were first reported here. The list of known offenses by AAS Adams just over a year ago read like this:

"-She claimed that overtime costs for city workers are out of control. (Actually, those costs for this calendar year are less than they were this time last year.)

-She ALONE decided to pay former city development director Mike Gulliver $10,000 in unemployment compensation this year.

-She admits to keeping slush funds of unspent and uncommitted money.

-She keeps the city books in antiquated paper form.

-She refuses to share basic information about city accounts with other elected officials.

-She insisted that all cash receipts from the aquatic center be brought to her office, even after they had been prepared for deposit.

-She has no more training in bookkeeping than she has fashion sense.

-She complained in a public meeting that elections are too much of a bother, because it means new people come into office.

-No one in Marietta- including the person who is paid to know- knows how much money the city has or does not have."

Every one of these charges is still true. Take for example the charge that AAS Adams does not know how much money the city has on hand. Back in December of 2004 it may have sounded a bit fanciful that the city ‘auditor’ didn’t know her job. Then read this passage from the 2004 state audit report: "For the General Fund, the City over estimated revenue for 2004 and significantly under estimated expenditures on their 2004 tax budget. The City did not carry forward the proper beginning balance for the General Fund in 2004 or accurately reflect encumbrances outstanding at year end. We recommend the City accurately prepare the tax budgets for the upcoming years." In other words, those who get paid to manage the city’s money, particularly the ‘auditor’, did not know how much money was in the General Fund. Professor Chaos was right; AAS Adams was wrong.

Then there are all the times that AAS Adams has lied to the public or other public officials. Here’s a partial list:

Adams lied that the Mullen administration was racking up huge cell phone bills.
Adams lied that the Mullen administration was racking up huge overtime costs.
Adams lied about the CDBG budget figures at the end of 2004.
Adams lied about the CDBG budget figures at the end of 2005.
Adams lied about the municipal court running an operating deficit.
Adams lied that she works well with other members of government.
Adams lied that the municipal court budget was not subject to change. (That fact changed the second Nuzum was kicked out of office.)
Adams lied that the citations in the 2003 state audit report were all to blame on the Moonies even though they had not taken office.
Adams lied that the citations in the 2003 state audit report were all to blame on bookkeeping methodologies.
Adams lied that the citations in the 2003 state audit report were all to blame on “changes in state regulations.”
Adams lied to state auditors about the city’s purchase orders.
Adams lied about the overdraft of the general fund last spring.
Adams lied about the city not paying bills late.
Adams lied about the "furnacegate" matter.
Adams lied some more about "furnacegate".
Adams kept on lying about "furnacegate."
Adams lied about the Aquatic Center.
Adams lied about the General Fund some more.
Adams lied about a 'drop' in cigarette tax money affecting the city.
Adams lied about a fictitious "miscellaneous fund".

And that list is nowhere complete for the past 18 months. So next time someone tells you old Professor Chaos has it "in" for AAS Adams, just remind that person of all the lies Adams has told to the public. As long as she is allowed to get away with such behavior, Marietta's finances will be in the hands of a lunatic.

The Fix is In

2006-01-14T14:08:00.000-05:00

Another day, another story in the Daily Dog Trainer that spreads lies and inaccuracies about the city's current financial meltdown. Don't misconstrue your humble narrator, the story makes for great reading, but only due to the sheer fun of Head Wound Harry Vukovic's admission of idiocy. Since he's apparently the last one in town to realize his imbecility, we'll save that morsel for later. First, let's deal with the size of the deficit the city is facing.

In Friday's Dog Trainer, a story referred to the city's "$2.1 million" shortfall. This was after repeatedly referring to the "$1.2 million" shortfall. So the question after yesterday was what is the accurate amount? Is the city suddenly short another million or did Mopey McIntosh just not bother reading his own story? Or did the 'editorial' staff of the paper just glide right past the numbers in the story? After all, numbers aren't especially important in budget stories. It must be with some relief then that today's story has the shortfall back down to "$1.2 million".

It may very well be the Friday figure was just a typo. However, it does accurately reflect the real shortfall. What the Dog Trainer has yet to figure out is that the city was actually short well over $2.1 million when the 2006 budget process began. The $1.2 million figure so often repeated is the figure the city is short AFTER significant cuts had been made to the fire department, municipal court and other areas of city government. Remember- when the 2006 budget was passed, various officials made much ado about all the work that had gone into preparing the budget. The "work" done by the city 'auditor' and the assistant safety-service director was making those cuts to the MFD and other departments. After making all those cuts, the city was still short $1.2 million. That's a key fact that the Dog Trainer has yet to figure out.

Another key fact the Dog Trainer staff should remember is that the sources they repeatedly use for stories on city finances are the very same people that the state auditor's office have cited time and time again for their poor management of city finances. Today's story, and one of yesterday's about the state audit, cited assistant safety-service director Scales when talking about the budget. Of course there is no mention in any of the stories that Scales himself is directly cited more than once in the 2004 state audit for his management failures and he is a prime suspect for mucking up the FEMA project books. Still, the Dog Trainer views him as an expert.

One actual expert not mentioned at all is the current county Auditor, Bill McFarland, who used to hold the assistant safety-service director position and prepared many city budgets, covering many of the ten years 'reviewed' in today's story. McFarland would have made a particularly interesting source since he also appears on the edges of the 2004 state audit report of the city. As he stated in the paper just a couple of weeks ago, the city and county are not communicating on financial matters and it's causing problems. The Dog Trainer didn't apparently think it was worth speaking to him though. Notice also that the asinine one, Art Fordham is not mentioned either, despite having received a state commendation for his financial wizardry in the city.

Today's story is all about one thing: how 'fixed costs' are completely to blame for the million-dollar shortfall, however much it really is. The funny thing about the term 'fixed costs' that apparently the 'reporter' in question didn't notice is the word 'fixed'. That's right- 'fixed costs' are 'fixed' which means that one knows they're coming. For example, are we to believe that no one in city government remembered that the city's unionized workers get "yearly 3.5 percent raises"? True, it is possible that the current gang of fools running Marietta may have forgotten, but it's not likely. To boil it down, those writing the city's budgets KNEW these increases were coming, years in advance.

Not content to blame the city's budget problems just on workers' contracts, today's story also tries again to foster the myth that "costs such as utilities" are rising "exponentially" and putting a pinch on the city. Happily, Bozo the reporter saw fit to include proof of the lies he was regurgitating. It turns out that over ten years, the utilities bill for the city has not quite doubled, from about $56,000 to $98,000. Where to begin with this one? First- doubling over a decade is not exactly growing "exponentially" and actually it's nowhere near growing exponentially. Second and a bit redundant- that's really not a huge increase when averaged out year-by-year. Third- are we to seriously believe the city is facing a million-dollar shortfall because of a $98,000 utility bill? For those who can't do the math (i.e., elected officials and reporters), that means the utilities make up about 8% of a $1.2 million shortfall.

So where did the rest come from? No one can really say. The city 'auditor' and the past chair of council's finance committee sure aren't saying, and mostly aren't even being asked. The current head of the committee now admits that he needs "to understand the budget process better" even though he's already been a member of the finance committee for years. Perhaps he should have taken the time "to understand the budget process better" when he began to have responsibility for that process years ago. What exactly did Asinine Art Fordham "teach" Vukovic in all those years, iambic pentameter? Anyway, your humble narrator sincerely hopes that council president Bertram now feels like a complete horse's ass, since the primary reason he cited for appointing Vukovic head of the finance committee was Head Wound's alleged understanding of the budget process.

Back to today's story, something else to notice is the complete lack of awareness about real drains on city finances that have otherwise been well publicized. The one that sticks out for yours truly is the pool. The city has to date spent roughly $6 million on the pool, and that spending started in earnest just before Mayor "Little Willie" Mullen took office. Yes, much of the money came from grants and federal sources, but a good chunk of the money spent was the city's. Don't forget- $500,000 of city money was spent on Pennsylvania Avenue alone. Municipal court is also not mentioned as a drain on city money. People seem more concerned that the new judge fired a bunch of partisan hacks than about the financial disaster those hacks have left in their wake.

Meantime, those still with jobs in the city have now been clearly warned and clearly lied to regarding what the immediate future holds for them. Just this past week, those employees were 'reassured' by council not to worry, but then those people read this in today's paper: "Other moves city officials are considering include layoffs, project delays, department reorganizations and restructuring employees' health care package [sic] as short- and long-term fixes to cut expenses." Again- you've all been warned. It really doesn't get much plainer than that.

There are other glaring errors in today's story but they are hopefully obvious to readers of this space by now. For example: "In 2004, expenses exceeded revenue by as much as $2.4 million," and "In 2004, these unencumbered funds totaled about $2.8 million." And let's not forget this passage: "Last year the [general] fund ran into a $24 deficit and hovered around depletion several other times, resulting in a spending freeze for all city departments." Every time Mopey tries to describe what happened to the general fund last year, he manages to find a new way to make it unclear; truly the hallmark of a great reporter. At least he didn't say the general fund "almost broke even". Lastly on the topic of Dog Trainer shortcomings, notice the paper has yet to report that the city's development budget is also short about $130,000. WMOA reported that fact last week, but the Dog Trainer seems blissfully unaware. But since they devotedly read this space, now they know.

An item left over from yesterday that some readers thought yours truly had missed is the city's credit card. As was noted last week in this space, the state auditors "recommended" that the city adopt a credit card use policy. Yesterday it was revealed that the only person with a city issued non-fuel credit card is the one person who has been repeatedly cited by state auditors for mismanaging city money; has admitted she does not know how to manage city money; and has admitted that she suffers from a low grade mental disorder that forces her to compulsively spend money on shoes to make herself feel better. The only evidence anyone should need that there is no oversight of city money is knowing that the city's lone credit card rests in the mentally unbalanced hands of the Abominable Auditor Sharon Adams. Wouldn't it be interesting to read that the city credit card had been used at Payless Shoes?

This Week in Marietta

2006-01-13T10:00:00.000-05:00

Here are all the things the Coven of Cowards is mucking up this week:

1. Today we learn that the Coven has plans to ignore Emma Gutbertlet’s will and dump all of her $1 million endowment into the city’s financial black hole. Yes council claims that they’re only ‘borrowing’ the money, not stealing it. If there’s anyone in town who believes the promises of any member of city government, those people are entitled to hold on to their dreams. Here in the real world though, we know the chance of the money being paid back is about the same chance that the EMS fees will ever benefit the fire department. The funniest part of the Daily Dog Trainer article on this shameful act was the part where Head Wound Harry stated his hope that other people would leave their money to the city, presumably so that their wills may be ignored and the money used for whatever scam, scheme or mistake Council needs to pay for that week.

2. Also in today’s Daily Dog Trainer, we have two stories that rehash material already presented in this space more than a week ago. There were some pretty funny moments in those articles too, but here’s the funniest one: "Adams said she hasn’t had a chance to review the final audit report because she hasn’t received her copy yet, so it’s difficult for her to comment on the findings." This statement by Adams has all the hallmarks of a lie for many reasons, not the least of which is that the report has been available for weeks now by simply visiting this page of the state auditor’s office. Then there's the fact that she's been talking to state auditors about the report several times a week since it was issued. By far though, the most troubling passage of the articles is this one: "[T]he [state] auditor’s office has every confidence that local officials will take the actions necessary to correct the problems, though Sharon Adams, city auditor, said she’s unable to correct some of them." So there you have it, Citizens, the city’s “auditor” admits she doesn’t know how to fix the problems highlighted by state auditors. (A special note of derision here to Mopey McIntosh who yet again failed to pick up all the leftovers yours truly dropped. Notice in today’s stories there was no mention of the complete lack of oversight regarding the Aquatic Center proceeds.)

3. City officials muddled the water for city employees worried about their jobs and insurance. If anyone believes that city officials aren’t preparing to fire people and cut benefits, those people too are holding on to dreams. Remember- this Coven of Cowards is willing to steal from a dead woman.

4. City officials want legislation that would automatically enroll residents with one of the most corrupt utility providers in North America.

5. The Coven of Cowards has just about succeeded in driving the Becky Thatcher out of town. They bungled the bidding process so badly that they’ve had to refuse all bids, thereby creating more space between the boat’s owner and Council. Moreover, the Coven knows they’ve bungled this and are afraid people will figure out it’s their fault. And it is.

Quite a proud list this week.

Last but certainly not least- One of the audit stories in today's paper claims that the city is facing a $2.1 million shortfall, not a $1.2 million shortfall as the same paper reported last week. More about this over the weekend.

Still More Proof that Council Is Dooming Marietta

2006-01-09T09:50:00.000-05:00

First came the 2004 state audit report detailing how awful the city’s money is managed. (See below.) Then came word of the $1.2 million budget deficit. Today there is still more proof that those elected to lead Marietta are, in fact, leading it right over a cliff. WMOA News is reporting today that the natural gas supplier chosen by Marietta’s city council for the “gas aggregation” scheme is one of the most corrupt utilities suppliers in the country.

The WMOA article also mentions a Canadian newspaper series that goes into a lot of detail about the laws Direct Energy has broken. Click here for a link to the entire series. Briefly, the company that was INVITED to supply natural gas to Marietta by your city council forges costumers’ signatures, enrolls dead people, and tries to defraud priests. Once again- this foul company was INVITED by your city council to do business in Marietta.

No wonder no one on Council pointed to the gas aggregation scheme as an “accomplishment” when running for reelection last fall. Remember- Direct Energy, one of the most corrupt suppilers in North America, was not doing business in our once fair town until they were INVITED by the Coven of Cowards.

More on the Lies of the Dog Trainer and "auditor"

2006-01-08T09:03:00.000-05:00

The 'newspaper' and elected officials are lying to you, Marietta.

The first and most obvious failing of Saturday's Dog Trainer article about the city's budget is that it is nearly entirely "unsourced". That is, there is scant-to-no evidence for statements presented in the article. Here's an example, the very first sentence: "Fewer funds from state government and a shrinking tax base are two key components in the city of Marietta's current financial problem, according to a 10-year review of city government income." Who said there are fewer funds from state government? (Yes, the miserable city "auditor" said so, but she also said the city is getting less money from cigarette taxes, which is utterly false. See below.) Who said the tax base is shrinking? And who in the world conducted this "10-year review of city government income"? The story doesn't ever say, maybe because it was just the twit reporter going over financial reports with the "auditor".

Speaking of dumb and dumber, the third paragraph of the story is just pig-ignorant. Here's a quote: "In 2005, the general fund almost broke even, running a $24 deficit." Note to Mopey McIntosh: when speaking of financial matters the words "almost broke even" are as worthless as your diploma. Who says that the deficit in 2005 was $24? Does the idiot reporter really think that the General Fund was $24 short for the year because it was overdrawn that much back in spring? Again, this factoid is not properly sourced, so readers may presume it either came from the sharp-as-a-sponge mind of the reporter or from the city's lawbreaking "auditor"; either way, don't believe it. In fact, given the mountains of evidence available in numerous state audit reports, it's almost certain that no one, including the city "auditor", any member of the administration, and any member of Council, knows how mucked up the General Fund finances are. (See Citations 4 and 10, as well as Recommendations 2, 3, 7, and 11 of the 2004 state audit report.)

Dog Trainer paragraph five is more baseless and sourceless gobbledygook except for one passage: "officials have vowed to begin implementing several short- and long-term solutions, which could include … delaying the $4.3 million justice center construction project". So- city officials now publicly claim that Marietta has no money, but they will only "consider" "delaying" the $5 million Hall of Justice. (Only a complete tool or a newspaper reporter believes the '$4.3 million' guesstimate.)

Next in the story comes a truly precious quote from Mayor "Little Willie" Mullen: "'In my mind, it is all about our fixed costs for things like labor contracts and health care,' Mullen said." Does anyone in town really want to know the contents of Mullen's alleged mind? Does anyone in town trust the financial analysis of his 'mind'? Does anyone in town plan to vote for this pitiable wimp again?

Happily, more and more often the answer to that last one is "No" but Little Willie seems determined to demonstrate how clueless he is. In the next paragraph, he furthers the myth of bad financial misfortune so as to position the city to deny any contract concessions to the police and fire departments this year. Maybe in addition to shutting off streetlights, Mullen will also get to deal with a strike by first responders. Any of this sound familiar?

Back to the story, one finds a quote from the city "auditor" from back in October. (Now that's some good reportage.) The quote is an admission of incompetence by the "auditor": "I've never seen it hit this rock bottom in the 35 years I've been here," said AAS Adams. Once again, your humble narrator must ask: why is this cur treated like she knows anything about the city's finances? Remember what she said in the Dog Trainer about the overdraft of the General Fund back in April: "[Adams] did admit that the depletion of the fund was not something she expected." (See "Recall AAS Adams Now" from April 2 in this space. -Ed.)

The story from Saturday continues to spread the myths that AAS Adams knows what she's talking about because the newspaper simply does not have the resources or brain power to figure out that she's lying and using the Dog Trainer to spread her dangerous lies. Here's yet another example that closely follows the '35 years' quote above: "In 2004, unencumbered funds totaled a little more than $2.8 million." That fact is not sourced at all. However, it's reasonable to assume that the "fact" came from AAS Adams. Here's what the 2004 state audit report had to say about the General Fund in 2004: "The City did not carry forward the proper beginning balance for the General Fund in 2004 or accurately reflect encumbrances outstanding at year end." (From the 2004 state audit report, Recommendation number 11. -Ed.) The Daily Dog Trainer went to the person most directly responsible for mucking up the General Fund figures for 2004 to find out what the 2004 figures were. (More stellar reportage.)

The next four paragraphs of the story have a lot of conclusions, but no proof, no source, and no clue. Again- the idiot reporter got his information from the one person that has been repeatedly cited by the state for breaking the law and poor management of the city's General Fund as an expert on the General Fund.

Next in the story we find the blatant lies section. See yesterday's entry to read all about AAS Adams's daydream about cigarette taxes.

Finally, we get to wander into the mysterious "miscellaneous fund": "The city's miscellaneous fund typically is not a high-revenue producer, though in 2005 it had a balance of $2.2 million." The first thing worth noting about the "miscellaneous fund" is that it doesn't exist on the auditor's monthly reports. Also, it's not mentioned in the state audit report. Nor is there any fund that in 2005 "had a balance of $2.2 million." (Still more stellar reportage.)

So what is AAS Adams talking about here? That's a very very interesting question. Perhaps AAS Adams has finally admitted the existence of the long-rumored slush fund she's been building up for years. Perhaps AAS Adams is just making up some more stuff, like the cigarette tax fantasy. One hint is in the article itself: "The rest of the miscellaneous fund includes Marietta Harbor funds…" A quick check of the city "auditor" reports for 2005 reveal the "Marietta Harbor Fund" had approximately $738 in November 2005. In January of 2005, it had exactly $0.06. So- the Harbor has its own fund and it had a whopping $738 in 2005. If more money from the Harbor project is laying around in another fund, like the make-believe "miscellaneous fund" then AAS Adams probably broke that law (again). Like the information about the cigarette tax, this info is easily available online at the city's website.

There you have it, gentle readers, a piece-by-piece analysis of the latest attempt by the putrid staff of the Daily Dog Trainer and the city "auditor" to mislead the public. Nice job, everyone.

Still don't believe your humble narrator? Then why was there absolutely no mention whatsoever in the article about the six instances of poor or nefarious fiscal management in the 2004 state audit report, released just days ago?

Today's Lies from the City "Auditor" and the Dog Trainer

2006-01-07T09:01:00.000-05:00

As was predicted by your humble narrator, the Daily Dog Trainer has run a story today that is nothing more than the city "auditor" responding to the charges of incompetence leveled against her here and in the 2004 state audit report. Now- all the proof anyone needs to know that today's story in the Daily Dog Trainer is a complete pack of lies. Mind you, gentle readers, that what follows is only the first and most hilarious evidence that the city's abominable "auditor" makes up facts to divert attention from her mismanagement. This same example is also undeniable proof that the twit who wrote the story didn't bother to check the "facts" he was given by the "auditor".

From the story:

"Adams said recent drops in smoking, while good for the health of citizens, have hurt the amount of money coming into the city from cigarette taxes."

The city of Marietta receives no money from cigarette taxes and never has.

Excerpt from an Ohio Department of Taxation webpage:

"The Ohio tax on a pack of cigarettes is 55 cents. Money from the tax goes into Ohio's general fund, the fund that pays for most state government services."

Click here for a webpage from the Cleveland Federal Reserve Bank that outlines exactly what the Ohio General Fund is used for. (Hint: No local government funding.)

Excerpts from an OSU Extension services site about local government funding (a site that the Dog Trainer reporter obviously did not bother reading even though it was the first result of the Google search of this topic):

"4.6% of the public utilities excise, corporation franchise, sales and use, and Ohio income taxes are placed into the Ohio Local Government Fund, which is distributed by a formula, based largely upon municipal tax duplicates, to local government funds in each county. In addition, 4.2% of the tax on dealers in intangibles is returned to the local government fund of the county of collection (ORC 5747)."

"Counties have the authority to levy 4 1/2 cents per pack of cigarettes and $3 per gallon of spirits to finance the construction or operation of a major league sports facility (ORC 307.696, 307.697, 5743.024, 5743.323)."

"Licenses - Local governments sell many different licenses, including dog and kennel, junkyard, cigarette, peddler, exhibitor and vendor."

The word "cigarette" does not appear anywhere else on the page. In other words, Adams lied.

She also lied throughout the rest of the story, as did Marietta's pathetically clueless Mayor, "Little Willie" Mullen. There are also lies and misinformation in other parts of the story not directly attributable to anyone, since most of the story is without sources.

Actually, the only two sources given are "Little Willie" and AAS Adams, so no one is likely to believe any of it anyway. Remember- just days ago state auditors issued yet another damning report against AAS Adams and cited her and Council for mismanaging the General Fund. Why was none of that mentioned in today's story? Answer: Because the Daily Dog Trainer is a disgraceful newspaper. (All of the evidence in this post was the result of 20 minutes of Google searching. -Ed.)

A line-by-line dissection of the complete story and all the lies therein will appear in this space later this weekend.

The 2004 Audit Report- Part Three: The Management Letter

2006-01-05T07:49:00.000-05:00

As mentioned yesterday in this space, there are ten Citations of non-compliance and fifteen "Recommendations" in the 2004 state audit report management letter. For a detailed look at the report itself and the ten letter citations, see entries from previous days.

To discuss the "Recommendations" in a concise way is not easy because they tend to overlap each other in places. Therefore, your humble narrator has taken some liberties with the order of the "Recommendations" and combined relevant items together. The numbers listed in bold are the numbers from the management letter itself. In quoted passages, the format has been altered for emphasis.

Including the citations, the management letter contains half a dozen instances of poor or nefarious oversight of the city’s "troubled" General Fund. There are four "Recommendations" that involve the General Fund directly, numbers 2, 3, 7 and 11. The two "Citations" are numbers 4 and 10. When added together, they reveal that Art Fordham, Sharon Adams, and Tom Vukovic intentionally kept several tens and perhaps dozens of thousands of dollars out of the General Fund.

RECOMMENDATIONS

1. This "Recommendation" involves the very loose standards the city has taken when dealing with FEMA money. That problem was also the source of Citation number one. As revealed here yesterday, the state auditors discovered that someone in the city (the person is not identified) kept two sets of books for FEMA-related projects and those books don’t balance. In addition to the Citation leveled against the city, the state auditors felt the need to restate the problem in the "Recommendations" section.

Here’s what the second paragraph of "Recommendation" number one says: "During 2004, the City made several FEMA related expenditures from non FEMA funds. However, the authorized agent of the FEMA projects for the City did not keep accurate records of which funds FEMA expenditures were made from." So not only do the two sets of books not balance with each other, they don’t balance within themselves. Whoever the city’s "authorized agent of FEMA projects" is better hope these were honest mistakes and not incompetence or something more sinister.

2. In this "recommendation" there is still more proof that the city "Auditor" and the previous head of council’s finance committee did not do their jobs. Moreover, by not doing their jobs, they helped intentionally bankrupt the city’s accounts.

From the "Recommendation": "During fiscal year 2004, the City made $1,355,061 in advances to and from various funds without the approval by city council in resolution form. Additionally, we noted that an advance from the General Fund to the Sewer Fund for the grit removal project in the amount of $1,730 was not repaid during fiscal years 2003 or 2004. We recommend City Council approve all advances in resolution form and in accordance with the provisions of the Auditor of State Bulletin 97-003 prior to money being placed into the receiving fund. We further recommend that if [sic] the City repay the advance of $1,730 to the General Fund. If repayment of this amount is no longer expected, we recommend that City Council authorize a resolution for this amount to be converted to a transfer."

Reread the first sentence over and over to yourself. Yes, it really does say that more than $1.3 million in city money was moved in and out of accounts all year without any authorization whatsoever for doing so. Further, we also learn that through incompetence and malfeasance, the General Fund was intentionally shorted by $1,730. When one adds that to the several tens of thousands of dollars the General Fund was shorted in 2004 (See Citation number 10 from 2004 and Citation 4 from 2003. –Ed.), it is very plain that certain members of city government have helped intentionally create the General Fund "crisis" over the past year or so.

Why did the city "Auditor" ignore city and state law to short change the general fund? Why did the "Auditor" and Council ignore the repeated citations for this offense? They were TWICE cited in two years for exactly the same infraction that shortchanged the General Fund, and allowed more than $1.3 million in city money to be "loaned out" to other funds but not repaid, all without any legal right to do so.

3. This recommendation is proof positive that the 2006 budget just passed by the new Council is worthless. Remember that in more than one media outlet, and by new finance committee chair Head Wound Harry Vukovic, it was stated that the city "Auditor" and the assistant safety service director wrote the 2006 budget. Here’s what the 2004 state audit has to say about the work of those two individuals:

"The City Auditor and Assistant Safety Director reviewed budget vs. actual information monthly. However, they did not document their review on the reports. The Finance Committee did not review budget vs. actual information from the current year at their meetings. This may lead to the Finance Committee being unaware of significant fluctuations between actual amounts received/expended and amounts originally budgeted, which may need to be brought back to their attention so further action may be taken. … We recommend the City Auditor and Assistant Safety Director indicate their review on the budget vs. actual reports by initialing them each time they review them. The Finance Committee should review budget vs. actual information each quarter for revenues and expenditures. The committee should formally review and approve said reports, with the committee’s approval noted in the minutes."

So- the city’s "Auditor" and assistant safety-service flunky don’t review actual fiscal numbers versus the budgeted numbers and neither does Council’s finance committee. But yet somehow those two individuals were given the responsibility of writing the city’s 2006 budget. More unbelievably, they were given the responsibility of doing so after the management letter that details their ineptitude was issued.

Citation three, then, is not only evidence that the "Auditor" and assistant flunky have no clue, but also that Council’s finance committee did not do its job. Every person on Council, including those newbie dumb asses that voted for the 2006 budget, should have known better.

4 and 5. Simply put- the city has no policy regarding the usage of city-issued cell phones and credit cards. There is absolutely no policy regarding credit cards at all. How reassuring to know that Marietta has such diligent fiscal oversight.

6. Despite his pathetic attempts to appear on top of flooding and other disasters, the Mullen administration still has no disaster recovery plan so that city government can function the day after such an event. Even a minimal plan doesn’t even exist. The state auditors tried to reassure Mayor "Little Willie" Mullen that it doesn’t take a lot of work to make such a plan. From "Recommendation" six: "An elaborate plan is not necessary…"

7. This is short enough to just quote the whole thing: "The City did not have a control in place to assure that amended certificates as authorized by the City Council were reconciled to estimated resources that were posted to the accounting system. This resulted in incorrect amounts being posted to the accounting system. We recommend that procedures be implemented to ensure that estimated resources are accurately posted to the revenue ledger."

So much for Art Fordham’s wise and wonderful stewardship of city money. Also, how many times do state auditors have to point out this problem? It is mentioned in nearly every state audit dating back to the Clinton era and likely before.

8. This one is also so special, because it involves the city once again mucking up federal dollars. The first line of the "Recommendation": "The City’s federal schedule, as presented, was not a complete or accurate listing of federal expenditures during 2004."

Remember how certain members of Council were whining last year that applying for too many grants would jeopardize the city’s ability to win future grants? Head Wound Harry in particular seemed most troubled that the Moonies would apply for a rebricking grant without Council’s approval. Head Wound thought such dealings would penalize the city. Interesting that no one on Council seems to be worried about how often city officials foul up federal dollars already awarded to Marietta. Suffice it to say the state auditors don’t share Council’s negligent attitude.

9 and 10. These involved the city’s capital asset policy and reports. In short, there is no policy and therefore the reports aren’t right.

11. Yet more proof that at least in 2004, there was an active effort to shortchange the General Fund. Here’s paragraph two of "Recommendation" 11: "For the General Fund, the City over estimated revenue for 2004 and significantly under estimated expenditures on their 2004 tax budget. The City did not carry forward the proper beginning balance for the General Fund in 2004 or accurately reflect encumbrances outstanding at year end. We recommend the City accurately prepare the tax budgets for the upcoming years." What clearer proof of financial incompetence does anyone need?

12, 13, 14. These all involve the city’s development department. None of them are about "furnacegate".

15. Number fifteen is troubling but personally satisfying to your humble narrator. It is all about how the Aquatic Center lacked any sort of basic controls on all that cash.

Here is the total "Recommendation": "During July of 2004, the City opened up the Marietta Aquatic Center. The City contracted with Columbus Pool Management to run the daily operations of the Aquatic Center. Columbus Pool Management provided the staff and resources necessary for the daily operations of the Aquatic Center. During our review of the aquatic center [sic] revenue cycle, we noted the following conditions:

- Supporting documentation was not consistently maintained to support the Daily Operations reports prepared by the Columbus Pool Management employees.

- Daily Operations Reports did not consistently reconcile to cash register tapes and the variances were not adequately explained.

- Numerous register tapes were noted for the same registers due to excessive amounts of voided entries and cash register malfunctions.

- Daily bank deposit tickets were not matched to Daily Operations reports.

The lack of internal control procedures did not allow for proper supporting documentation to be maintained for revenue received and deposited by the City for the aquatic center [sic]. This could result in errors going undetected and increase the probability of theft and fraud to occur.

We recommend the City implement internal control policies and procedures to enhance the ability of the City to account for the revenue received by the Marietta Aquatic Center in the following areas:

-Season Passes;
-Daily Admissions; and
-Revenue collection and deposit"

It boils down to this: the money was managed so poorly by the pool and city that it is impossible to tell how much money was ripped off from the facility in 2004.

The management letter was signed by the state Auditor herself. So now we’ve all been warned about how shoddy the financial management of the city has been. Again.

The 2004 Audit Report- Part Two: The Management Letter

2006-01-04T07:03:00.000-05:00

There are ten citations in the 2004 state audit management letter. The identity of who’s to blame for specific citations is not always clear. Several times though the auditors state their case very directly. Most of those passages are quoted below. The city’s piteous auditor is the main focus of the state’s ire.

Some notes before we begin: As one who’s done it twice, your humble narrator confirms it’s a hell of a lot of work to catalog the failures and malfeasance of city "Auditor" Sharon Adams resulting from state audits. Second- for those that might be wondering- there is no mention whatsoever of "furnacegate". In fact, that whole sordid affair was not mentioned at all anywhere in any 2004 state audit report documents. Lastly, the numbers listed are those of the state auditors. They are mostly listed in numerical order except for the first category. The categories are your humble narrator's. A preview of the fifteen "Recommendations" in the management letter is at the end of this list.

CITATIONS- NEW OFFENSES

6. This is perhaps the most deadly and damning citation in the management letter. Nowhere in the language of the citation does it mention exactly who’s at fault. Whoever that person is though, he or she should be very nervous today. Citation six involves documentation of FEMA-related city expenses. Here’s what it says in the second paragraph: "The Force Account Equipment Record Summaries prepared by the city documented hours for employees utilizing FEMA project related equipment that did not agree to the Force Account Labor Record Summaries prepared by the city for the same project’s employees. This resulted in $1,364 of unknown questioned costs and projected questioned costs of $3,000- $6,000. We recommend the City provide adequate supporting documentation for FEMA related projects." In English: two sets of books kept by the city don’t match and they’re out between $4,364 and $7,364; and the state auditors recommend that the city find a way to balance the books since this all involves federal money. Good idea. Too bad it won’t happen. Citizens are unlikely to know the identity of the person who’s been keeping the unbalanced books unless the feds have to come in and straighten this out. Maybe they could take care of the rest of the city’s books while they’re at it.

5. This involves still more shenanigans between the city’s abominable auditor and the municipal court. The gist of the citation is actually the same offense AAS Adams has been repeatedly cited for in the past. Your humble narrator includes it in the ‘new’ category because of the specific offenses. Citation number five states that Ohio law "prohibits subdivisions or taxing authorities [i.e., cities] from expending money unless it has been appropriated. At the following times noted during the year, the following line items had expenditures and commitments which exceeded appropriations by the following amounts: November 30, 2004: Court- General Government-Personal Services- Personnel Benefits … Over-expenditure $12,225; July 31, 2004: Drug Court Grant- General Government Services- Personnel Benefits … Over-expenditure $999"

The citation concludes thusly: "The City Auditor should deny payment requests exceeding appropriations. The City Auditor may request the City Council to approve increased expenditure levels by increasing appropriations and mending estimated resources, if necessary." Instead of taking the diligent steps one might expect of a stewardess of the city’s money, AAS Adams evidently simply gave the court the "Personnel Benefits" the extra, non-budgeted money it requested. This is not the same thing as over-paying the judge; it’s a different infraction. Funny how she has a habit of doing that over and over and over. Funny too she only seems to get caught doing it for the court in one way or another. (See Also: Citation number 4, below. –Ed.)

2 and 9. These citations both involve the plagued Marietta Harbor project. Number two is all about how Marietta Industrial Enterprises was awarded the project even though there "was no change order or no formal approval documented by the director of public safety/service presented for audit for the Marietta Boat Harbor Project … with Marietta Industrial Enterprises, Inc." Also, that project was awarded to MIE without a public bidding process after their original quote totaled $23,790. Anything over $25,000 has to be, by state law, subject to a public bidding process. Imagine how shocked, shocked city officials were to find the project actually cost $36,536.52 when it was all over. The state auditors were probably not so shocked.

Citation number nine also involves the Harbor project and MIE, but in a slightly different way. Simply put, there’s no evidence that MIE paid a "prevailing wage" to its employees for work on the Harbor. This may be due the general lack of paperwork relating to this project and be no bad reflection on MIE. On the other hand, the general lack of paperwork surrounding this project reflects badly on one of two safety-service directors or both. It was left undone either for incompetence or something more nefarious. Without serious oversight by council, there’s no way we’ll ever know which.

CITATIONS- REPEAT OFFENSES

4. This one involves repeat violations of a state law that says "in part, that the total appropriation from each fund should not exceed the total estimated revenue." The General Fund itself was $2,505 short as of December 31, 2004. On that date two other funds were short, the Drug Court and Fire Pension Funds by $27,357 and $7,780, respectively. Those Drug Court appropriations were actually short at least half of 2004 by that $27,357. The auditors noted it in July of 2004 and the problem remained unfixed through the end of the year. Is that the reason finance committee chair emeritus Asinine Art Fordham got his state commendation for service to the city? Perhaps it was because city accounts were short ‘only’ $37,642 at the end of 2004 instead of the roughly $1 million they were short at the end of 2003. Note also that at the end of 2003 and the end of 2004, the fire department pension fund was shorted. (See the February archives of this space for more on the 2003 state audit report. –Ed.)

8. This one is about "Auditor" Adams mucking up salaries for the Development Department again in the same way she was cited for in 2003.

10. This is actually a restatement of a charge first found on page four of the 2003 state audit management letter. Here’s what both reports say: "City Ordinance 90(02-03) specifies the amount of water and sewer fund revenues that should be allocated to the general fund to cover administrative services. It includes a calculation of the amount, $175,470, and the methods used to determine the allocation. The City transferred only $50,000 from each fund in 2004." The 2004 Coven ignored a law passed just the session before stating how much money was to be taken from the funds mentioned. Why this was not done remains unexplained. Maybe it was so certain asinine and milquetoast politicians could point to those revenue funds as signs of financial stability.

CITATIONS- TECHNICAL VIOLATIONS

1. This is a very technical violation involving "the definition of construction, reconstruction, widening…" and on and on. Let’s just say it’s no surprise to find the current governing class has problems with the meaning of words.

3. This is the key passage: "During 2004, the minutes reflect the City did not pass an ordinance to authorize the necessary tax levies until November 4 and no extension was granted by the County Auditor." The legal ramifications about this passage and how the city was thus legally able to collect taxes are best left to lawyers. However, it’s clear that somehow all the touted "institutional memory" of Asinine Art Fordham failed in this case. More importantly, that quote seems to confirm the claim of County Auditor Bill McFarland that the city and county are not communicating and it’s causing problems.

7. This one is pretty technical and involves use of CDBG funds. Here’s the gist of it: "The City did not have a procedure in place that allowed for the proper calculation of draw down requests and enabled the City to comply with requirements to spend program income before requesting federal dollars."

Is any of this how Citizens of Marietta expect their tax dollars managed and spent? If you’re still undecided, here are some sneak peeks of the fifteen "Recommendations" of the state audit: the city has no credit card use policy, the city has no disaster recovery plan, and the state auditors have problems with how cash was handled at the Aquatic Center. Details about these and more later.